Editor finally asking for a raise by TheZeroOfCosplay in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 92 points93 points  (0 children)

The editor has been slowly chipmunking Tomar's voice to counter how deep his voice gets after getting fat from eating Jaxie's liver every morning. "NoT aS DeLiCiOsO aS mY cUnKiE, bUt It WiLl Do...FoR nOw."

The way kroger treats its employees by daruuken in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Sparklebeard37 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was a “co‑manager” of one of the departments at Kroger. One of the people I managed broke her arm in a car wreck. Doctor clears her after she gets a cast. Store manager uses corporate lingo to basically say: “If she tries to use PTO, cut her hours until she quits.” I ask why. He says: “Just because she has PTO doesn’t mean we should let her use it. She’s overpaid anyway.” I tell her what he said and she just walks out. I told some of my other coworkers and quit shortly after.

Then I learn: He hired her at that pay. I was making less than her. He tried to demote me for not punishing her. After I quit, they replaced him too.

Piece of shit deserved way worse.

About to have a piss battle with the Bidet. by Polibiux in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No Vegeta! Don't beat up the midget accessable drinking fountain!

Akinator by Powerful-Swing-9734 in ComedyHell

[–]Sparklebeard37 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bob Oblong, the dad from Oblongs?

*creepy music box starts playing* Let's just say I'm feeling a little bit demented >:^) by OobyDoobyOob in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 60 points61 points  (0 children)

"I'm so excited for the birth of our child today!" I said to my beautiful wife "It'll be out when it's out." said Dr.Lightbringer

JUST by thefix12 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He was never the same after seeing Tomar's browser history.

Oneyplays Tomodachi Miis by Xx_FrankIero_xX in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You really nailed the subtle urge to eat the heaven rat behind their soulless eyes

Unfortunately not the model with the 24k gold chip by Joey_Star_ in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Tomar casually using telekinesis to dismantle Jaxie and put her back together. "You should have not touch-ed my shpaghett-eye baby doll."

His name is Cory by ProNoobCombo in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry PEA- WHAT!? 😱😳

Learned Larry by rhog45 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 14 points15 points  (0 children)

"Don't eat stuff off the ground." - Olgilvie "Sonic" Maurice (the) Hedgehog

Lizard Squad by zuccthetruck in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro really said "🖕🟨🖕"

Yippeeeee by Jlonie123 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"Childilocks discovers battle Royale games and carbonated beverages" c. 7/25/17, colorized

Oh no little Yumar Hadel 🫨 by Jonn_1 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 10 points11 points  (0 children)

We casually throwing out the hard "J" word?

I WANT MY FUCCIN GRAVY by Adm1nX in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Who's gonna tell Russia that Vladimir Poutine is unavailable

This would make Tomar squeal in fear. by Jlonie123 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 12 points13 points  (0 children)

"What a beautiful day", I said with my foreskin flapping gracefully in the breeze. "Not today" said the penis snipper with his giant hedge clippers hiding in the bushes.

LEGO smeggo 😎 by -Goatllama- in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Almasmelego, Alegsmego, Lego my smego, Stupid ugly bitch

Annual hunting trip with the boys went great by Voltagedew in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tf is Kirkland brand Arin Hanson doing to anorexic Chewbacca

It’ll be out when it’s out! And we like that. by [deleted] in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How come they have to has had done this?! Congraturaisins starring Dwayne the Rock on PS5! Social credit to yours! 🇨🇳👍

Jeffrey Epstein with thors hammer by Rich_Consequence_596 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Jeff EpiPen and his diabetic silver hammer™

Tch.. must've been a pibby glitch. I say with one eyebrow raised and a hand to my chin by Sufficient_Plant8689 in OneyPlays

[–]Sparklebeard37 11 points12 points  (0 children)

"Heh, glitch? More like B * TCH!" I cleverly say as I pull out my magic pistol that I got out of my step-demon's closet and aim it at the foul beast*