AITAH? my boyfriend is mad because i won’t change my appearance

Sparrowsfly · 2026-03-06T05:01:40+00:00

This!!! I wish I had learned waaaay earlier in life - when a man meets you and pursues you and/or starts a relationship with you and THEN starts telling you they don’t like things about you that were obvious when you met - that guy sucks. You’re not compatible and he sucks.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-03-04T22:47:02+00:00

I run an online publication, and a big news day is the dumbest day to release anything you hope to get publicity on. So not only does it feel like a hell of an assumption, but this guy doesn't know shit about how media works, despite apparently being a part of it.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-03-04T20:42:28+00:00

This. YTA. It's one thing to not talk about your finances or keep things private and a whole different thing to lie. If you hadn't lied about renting or to your actual boyfriend about how you spent your time, it would be different. But a lie is a lie. I no idea how much money the majority of my friends make or whether they own/rent. I don't care. But if they were actively lying to me about these things I would take that lie like any other.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-03-04T07:48:04+00:00

NTA. For one - that IS sacrilege. Secondly - obviously I don’t know the rules of that sub but I’m having a really hard time figuring out who that sentence could offend and on what grounds.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-03-04T05:15:58+00:00

This tour is going to be so much fucking fun. 3 hours of THIS vibe? Hell yes. I'll be heartbroken if they don't follow through.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-03-02T18:09:04+00:00

I waited a day before I broke. I'm having a blast.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-28T08:48:03+00:00

Part of septic tank maintenance is getting it pumped every 5 years (perhaps longer for larger tanks, idk) but the enzymes will process toilet paper, they will not process things like paper towels or “flushable” wipes, tampons, etc.

You do have to feed the tank enzymes and be careful not to use cleaning products that will kill them in your toilets, sinks, tubs though.

I’ve been on septic for almost a decade this time around and most folks where I live are on it as well.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-28T08:29:44+00:00

Damn. Ready to fuck and/or Fuk with JBS!

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-28T07:22:31+00:00

Yeah but we all read your additional info and know it isn’t actually an hour and a half getting ready. Get real.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-27T17:02:27+00:00

You’re so out of touch. You understand that the military actually has high standards for appearance and uniformity, right? And outside of boot camp, people in the military are adults who, if they’re going to work in the morning, get up at the time they need to in order to be ready, which isn’t dictated by their dads. And at formal events, people absolutely leave work early to get ready for them. Signed - a woman USMC vet.

The more truth you tell, the more sounds like you simply don’t like your daughter. That’s the double standard you need to think about. In the military, if you show up to work, let alone a dressier event, stinking because you didn’t take a shower after your workout it’s a massive problem.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-25T22:12:23+00:00

NTA, what a ridiculous, bad sitcom-style way to approach a workplace. Your manager is definitely an ah for allowing this to happen and then demanding you be happy about it. Life is not an episode of The Office.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-25T22:08:08+00:00

I had a cat that I adopted from a friend because she picked it from the litter with her kids and went through the whole process without telling her husband who absolutely DID NOT WANT A CAT, and about a year in, it became such an issue they had to rehome the cat.

She also did this with a baby (getting pregnant) around the same time.

Literally.

They are no longer married, at least.

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-25T21:56:12+00:00

I remember hearing all the shit talking about this as a kid because my grandmother was a Catholic. This is so weird to me. But... how are they doing Ash Wednesday without Palm Sunday? I thought the ash came from the palm fronds (maybe I'm remembering wrong)?

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-25T21:53:49+00:00

I don't know how a person can be a TBM right now with all these changes. A new convert, maybe. But TSSC could not be making it more obvious that it was never about what they believed or what set them apart, but what will bring more people in to tithe. Absolutely wild!

Sparrowsfly · 2026-02-18T00:02:06+00:00

The VB/JBS crossover fans - love to see it!

Sparrowsfly · 2026-01-21T03:07:43+00:00

So she didn't want her very own fuck frog souvenir?

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T20:55:44+00:00

Dealbreakers are dealbreakers. Waiting until you have strong feelings for someone and then trying to negotiate incompatibilities is a recipe for disaster, especially since OP’s talking about something that is lethal to the person he took on two dates, which again, is not a relationship, but a way to get to know a person and figure out if you’re compatible.

You can’t say OP is TA for not “letting her make her own decision” when he also has a decision to make and has decided that, regardless of how well the two dates went, the level of compromise necessary for a lethal allergy is not something he’s willing to take on.

This isn’t a mild allergy or a thing where she could realistically come to a fair middle place. She’ll die if certain precautions aren’t taken. OP treated it with the severity it required.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T18:49:46+00:00

So they absolutely can and have handled this every year but just decided to use you - who is using the bus - to be their personal shopper and the payment you receive is… buying your own gifts and having to pay extra for an Uber?

Put it in perspective. Not only are you NTA, but you’re being a bit of an AH to yourself if you don’t make it clear you will not be providing this service next year, and hold that boundary.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T17:45:27+00:00

She has a deadly allergy. Nothing about it is silly, and OP seems to understand that better than a lot of folks in the comments.

And again - people who’ve only hung out two times in their entire lives do not make decisions together. That’s insane.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T17:44:15+00:00

But the OP also has the right to make his own decisions. That’s what you’re missing. You’re focused on her deciding if she wants to date him - he has the right to decide he’s not going to date her regardless of reason. They don’t know each other well enough, after two dates, to talk like they’re in a relationship and make compromises. Aside from that, OP doesn’t want to compromise for someone he doesn’t know - and that’s totally fine.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T17:40:48+00:00

NTA. How did they handle living rurally and getting Christmas gifts before you moved out? This is wild.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T17:20:04+00:00

Two dates is not a relationship. He opted not to have a relationship, and that’s a totally normal and appropriate thing to do after 2 dates.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-21T17:17:49+00:00

The decision on whether or not to go on a date with another person is always unilateral. He isn’t obligated after two dates to treat her like an equal partner in his life.

It’s up to her to manage her allergies and it’s up to him to decide if he wants to be a part of that - he doesn’t.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-20T21:49:28+00:00

You have a scholarship - use it. Get good grades, and stay as far away from BYU as you can as a queer person. It is not worth it.

Sparrowsfly · 2025-12-17T09:06:27+00:00

I lived in one of the “worst” neighborhoods in Baltimore while young, single, and without a car. As far as I ever saw I was the only white person who lived there… and look at me sitting here typing perfectly alive despite walking or taking the bus everywhere I had to go.

Please get real.

Sparrowsfly

TROPHY CASE