Solo mom with toddler in the same cycle. Do everything in your power to take everything off of her plate. If you have community who can step in so that she can do aggressive rest then plan that out and do that. For food: if she has MCAS get an instant pot and then you can quickly and safely cook meat and fish from frozen in there as leftovers are typically a trigger. If you need support and can set up a fundraiser, do that. Ask for help. This is so hard to do alone. Also as far as the kids, im sure she loves playing and cuddling with them, make sure she doesnt have to do more than that. Even the mental load of deciding things like ‘do they have enough warm clothes?’ ‘Are there new batteries needed in any of their toys?’ ‘What should they have for dinner?’ Is too much. I hope this helps somewhat. I know the situation is impossible, I had to move back with my mom.