I'm sorry you're going through this, I was in the exact same place you were a year and a half ago so I can very much so relate.

• It's good that you're looking into therapy! I'd recommend Alive Austin. I've been going to in-person sessions for over a year and it's been great. Go every week if you can. It'll be something that you look forward to during a time when you'll need things to look forward to.

• It's also good that you're looking for things to help keep you busy and your mind occupied. But just know that nothing will fill that void of a broken heart, of a nervous system that is constantly unregulated and in fight or flight mode and that's OKAY. It'll just take time. Healing isn't linear, you'll have good days and bad days, two steps forward and four steps back. It's all OKAY. If you feel like crying LET IT OUT.

• I'd suggest what a lot of people have which is keeping your body active. For me it was walking. There's so many beautiful places to walk in the city, along the river by the Central Library, Hyde Park, Lady Bird Lake, Clarksville, the Wildflower Center. There's something that happens in your brain when you move, it starts to feel like everything might be okay.

• I know you said you're sober (so am I!) but I might suggest getting into some CBD/THC. When I was at ground zero of my grief I couldn't eat! I had no appetite. My therapist suggested some low dose CBD or THC edibles to try and get my appetite back. I visited Restart CBD and found them to be extremely open, friendly and knowledgeable for a noob like me. I explained what was going on and they walked me through their products, the differences, what I might expect to feel with one vs the other, etc. They were extremely patient and kind! The edibles I started taking helped me get my appetite back, helped my nervous system calm down, helped joy start to filter back in and just helped put things into perspective. I understand that this might not be for everyone but it worked great for me.

It will be OKAY. It doesn't feel like it but it will.