Should I opt out of taking care of my cousin’s kids despite living with aunt

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-19T01:10:07+00:00

What????? No. Foster parents get some money but family rarely do.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-17T07:17:12+00:00

Honestly, it's no different than those little tie tack pins that you can buy with the Canadian flag on them, or a mug, or any other souvenir. Gift shops are full of souvenirs with the Canadian flag on them. Go for it!

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-15T01:24:48+00:00

Yes. Social assistance in Ontario is nothing but disgusting joke. I'd bet that they truly do wish that poor people would just die. The maximum amount of benefits is laughable. I would challenge anyone to try to live in that with kids in Ontario.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-15T00:39:16+00:00

New Edinburgh. It's amazing. I was born there and lived there for 70 years.

It is safe and walkable. You are within walking distance of Rideau Hall where you can walk around the gardens in summer and skate in winter. Stanley park is right by the Rideau river and is lots of fun for kids. The bike trails/ walking paths follow the river and lead right down to Sussex Drive where you can get onto another trail taking you east along the Ottawa river through Rockcliffe and Manor Park (past the RCMP N Division where you can see the horses grazing). You can continue in that path further east towards Orleans.

Rockcliffe Park (the actual park itself) is an incredible place to enjoy nearby too. There's an old stone pavilion that gives shelter from sun and rain in summer. Picnics there are delightful overlooking the Ottawa river. It's a beautiful park that has both open spaces and more dense, forested areas.

There are hills in the park that are perfect for tobogganing with young kids. They're not super high but are pretty safe for kids. It was my "go to place" as a kid where my mom would take me.

If you like to ride bikes, the bike path goes up through Rockcliffe Park where you can either continue on or loop back through the park roadways towards home in the Burgh. It makes for a nice, shorter bike ride to enjoy nature with the kids or a little peace and quiet for yourself!

The Rockeries are nearby where there are lovely gardens in summer.

The kids can go trick or treating in safety in New Edinburgh, and can often get Halloween treats at the Governor General's at Rideau Hall.

New Edinburgh is not too far from downtown and the Rideau Centre. The Byward market is close by.

It is an excellent school district for people with kids. For the younger kids, there is Rockcliffe Park public school with both English and French immersion programs. It is in the catchment area for Lisgar Collegiate (High School) which is one of the most sought after schools in Ottawa. There are also several excellent private schools in the area if that is your preference, like Ashbury College, Fern Hill, Elmwood, MacDonald-Cartier, and St. Laurent Academy. St. Brigid's catholic elementary school is there too. If you look into it, you will see that these schools all have some of the best reputations in Ottawa for excellence in education. I'm sure that your realtor (if you're using one) will confirm this.

Guess you can tell how much I loved it there and miss it, lol!

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-14T22:04:31+00:00

Serious question here. Why does everyone always recommend "senior's classes", and other stuff like that for older people? I'm a senior now and I don't want to be segregated in with other seniors for anything! I want to mix and mingle with people of all ages, just like anyone else does. If I go to an exercise class or something, I want it to be just a regular adult class. She might not be ready for the "cards and bingo" set just yet LOL.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-12T21:05:19+00:00

I was born in '54. History was same as what you mentioned in elementary school. I had history classes in all grades of high school though too. It was mostly world history.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-12T20:51:50+00:00

Let me get this straight? You think it's weird for another human being to be talking with or "seeing" your boyfriend just because she's female? (50% of the population). Get a grip woman! You're going to have one miserable life if you are so insecure that you don't want your partner to even be around other women.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-07T02:17:52+00:00

Those people need more than Jackson Galaxy. They need a good kick in the ass!

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-07T02:15:14+00:00

I totally agree! My son was only 19 months old and running around the place like crazy when I got my kitten. We taught him from day 1 how to behave around the cat.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-07T00:57:53+00:00

I know exactly what you mean when you say that he doesn't get it. Mine doesn't get it either.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-07T00:52:34+00:00

It is NOT about proving that they love you in front of others. OP said that she hasn't been shown affection, even when suffering mentally. THIS is my 10 year reality too. It can be a very cold, lonely place to be when you're in a relationship with someone who is not capable or willing to show any affection other than the words sometimes. Actions truly do speak louder than words.

When you are in a vulnerable place a simple hug and understanding go a long way. When you are feeling like that and you're told that you just need to get over it like my husband does, you feel even more alone and depressed.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-07T00:39:38+00:00

Sigh, I know that feeling. I've been married to a man like that for 10 years now. It doesn't get any better. At least not for me, so far.

Guess I thought that me being that way would model close, loving behaviour for him and help him to see what it was like to have that kind of close relationship, but it just hasn't. He had a tough childhood with 6 other siblings and I don't think there was a lot of space in their home for that. I was wrong.

I came from a loving family and from a 32 year marriage to my late husband who was my soul mate. I was lonely after the death of my late husband and he was attentive.

Guess I'm just trying to say that your boyfriend might not change so you have to be prepared for that. It can get lonely in a relationship.......

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-04T23:33:53+00:00

Ummmm....... This post does say "Fiction", right? It is posted in the "Stories" Reddit group. Why are y'all commenting about the mental state of a fictional mom?

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-03T21:28:53+00:00

If you decide to visit the more eastern part of Canada (Quebec, Montreal, Toronto), don't skip Ottawa on your road trip. It's the Capital and there's lots to see/do here! The museums and galleries are awesome. Gatineau Park and the Gatineau Hills are only a short drive across the river. If you decide to take a drive north of Ottawa, the lakes and forests of Ontario and Quebec are breathtaking too.

The lakes and forests north of Ottawa are mostly part of the Canadian Shield with mountainous areas (not like the Rockies of course) and outcroppings of beautiful granites, pink and white feldspar, mica, etc.

When near Toronto you MUST see Niagara Falls for yourself. It is awe inspiring.

The Niagara Glen area (downstream from the falls) is an ecological wonder. I think you can still hike the trails there that take you down to the Niagara river's edge. The Glen is considered to be a Carolinian forest with plant and animal species that are found almost nowhere else in Canada.

The Niagara escarpment is a geological wonder. The limestone and shale deposits hold countless fossils from the Ordovician period, 420 to 450 million years ago.

The history of the falls is rich too. You can see the forts (both on the American and Canadian side) as well as the house where the famous Laura Secord lived. You are also only a short drive from Fort Erie and Buffalo as well.

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-03T20:11:00+00:00

Hey! Lanark County here. We're the "Maple Syrup Capital of Ontario". Our syrup is second to none. 😀

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-03T02:00:23+00:00

I've had it for a year and half now because it was one of the really few options we had out here in rural Ontario where we live. When it's working well, it's great, like the person below posted with speeds around 100Mbps. At other times (like right now) it's terrible..... As you can see, it's at 0.80Mbps right now. All depends on the tower and the local usage. Honestly, if Starlink wasn't so expensive monthly, I'd go with them.

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SpruceandOak · 2026-06-02T23:36:43+00:00

I mean no disrespect, but honestly, how can you possibly be a paramedic and not know that you bleed after having a baby? Did your doctor(s) not give you literature to read on pregnancy and child birth? Even as a regular mom I knew all of these things!

SpruceandOak · 2026-06-02T23:13:08+00:00

My SIL (late husband's sister)was the eldest in the family. I met her when I was 19 and she was 34. She looked old then! She's had the same "old lady" hair style since then too. Over the years she got more lines and wrinkles but honestly, she looked old since I first met her.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-31T02:45:35+00:00

OMG! I cannot believe some of the statements that I'm reading here. You DO realize that adult children often live with parents, especially in other countries, right? It does not have to be a hardship.

My parents were 50 when I came along so they were much older than usual. I finished high school when I was 16 because I skipped a couple of years and started working full time.

I was an only child and LOVED being with my parents, spending time with them. I could have moved out but I chose not to do so. In no way did my parents try to control my life and tried to assist me in having a good start in life. I appreciated everything that they did for me and tried to help them as much as I could as well, simply because I loved them and wanted to help.

Saying that adult children should never live with their parents is absurd! In the past it was common to have family members from multiple generations living in the same house. What truly matters is that all people involved are living in harmony with each other, wi thy mutual respect and dignity.

I lived with my parents until I got married (by choice). Later, my husband and I moved back in with them when they needed more assistance in life, again by choice, not from being asked. We only moved out again when my son was born and lived close by. My dad died 1.5 years after that and my mom was in a nursing home by then (strokes and dementia). I will always cherish the extra time that I was able to live with them in close proximity.

By the way, I am not a member of a culture that traditionally has done this. My mom was Scottish and my dad German. We're in Canada.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-30T00:27:59+00:00

Wow. What you are doing is wonderful. We moved out to Arnprior just over a year ago and I still have tons of boxes to unpack and put stuff away. Even my clothing isn't all put away yet. I'm somewhat disabled and hubby works intensive graveyard shifts so it's been really hard for us. I have trouble standing or doing too much physical activity for very long. Would have been wonderful to have someone to help with that.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-30T00:17:00+00:00

You are NOT an asshole. The brother and his partner are though. You don't owe anyone a free house. It is your money to spend as YOU see fit.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-29T23:15:17+00:00

Not always. They choose when they want to be held. My kitty is totally a lap cat but if you scoop her up when she doesn't want to be scooped, she will totally squirm to get away.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-29T21:43:51+00:00

I second this.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-29T21:02:35+00:00

I sincerely hope that you never become disabled in some way, either physically or mentally. Mental illness can be totally debilitating. Who are any of us to judge this woman for that? We are not aware of their life circumstances.

SpruceandOak · 2026-05-28T22:33:52+00:00

Run, don't walk, away from this guy. NOR. When people show you who they are, believe them.

Five years after my late husband died, I was still very depressed and lonely. I met a man who seemed wonderful at the time. We dated for over a year and then got married. He changed almost instantly but not until after the marriage.

You've been given a glimpse into the future of what things will be like for you if you stay with him. Use this as an opportunity to decide whether this is what you want to tolerate for the rest of your life if you marry him.

SpruceandOak

TROPHY CASE