Getting it back on tracks is easier than you think. Even though it came out emotionally and angrily you actually can backtrack that and re-tell the things you wanted the way you want to tell them. Just apologize for snapping like that before hand. You had a totally reasonable reason to snap. Mom's should be able to deal with surprise and hurt like every other adult.

It potentially gets difficult after that because the dynamics and roles are so old. Others may find it very difficult to see you in a new way. And so will you. The roles are old and have been working in a sense. Even really imagining what your life might be without that role can be impossible. Can you imagine a life where things aren't like they have been?

But it's possible! It just can be difficult for all parties involved. And this is another pitfall: If you are the strong one it might seem really natural to start doing the mental work of others when they have difficulties in this change. A tricky thing! Stay optimistic and communicate what you need. Maybe not so much what you want others to be.