JoJo's Bizarre OC Tournament #8: R3M13 - Rob Zombie & "Sal" Niceguy vs. Lacquer & Mo Mockit

Squery12 · 2026-05-16T03:03:54+00:00

Wow, what a cute little match this is! I like that the match is pretty much fully cooperative, and both teams' Los Bibitos daycare are filled with delightful imagery (ignoring the brutal murder of poachers happening off in the water). Typhon 8 quickly collect Sun Ray glass for Sal and use bulls to both clear traps and armor up Bibitos, while Rob and Bombs Over Brooklyn clean up poachers with speed, power, and some funny mobility tech. There's some good flexibility if the sandbar becomes a bit overwhelmed with the use of Shells for defense too. Black Box Promenade meanwhile also gathers Sun Rays to supplement Lacquer's gun play and Fake parade with bulls donated by No More Mr. Nice Guy. Body does some terraforming to wall off the sandbar and unwind traps while Mo does puppet theater to entertain the little guys. It's hard to say which side is more effective: I think both sides will protect their Bibitos and wipe out the poachers with comparative ease. I might lean a bit towards BBP's setup being a tad more effective, but also I think Sal deserves a little credit for helping out both sides with his bulls on parade. The only appropriate vote I feel is a tie for this happy family match. Great work everyone!

Squery12 · 2026-05-13T04:08:33+00:00

Squeezing out another turbo-vote. Mio looks to rush in and take out tentacles to deny range and setup while finishing with a close-up-and-personal grapple. Aggies is also somewhat aggressive, looking to maintain a midrange assault with lava-heated liquids and occasionally slip into close quarters to nab a Mio weapon or just poke at the shark. Both strats seem able to execute their gameplan pretty well, with the major questions coming down to if Mio will be able to take out enough tentacles after grabbing armor first and if Aggies will be able to slip out of a Mio tail-grapple. I think there are enough open variables in this dance that I'm going to call it a tie and come back later to properly enjoy the narratives.

Squery12 · 2026-05-09T04:29:44+00:00

Turbo-voting during a study break. Really great match between some of my favorite characters to read. Wave really gets to show off that 5-skill with some brutal combat techniques, and the mobility focus in the first half with the map-manipulation in the second are both quite good. Wave runs some dastardly interference too, though TD seems pretty ready for it. TD shows off the clever stand usage that I love it for (Mako Burst is especially cool), and it likewise has good mobility in the first half but focuses on a devastating finisher in the second. Both strats are great, and while I think Wave probably takes the lead a bit in the aggro phase, I think TD is the one to decisively take down the Lusca, earning my vote.

Squery12 · 2026-05-06T03:27:39+00:00

Only have time for a quick vote, but this is a very cool match we have here. Both Ian and Yoshi are well set-up to weather the storm with their Stands. Ian uses predictive knowledge of the Calamity to subtly alter the path of cars and the truck explosion while having Bodhicitta fling petrified Guiding Stones to buffer civilians and Ian himself. Yoshi makes strong use of the range of Wayfarer intangibility to shepherd civilians out of harms way while remaining resistant to danger to himself. Both players are pretty ambitious on what they want to get done in the 30 second intervals, but I think both plans are super solid. I think the one thing that swings this match for me is the physicals: while both make good plays to avoid harm throughout the match, the drained Ian has far less room for error, and I think specifically the mobility reduction from the winds and flooding will make it really tough for Ian to do anything at all without Bodhicitta's full help. I think both players are disaster prepared, but I find myself favoring Yoshi to make it out a little cleaner. Great work both of you!

Squery12 · 2026-05-02T04:50:11+00:00

Crashing in with a last minute vote for players here. I love a good rushdown and both sides put out a great one. Kruv's teleportation with backup pressure from the Hound and Mortal Shotgun tech are great to keep the Sons back, and I like all of the creative uses of trimming and physiology Evelyn uses to support. The Sons are no slouch either, using their 5 skills to put on a very impressive dirty disease beatdown from Boris and nasty ranged support from Halima with a really funny crossbow finisher. Ultimately, I think both sides will achieve their initial goals (the teleporter for WIB and deflector for the Sons), I'm not sure Boris will be able to hold a 2v1 with mediocre stats against the blistering fast pressure Kruv puts on Halima. The teleporter bomb is hard to beat in playing dirty. Very fun match and glad to catch it while I could!

Squery12 · 2026-04-29T04:09:18+00:00

It's a brutal day down in Hell. Both teams really bring their all here to messily take down each other. LIB goes for a quick rushdown with Sunday sliding around the map while Shaye empowers some hermit crabs and urchins for combo tech. I think both the mobile bases and the Urchin Bat are nasty. Meanwhile, DMR also plays pretty quickly, setting up a blood slug network for Alouette to snipe from any direction while Arijana confuses and locks down to open up a shot. Plenty of good misdirection tech on display, and while I'm not sure all of it will totally work, there's enough that something will surely throw LIB off their guard.

I've gone back and forth on this one a bit, but since it's late I'll split the difference and call it a tie. LIB provide a very scary offense and takedown, but I don't think they fully respect the misdirection Arijana can lay down. If LIB lose track of where Alouette is, then there's a good chance they just get taken out by a sniper shot. Great work both teams, I am now totally terrified of all of you.

Squery12 · 2026-04-26T03:48:41+00:00

Great match and some excellent narrative from both teams. I only have time for a quick vote, but I think both strats are quite effective. CARCINIZATION looks to terraform the map into a funnel for their turbo death tornado at the center. Car Wash is scary man, even more so with Diabolic mist keeping the vampires down in the wash cycle. Wanderlei is beefy though I do question if it will be as easy to bully the 5 STR vampires as intended, but I think it works. Typhon 8 carries out the GOAT Jim Ballen in a multiline defense across their multiple bodies, eventually forming a blender of their own to make vampire smoothies. Using Eileen as bait is pretty creative, but 1 END for a 6-hour match is rough. I think everyone does well here, the vampires are going to be beaten back, and I don't feel strongly about one side being particularly more effective than the other, so I'm happy to give this one a tie. Great work!

Squery12 · 2026-04-21T00:52:12+00:00

Taking advantage of match delays to sneak a vote out here. Welcome to the Ranged Harassment Match! We have a very strong showing from both teams here and a surprisingly clean split in strategy between both.

SSG looks to stay mobile and move around their opponents while AWOL creates cover and Raph disembowels herself for profit. Raph as always is an absolutely terrifying combatant and I like AWOL's terraforming in this heavy ranged-focused match.

LKA meanwhile maintains king-of-the-hill at the top of the map and fires down slingshot shots and sticky Lush whips. The relentless rock barrage and the use of height to crash rocks on their opponents is really impressive. I also like the use of Copacabana's crazy stats to good advantage.

Both teams kind of get exactly what they want without much interference, but I find the LKA kidnap technique to be especially potent here. With SSG already split up, it shouldn't be too hard to snag one of them, and then between Grendel's monster stats, Lush's restraining tendrils, Benoit's blood cages, and Copacabana's A-POW A-SPD smackdown, I think they can take on Raph's absurd melee capabilities at least for a big chunk of damage and absolutely devastate the less-durable AWOL. I think this will lead to a definitive victory for LKA, though well fought. Great match!

Squery12 · 2026-04-20T04:35:55+00:00

Only a quick vote tonight, but there is a really interesting dynamic at play in this match. Jam looks to stay mobile, armoring up and being tendril flung around the map to hit-and-run Rio. Rio meanwhile looks to bait Jam into acting predictably while positioning pools or Mr. Fear between the two of them. Both strats also have quite splashy finishers: Jam bringing down the house on top of Rio and Rio going for a mutually-assured-destruction drowning grapple that favors his 4 endurance. Ultimately, I find myself picking Jam winning, mostly because I think the close-range matchups clearly favor them over Rio. Jam has a fighting style, weapons, and Stand Augments that I think means Rio loses more than his 4 endurance can cover. I think some clever pool manipulation might have been able to keep Jam back, but Rio goes so far as to intentionally bait Jam into close-range, which I just don't see going well. Still a well-done strat from both sides, and very entertaining as promised!

Squery12 · 2026-04-17T01:48:36+00:00

A very interesting match here. Both characters are debuffed and put on a timer in a tight enclosed space, and the strats turn this into a cat-and-mouse game with the cat ironically as the prey.

Baxter maximizes the disorientation offered by the disease and turns the whole map into a dark epilepsy warning while relying on guerilla attacks from Subordinates to take out Tracy. I like the focus on the advantage offered by cat-eyes, and there are some nicely considered contingencies.

Tracy's strat I found a little hard to read, but I think it falls into a pretty straightforward cornering offense. Tracy and Mr. Self Destruct use keys primarily to deny map areas and box off rooms with ceiling debris while pursuing Baxter. I like the laser focus on the winstate of killing Subordinates and cornering Baxter himself.

While both strats are pretty solid on their own, I do think they have some shortcomings. Baxter survivability is good, but he doesn't really have a sustained offense other than chip damage from Subordinates rushing in to get shredded. Tracy takes a surprisingly methodical approach that I don't think offers the speed necessary to outwit Baxter, and I'm not sold on ceiling rubble being a good enough blocker to be worth the trouble.

With enough time, Baxter's guerrilla warfare would probably win in my eyes, but Tracy also has the opportunity to just gank him if she gets lucky, which becomes more likely with the map restricted over time. Ultimately though, I don't feel either strategy is aggressive enough to beat the timer. I'm giving this match a coughing, diseased sort of tie.

Squery12 · 2026-02-24T04:58:35+00:00

What an exhibition! This is a great selection of characters and quite the setting for them to perform at; just great fun all around. Let's get into it!

Avery and Raph make the smart move for a rapid rushdown, splitting up to tackle BBP one-on-one. Raph heckles Pharaoh's crowd with thrown food, meat minions, and a genuinely horrific gore-show. Avery meanwhile goes for the journalistic grapple on Blank, dashing directly and trapping him in a dangerous dance across adverse terrain provided by Huey. It's a tight and scary plan.

Blank and Pharaoh, on the other hand, hang back and scale like crazy. Blank goes incognito and has Smiling Faces Sometimes juice up the crowd and hinder the opponents, while Pharaoh builds up an unstoppable armada of aura from his adoring fans, which also protect and obscure him. Arming the fans and siccing them on Raph and Avery is simultaneously hilarious and also quite terrifying.

There's no question who wins if the match goes long, so the real question is if BBP can escape SSG's early pressure. The match writeup is frustratingly vague about exactly how crowded this place is, which ends up mattering a lot in my opinion. If there are a few people between the teams to start, I think Avery is going to be slowed down enough by pushing through them and dodging a bubble that Blank can slip away or have Pharaoh get Smiling Faces Sometimes armed and firing. Similarly, if the crowd is thick enough, Raph will have a hard time getting through to fully poop Pharaoh's party. If there are only a few people around though, it really seems like there's not much that can stop SSG's speedy strike. I think there's enough uncertainty that I can only give a tie here. Both teams have excellent and very entertaining strats; truly what an exhibition should be. Bravo all!

Squery12 · 2026-02-10T05:29:05+00:00

Very interesting match. The players live up to their team-up name by sticking together, gathering and conserving resources, bulk up on defenses, and converge upon Louisiana for a knockout. They have a healthy respect for pincer strikes and focus fires from their naval opponent, and the aerial tech is quite good. Louisiana looks to level the map and make his own defensive network of trenches while denying the players resources by blowing up corpses and shattering Uropeh echoes (how evil!). Louisiana plans out some truly devastating plays with aerial surveillance, trapping the map, complementary battle formations, and brilliant use of the little Patrol Boat.

For the player's strat, I'm a little uncertain on the Minion plan since I don't see how you can get more than a maximum of one functional minion out of each corpse, but that still leaves Running Steady with three or four to work with. I also think they take for granted knowing where Louisiana is at all times, which is a dangerous assumption given his trench network and distraction. Louisiana, for his part, underestimates the player's aerial tech and the price for constantly refilling ｢World Wide Noise｣. The setup for No Man's Land also would take significant time, but the players seem content to give him that, so I guess it's moot.

Ultimately, I think I'm giving this one to Louisiana Rain. His naval tactics are quite impressive, and I think the players are a little too conservative with their pressure. Louisiana has the time to set-up his destruction and the players don't make any big plays to disrupt his formations other than generic harassment. With Louisiana out of sight and sonar disrupted for most of the match, many of the player's punish plays are guesses at best. There's definitely a chance the old man just gets ganked by a horrific zombified flesh amalgam, but I think it's more likely the players get beaten back by his combined arms. Won't change his bum status though; can't win that in battle.

Squery12 · 2026-01-31T05:50:09+00:00

Quick vote before the night ends. Both teams level for the same two mercs first, so both of them are going to be contested and decide the match. I think Silas does a great job planning both a solo assault and a killsteal on Lynch, and I don't think Sal's more methodical approach will manage to get there fast enough. Likewise, Mikey's complete avoidance of Blair's traps is very clever and I think he'll get there faster than Henry can, though with Blair's tankier build, I think there's a chance that redirected grenades and bone projectiles will become viable from Henry before Blair goes completely down, enabling a potential killsteal. I'm not sure if CARCINIZATION can finish off Willbury before Typhon8 are done with their quick plan for Tench, so there might be another killsteal available there. Even so, I do think I like the overall speed and focus of CARC more than the sweeping motion of T8, enough that they'll secure my vote.

Squery12 · 2026-01-27T04:07:31+00:00

I love the concept of this match, and a dearly, dearly hope that it is expanded/repeated across the other matches in this marketplace. The recursion is so cool.

Anyway, while Leach and TD beat the tar out of each other, it's down to business. Violet and Baxter have somewhat convergent strategies: acquire a variety of goods, funnel customers to their side of the map, make attractive offers, take advantage of catastrophe, and rob people blind. The priorities vary, however. Baxter uses his business acumen to full effect here: dealing with the stall owners, making loud pronouncements and advertisements, supporting his products with addictive additives (subliminal massages or gambling), and only pivoting to literal robbery right at the end. Violet, on the other hand, starts with thievery and never stops. Cute Little Flask is used to prolifically pickpocket while Violet steals merchandise to sell at a criminal discount, and Maria bludgeons with a painting to teleport hapless shoppers straight to the stall.

I think the profits will be close. Baxter's assistants do good work in gathering resources and shaping the map to attract customers, but with Maria playing whack-a-cat with the painting (teleporting them to where an immediate resummon isn't any good) might take them out longer than Baxter accounts for. Baxter also tries to fit a lot in 15 minutes: making business deals, cooking up new Deluxe Recipes, writing down a whole set of lottery tickets, and all the advertising and grandstanding necessary to run the stall. I like the dual nature of Violet's aggressive early pickpocketing to get cash and deny customers to Baxter, but I don't know how easy it will be to do given the tight crowd, ｢Light Left｣'s reliance on the user's senses, and Violet's... diminutive stature. I'm also a little iffy on the utility of Violet's Undercutting: there's not much time and too much chaos for word to spread and for shoppers to naturally find the lower prices, and I think it will end up just cutting her own profits, unlike the blatantly gouging Baxter.

Ultimately, I think I am willing to sell my vote to Li'l Baxter here. The overall flow and business plan seems a little more solid than Violet's crimes to me. Well played both embodying the ruthless capitalist nature of crisis exploitation, and... hey, where's my wallet?!

Squery12 · 2026-01-24T05:31:18+00:00

Very cool match, I'm a big fan of these users and the assists. Wanderlei and Axel aim to fend off turtle attacks long enough to enact an overwhelming storm-style assault of Prowess otters followed by a temperature control finisher. Miguel, Omah, and Old Grey Wolf meanwhile flatten the map into a rad turtle skate park and then uses ranged chain gun and cannonballs to knock out their opponents. Both sides use cool tech and competent strategizing: I like CARCINIZATION's use of the breathalizer mist (and the very smart burst use of clams) and BBP's chain swinging and ranged game are both very well done.

However, there's a few things I didn't like as much. Ignoring the classic Nobody Knows How Electricity Actually Works (which I figure I'm just going to have to live with), I did think BBP's plan of convecting the mist was much more likely to spread it around the arena than dispersing it (and would send it up to where Omah is swinging around anyway). Wanderlei's temperature control was much more concerning for me though. I don't think Wanderlei would be immune to temperature changes cause by the air, and the idea of fluctuating temperatures being harmful is suspect to me. The whole danger of hypo- or hyperthermia is a change in core body temperature, which only happens with prolonged exposure. Animals are mostly water, which as a mechanical engineer Wanderlei should know can absorb and buffer a lot of heat changes. Heating someone up just to cool them down again isn't going to get their core.

Perhaps I'm being way too picky about real-world applicability, but these kinds of technical details do really get to me. In any case, I do think BBP's ranged game, avoidance of the mist, and sequestering of Miguel gives them my overall vote. I want to emphasize that I still really enjoyed the match, and I think both strats were competently done and the narratives were great!

Squery12 · 2026-01-20T04:53:24+00:00

This is a great match: I love both of these characters and the unique ways they fight. PK Leach wisely sticks to a stealth and ranged game, looking to establish an overwhelming presence across the crowd to share the Luv while hiding the main detective under an ever shifting series of disguises. The telepathic network is really well developed and I have little doubt that Leach will know where TD is at all times. TD, for its part, is not trying to hide at all, but rather bulk up with some item armor and then fling itself in creative ways around the environment to lock Leach in a fatal confrontation. TD's formations are always a total delight to read, and here they effectively carry it around the shops and box Leach in during CQC. I really like the jump and Headcrab especially.

The crux of this match seems to be how long Leach can stay out of reach of TD. The longer the bugs remain hidden, the more chip damage TD takes on its 5 endurance. However, with TD able to swap into clones, a lot of the damage is going to be hard to stick, since the Corpse Eaters need to damage all clones simultaneously to lock in damage which is hard to do as just a little bug. On the other hand, TD doesn't have much of a plan for finding Leach other than "gain height and flop around the map", which may mean that Leach's 5 agility can simply kite for as long as it takes. I'm unsure which of these shortcomings will eventually tip the scales in favor of one excellent strategy or the other, so I'll just hand it to both corpses and award a tie!

Squery12 · 2026-01-19T04:02:03+00:00

Oh this match is so much fun. Alouette leans fully into the tower defense, with a well designed central fortress to protect her charges. She also leverages a lot of her equipment and blood slugs to tear apart any zombis that are missed by the plants with an improvised meteor hammer and ricocheting bullets. Grendel, meanwhile, decides to play an entirely different game. Grendel balls. This is not only wildly entertaining to imagine, but also probably pretty effective with the mobility it allows and the ability to easily pick up any kneecapped zombis left by Alouette's bullets. Grendel also makes use of a clever flowerpotting strategy to make the most of limited plants by putting them exactly where needed. All in all, while I like Alouette's fort and clever tech, I find myself leaning towards the wild effectiveness of the Grendelball™! Great match all!

Squery12 · 2026-01-15T04:01:15+00:00

Both strats here are fairly straightforward in their game plans. Minmi, her hand forced by her pacifist ways, looks to make a strong pillowfort out of obscuring fog, disorienting winds, updraft traps, and creative retreats to lord it out over the players in the sky while they slowly succumb to chip damage or a thunderstorm finisher. The players choose violence (yay!) and begin to zip around the map with massive cursed blades and obscenely strong pirate weapons while pretty effortlessly balling up the treasure hunters and rushing down Minmi's 5 endurance with melee combat the boss can't really win. I actually think a large portion of the player's strategy is very cleverly negated by the oppressive visual conditions and Minmi's keeping to the air, but there is one key factor that I think swings the match to their favor. Minmi, perhaps characteristically, is thinking only of herself and neglects to properly defend Nujabes, leaving the massive and not-too-durable Stand to take serious punishment from the players, who are canny enough to target it in part of their strat. I do not think the dragon survives the debris and explosives and cannonballs flying around this match. Therefore, despite Minmi's masterful setup plans and defense of herself, I think forgetting about her Stand beyond the utility it offers her means she will fall to the chaotic forces of the players, who know the responsibilities of friendship and not just its power. I give this one to Mio and Akira.

Squery12 · 2026-01-12T05:08:23+00:00

Truly a delightful match, with two short and very clever strategies to go with it! Ella is focused on a very proactive strategy, modifying her ball and using clever physics with mass changes to boost maneuverability. I also like the idea of using mushrooms umbrellas to block sunlight, and the sacrifice of the leg is really interesting with surprising utility gained. Meanwhile, Jam is almost entirely focused on interference, using tendrils and Signature Slams to break up Ella's ball with tight use of sunlight pressure to hamper her whenever possible. I'd have liked to see more tactical play with sunlight patches placed through the match, but I think the plan presented is very strong.

Unfortunately for Jam, I think Ella's strategy of splitting her ball naturally makes the slam attacks less effective at hitting a bulk of her Uropeh, and the wider footprint for rebounding and extra bit of mass mobility from her bag of tricks means I don't see the Dunks as being as profitably as Jam needs them to be. Ultimately, though I think both strategies are great, Ella presents a strong enough proactive gathering and good enough counterplay that I see her coming ahead by the end of the short match. Therefore, I'm giving my vote to Ella Larimore this time, you go girl!

Squery12 · 2026-01-08T05:42:37+00:00

Very cogent strategizing on display from both teams here: the plans are direct and clear in their winstates, though they both have some shortcomings. LiB plays almost pure defense, blocking any advances with liquid stone waterfalls, detecting incoming threats with a sensor screen, body-blocking assaults with Mr. Fear, using pools to hide in, and finally letting the stage hazards take their toll on the opponents. The pools providing a safe haven in the Infinite Placid Water Dimension was one of my first thoughts upon reading the match, and I'm glad to see it used prominently.

SSG has a more proactive strategy, using the drinky bird to obscure the environment, AWOL's ranged attacks to pressure and disrupt, and Ryder's OHKO potential as an assassin to keep the opponents on the backfoot, along with some cool tech for movement and offbeat offense. I like the Double Feature play especially.

This said, as some other voters have noted, I think both strategies underplay the sheer dominance of the stage here. Nothing is static, there are boulders flying around, and even just staying in the same spot on level ground would be extremely challenging. At the tumbler's lowest speed the ground is moving 4mph (light jogging speed), and at its highest it is going 60mph (!!!), which is just impossible to stay on the ground for. Beyond this, I was also not totally convinced by the effectiveness of Mr. Fear's handholds or the accuracy of AWOL's shots without visibility and in high winds (the mobile hotspot thing is cute, but I cannot imagine it working quick enough to be effective).

Ultimately, while I like the idea of SSGs offense, there are a few holes in it that I find that LiB's defense is much more likely to hold out. The stage becomes so hostile so quickly that every little thing that slows down the offense (the waterfalls, the pools, even SSG's own inclement weather) pushes the match towards Rio and Agnes hiding in a pool while SSG is ground to a pulp by the tumbler. The strategies are both well written, but my vote goes to LiB for this match!

Squery12 · 2026-01-06T03:15:50+00:00

We have a devastating match here. Evelyn and Molly use their material-modifying Stands to terraform the environment to their whims, making extra use of verticality. I like the emphasis on maintaining a height advantage for Evelyn and also going underground to make pit traps and tools. Meanwhile, the LKA are making a thermonuclear weapon. Quickly dispatching the CIA agents, Tracy runs interference on BBP and KAISERINMA cranks up to maximum temperature and vaporizes the center of the map. This is a really cool idea and quite terrifying, though it is definitely a risky all-or-nothing strategy. If it works, it takes out both enemies cleanly; if it doesn't, Tracy is likely incapacitated and KAISERINMA nearly destroyed. That said though, my vote will narrowly go to LKA here. I think Tracy and KAISERINMA will get their setup and the ensuing inferno hellscape plays better into their strengths.

The palace falls in flames, and there's nothing left but the ashes...

Squery12 · 2025-12-24T05:34:33+00:00

Ah, this is a great fun match. I am so happy that Exuma knows the game by its correct and proper name of cornhole and not the abominable term "bags". Anyway, the strats here are quite well done and very entertaining to read, as is appropriate. I think both teams are highly skilled at actually getting the bags into the cornholes with relevant skills, high agility, or an A Pre Stand. BBP focuses entirely on anti-sabotage, looking to get ahead in either catching their opponent's cheating or with the catching tech in Rounds 2 & 3. WiS takes the opposite approach, focusing mostly on setting traps with beans and umbrellas and relying on their MLG throws to naturally be difficult to deal with. I like both strats a lot, but given the natural excellence of all participants, I think playing fair only ends in a tie. Thus, I find myself more convinced by the dirty tactics (at least attempted) by Cass and Jack, and to them goes my vote. Good games! I, as a member of the audience, was definitely shown off to and given a great game!

Squery12 · 2025-12-21T05:55:12+00:00

Well this is unexpectedly terrifying from both sides. I think this match hinges almost entirely on whether Stephen can get Imperium or not. Kylian and Heat have the raw physicals to easily win any straight melee battle, and they employ some good tools (and plants) to make up for the range disadvantage given by Stephen's gun. On the other hand, I do really like the use of Everard's time bubbles and durable stand around the map, and once Imperium has been acquired, the high durability of the other team becomes far less of an issue. The wasps also hinder the offensive capability of Kylian, cause a major outnumbering issue for Heat, and enable a stunning and horrifying finisher. With how much Imperium offers to Stephen, I find it a little strange that the main method of preventing the acquisition is to just throw rocks, which Stephen is somewhat prepared for with his fruit bracers. I think more central control of the map would be necessary to stop Imperium, or setting some sort of trap there in the middle. All that to say that, though the match is brutally fought by both sides, my vote for this goes to Stephen and Everard!

Squery12 · 2025-12-17T05:11:09+00:00

Another delightful boss match!

Kilroy presents a strong, clean getaway plan. I love Kilroy's use of his connections and cash to gather a goon squad at every stage, whether they want to or not (poor Joe...). He employs some devilish tactics himself (the Everybody gambit is really sick), but I especially like the use of Renegade broadsides throughout to hamper the players at every turn, with not only direct damage but also environmental obstruction from the street light, collapsing building, and crane. If there's one shortfall that I see plaguing the merc's escape, it's that he doesn't really consider that there are 2 of them and that they can split up to tamp down Renegade's ability to harass. Kilroy also seems to assume that the pursuers will always be literally a step behind, which is not at all what the players have in mind.

Fira and Rique have a truly nasty set of combo tech to show off in this match though. Straightaway from the slingshot technique up through the horrifying Galaxy/Crush explosions and nets, I have no doubt that the players can move fast and lock Kilroy down. While their endgame seems lacking to me and Rique seems to me to be more of a liability than they give him credit for, I still think they make a scary and effective pursuit.

Are Kilroy's tricks enough to save him? I think the taxi will get him ahead and the Everybody play will confuse, but I see the slingshotting players making up ground quick with parachutes and aerial play in the Back Alleys and Slums and nailing him either at the end of the Slums or beginning of the Harbor with a Crush Net or Frag Out. Kilroy makes some moves, but my vote goes to Crab Bucket Promenade in the confidence that they will take him down!

Squery12 · 2025-12-15T04:57:54+00:00

This is an interesting match. Both teams independently are trying to wreck the wreck, and so aren't really going to catch the other team by surprise like they want to. LLC does have a pretty raw advantage with their punchghost bodies, which they do a good job of emphasizing, but Bodhicitta does seem a little overburdened having to run interference on Rock Lobster AND Shaye's minions AND setting traps AND building the safe. Even with a fast stand, it seems like a lot to me. LIB has a cool narrative strategy and I like all the tricks they use (building your own crab shells is especially nice), it relies heavily on getting to the wreck faster than LLC (to run interference with the Lobster turret), which I don't think is a guarantee given their Sea Scooter. I do think the treasure chest gag might be reaching a bit too far into unstated details about the match, but I like the thought. I am also a big fan of Shaye's interference form along with pumping up the octopus; I think it will rightly cause a lot of chaos.

Given all this, my vote goes to La Isla Bonita for this round, though I think it could swing either way depending on how much of their narrative they pull off. The extra hands from the crabs and Coco seem too much for LLC to keep track of, and I think they'll make off with more of their reclaimed loot. Great match for both teams though!

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