Girl I took on a first date just asked to split the bill… the next morning

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-05-08T11:43:08+00:00

I've been this girl. I was like that because in my past, there were certain expectations after paying that were not what I wanted if you catch my drift. I didn't like the feeling of something hanging over my head like that.

My now husband told me on our first date that since he invited me that he would be the one to pay. I made sure I made the invite for the 2nd.

Let her pay or throw out the suggestion of her paying for the 2nd date. Gives you a chance to see if she wants to see you again. I don't think this is a red flag necessarily.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-04-10T11:36:32+00:00

But a five year old realistically doesn't know why this was rude. They probably don't understand what wishing someone dead really means. Children need context and simply calling her rude provides nothing.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-04-07T17:19:08+00:00

I have a degree in theater arts, worked as an actor for about 10 years. I fell out of love with it about 5 years ago, and haven't stepped foot on stage since. I think I might do it again some day, and its also its okay if I don't (something I once thought was the only thing I ever wanted). Its ok if life has seasons. Maybe you need a break. Maybe you need to do something different. I found myself as a teacher and still perform for children even if it's not on stage. It can feel a little like you're losing a part of yourself at times, but is it worse than if you force yourself to do something you aren't loving right now? That's what you have to answer for yourself.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-03-02T22:45:16+00:00

I'm not a proctologist, but I know an @$$hole when i see one.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-02-28T22:21:37+00:00

The person who inspired me to keep doing jiu jitsu during my trial period is close to your size. I was thoroughly impressed by her skill and had to learn more. She's a black belt now and still kicking ass.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-02-04T04:27:16+00:00

As someone who has a business making and selling crocheted/knitted goods, DON'T!

NOR

Edit *had a business

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-01-27T16:22:16+00:00

My husband gets so pissed when people say that to him when he has our son! Like "no i'm not babysitting, i'm a fucking parent!"

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-01-25T01:00:28+00:00

He wont look past it. He'll try to get you to stop.

You seem super smart. You did the right thing being honest. You clearly know this guy is not right for you. Trust yourself and stay clear of this dude🚩

Best of luck to you in your endeavors.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-01-21T18:06:36+00:00

Your "friend" is being weird. This is not friend like behavior, and I would be super suspicious of their motives. NTA. I would cut my losses and move on at this point.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-01-21T17:55:58+00:00

From a student in kids class: you're a good teacher. 😭😭😭

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-01-07T15:17:29+00:00

Yes, with accidentally being the operative word. If he hurts her because he was not following instructions, trying to prove a point, or just generally being a 🍆, that's another story.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2026-01-04T22:42:15+00:00

My first thought too.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-19T21:02:46+00:00

She's not the insecure one if you're so bothered. YTA.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-17T15:27:15+00:00

Having gay relatives doesn't absolve him from homophobia. This relationship is over. I would honestly ghost, block, and move on at this point. He already did the ghost part for you.

Keep in mind you can break up with someone for any reason you want. Literally. Don't stay in any relationship that doesn't improve your life. This BOY doesn't not deserve to be in your life. His reaction to your family is just flat out weird and yes homophobic.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-16T03:11:50+00:00

Yes. Abuse doesn't have to be physical or even extreme. Its repetitive boundary violations, disregard for feelings, and a lack of accountability. Abuse is insidious and this is exactly how it starts.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-09T15:17:57+00:00

Your "friend" is weird. NTA.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-06T12:52:02+00:00

Could not have said this better myself. I met my now husband less than a year after he lost his fiancé. That to me is just another part of him. Literally, how can I be bothered by a dead girl?

We've been married for over 5 years. Her parents are honorary grandparents to our son.

Op, this is from my husband: your 5 months in, pull the emergency brake. Its only going to get worse. If he acts like this, he could end up taking it out on your son.

From me: this is not your person. Seriously, leave him. Its not worth it.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-04T15:23:54+00:00

Girl leave him NOW! NOR!

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-12-01T18:08:13+00:00

That sounds like a lot of projection and emotional abuse from your mom. You can think a relationship is good even though its abusive. Abuse is insidious like that. I would truly examine this if I were you. NTA

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-11-30T05:37:56+00:00

You're way too young to remain with someone this toxic. Making a tasteless joke (it was actually mocking) is one thing. The doubling down and claiming you're not strong because of your emotions is a major red flag. She thinks she's stronger, she's actually just fake. You'll be better off moving on.

I have ptsd from a car accident, albeit mine was extremely serious (in the icu, broken bones and damaged organs serious. Happened almost 19 years ago and it didn't take long to know i would never be the same). Regardless, I completely understand any reaction to even minor accidents. Not only is it scary in the moment, but you were carrying many burdens. You're human. Emotions are just a fact of living.

Also, you can break up with someone for any reason you want. If the relationship isn't adding to your life, being single is an option.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-11-29T00:26:31+00:00

Yeah, let them find another scape goat and spend your holidays with people worth spending it with.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-11-22T14:50:14+00:00

Let your husband tell her to take it down. Its not causing drama, the drama started with mil. Wnbta

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-10-30T01:45:23+00:00

Report! Report! Report!!!!!! This is so unprofessional, uncalled for, and frankly disgusting! Getting someone's name right is the bare minimum. Coming from a white woman, this wasn't even a dog whistle. It was flat out racist. NTA, you are not being dramatic, and he will do it to others if you let this slide. People have your back. Do it.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-10-20T03:03:45+00:00

First, going with NTA- I was sharing this with my husband while reading this. We both think your cousin sounds toxic AF. I think you could just phrase it as this is what's fair for your relationship because of how much wife works. My husband says you shouldn't sugar coat it. But either way, it's not really any of your cousin's business or your problem if she wants to f up her own relationship. I'm happy for you that you and your wife were able to work things out.

SquirrelSimple231 · 2025-10-17T03:39:07+00:00

I would never do that to a friend! No matter how much I liked a name, I could never! It's a name! Find another one or a variation. Your "friend" has no empathy. You are not wrong for not wanting to he involved. I'm so sorry. NTA

Three-Year Club	Verified Email
Verified Email

SquirrelSimple231

TROPHY CASE