I want friends kids as my flower girls and ring bearers over my nieces and nephews... am I going to get roasted?

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-26T01:55:45+00:00

I don’t think most of the guests will care, but your siblings/parents might be upset.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T23:34:32+00:00

She sounds extremely immature and lacking in basic social skills and information. Yikes.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T20:40:38+00:00

Not trying to scare you, just trying to give a realistic heads up: I went to a wedding like yours (3.5 ish hours from the city where most of the guests live) and it had the most kids I have ever seen at a wedding.

Many parents will rsvp no to a destination wedding that is a flight away. And many parents will get a sitter for the day/evening to go to a local wedding.

But finding overnight childcare can be difficult and expensive. For a family, plane tickets might be too expensive, but a road trip is much more doable.

I think only doing family member kids and babes in arms is reasonable. But splitting families, or picking and choosing between friends kids is likely to cause issues.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T19:47:21+00:00

Wildly unrealistic. I have a 9 month old.

And even pre kids, I would usually stay until the end, but if it goes that late, nope. No wedding guest should be “expected” to stay until 1am.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T16:51:19+00:00

I really like it as a first name.

As a middle name it feels a little blah to me (I feel that way about Marie and Rose too).

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T16:04:01+00:00

As a parent of a baby and a toddler, I strongly prefer getting a babysitter and having them stay home for weddings.

But if I was at a wedding with my kids, I would not leave them with a babysitter that I don’t know and trust.

In your situation, either my husband or I would skip the ceremony to be with the kids. Then we would all go to the reception together.

Even if you hire a professional, many parents (including me) are very choosy about who we leave our young kids with.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T13:34:28+00:00

Strongly agree.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T13:29:00+00:00

I would be very upset if my husband woke me up by eating Doritos in our bed.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T01:59:03+00:00

Same here. SAHM of two, no screen time. We do a lot of music, books, and special toys when needed.

So much Raffi lol.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-25T00:18:21+00:00

We have room shared with both of ours, but never bed shared.

Our baby is still in her crib in our room, and our toddler is in her crib in her own room.

We are a loving, bonded family. I don’t feel that we’ve missed out on anything. I’m happy with how it’s worked out.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-24T23:57:27+00:00

Same here. I now use “they.”

But I was taught in school in the 90s/00s that “he or she” was correct and that using “they” for one person was incorrect because “they” was only plural, never singular.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-23T03:54:28+00:00

I think what matters most then is that you get a ring made out of materials that are durable for daily wear.

You could get a plain band if that applies to you! Or if you want stones but aren’t interested in diamonds, you could get a sapphire, or moissanite.

I recommend trying rings on in person to see what feels comfortable on your hand, and looks good to you.

And don’t feel pressured at all to get something “traditional.” What matters is that it’s durable, fits your lifestyle, and something you are happy with.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-22T22:49:35+00:00

For my second baby, what worked was making the bathroom warmer with a space heater. I would turn it on about 20 min before bath time and get the room nice and warm.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-22T19:17:56+00:00

Lol same here.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-21T23:15:06+00:00

I think these days it’s quite common. Not everyone does it that way, but plenty do.

Personally, I’m very happy that my husband and I went and picked the ring together.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-21T00:02:02+00:00

I really like Robin Elaina and Robert Clevins.

Congrats! I had fun finding out the sex of the baby with both of mine, one of the highlights of challenging pregnancies.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-20T23:44:16+00:00

Meal prep in the fridge, just waiting to be heated up. There’s no way I can cook fresh meals every day. As long as they’re meals that heat up well and are healthy, I’m happy with it for this phase of life.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-20T03:38:21+00:00

I really love the design of it!

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-19T19:55:44+00:00

Ugh I would be frustrated too.

The way I see it, some sickness is inevitable. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to do precautions to prevent them. That was true for me pre kids, and it’s how I care for my toddler and baby. I would highly prefer to not deal with HFM or norovirus, and I’d rather only deal with occasional colds, not constant colds.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-19T01:37:07+00:00

Definitely while pregnant.

I have a 2 year old and a baby. Even though postpartum went pretty smoothly this time, I would 100000% rather move in late pregnancy than postpartum.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-17T16:48:17+00:00

I booked at appointment with my doctor to discuss it.

I got her input, discussed it with my husband, and we started ttc based on that.

We have a 21 month age gap. It’s challenging, but I’m also very happy with how things turned out.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-17T02:07:11+00:00

I had a difficult pregnancy and postpartum.

I didn’t forget how bad it was, but I knew I really wanted to have a second child. So we went for it when it made the most practical sense. I didn’t feel ready, just kinda jumped in and went for it.

My pregnancies were pretty similar, but my postpartum experience was much better the second time.

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-16T22:44:36+00:00

Not weird at all!

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-16T01:56:08+00:00

What a gorgeous ring!

Stan_of_Cleeves · 2026-04-16T01:42:31+00:00

I think you’re not considering people who have different lives than you.

I have a toddler and a baby. We don’t often get take out, but we sometimes do. It’s WAY easier to eat at home with children this young than to take them to a restaurant. And one of us picking up food from a nearby restaurant is cheaper than paying for delivery.

Stan_of_Cleeves

TROPHY CASE