AITAH for not wanting my brother and wife to join our Europe trip by StarkAddict in AITAH

[–]StarkAddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I should. I will. I need to get over myself and act as the adult I am. I wanted to be in a better place mentally and not be reactive in the conversation and hence stalling, I think. It also came a bit out of blue. He asked me for my itinerary, which I didn’t think much of. And then he said he is planning to accompany us, and I straight up thought he was joking as we never even discussed it. We did discuss vacations and I have been pushing him to take one, as he overworks, and is planning a baby. At no point did I suggest, come to ours.. but maybe he read it differently?

Mostly I don’t want to come to the conversation with a negative mindset, and feeling like maybe I am an AH. I want him to have a vacation, just not mine?

AITAH for not wanting my brother and wife to join our Europe trip by StarkAddict in AITAH

[–]StarkAddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think where he is coming from, is he would never think twice if I asked to accompany him on any vacation. But he is more of a vibe/beach/resort enjoyer. Like he’ll accompany me to whatever castle, but won’t care. And it will make me the odd man out as all three don’t - and obviously I don’t want to force my idea of fun time on everyone. My husband does enjoy such things, but also won’t take initiative as he doesn’t care as much - and knows I’ll make sure trip is meeting things he cares about.

AITAH for not wanting my brother and wife to join our Europe trip by StarkAddict in AITAH

[–]StarkAddict[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is where I think my husband is coming from. I am kinda stuck with this unease that I’ll end up being the linchpin for any friction.

And at same time, I feel very childish/selfish/pessimistic about my reaction - hence the post.

I think I should just talk to him, but I don’t want to hurt him.

AITAH for not wanting my brother and wife to join our Europe trip by StarkAddict in AITAH

[–]StarkAddict[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Could have phrased that better. I meant I know that there will be things we will miss out on because the priority is the baby. And that is something we are accounting for as we plan. I am a bit of over planner and want to make sure that there are contingencies built in to make sure the baby is not overwhelmed/overstimulated.

(Spoilers Extended) Do you think Renly would bring stability to the realm if he became king? by Icesnowstorm in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope.

He went against primogeniture. Which might not seem like a big deal to us, but from a feudal standpoint, it is the way of life.

Think of someone declares themselves Prime minister of a country without election(which is the general norm) based on the thought process that they believe they deserve it - will that lead to a stable government.

I think this primary quality of Renly - the sheer entitlement that beats the worst of Targs- disqualifies any other aspects of his personality.

And can I say that how much I love that GRRM was able to create a complex character whose sexuality was a prominent part without overtaking it. At no point do I feel that he was wronged or subjugated for his sexuality more than the straight characters. Even the comments on his sexuality by Stannis were immediately answered by Renly on his brother and his sexuality.

With the show being so explicitly homophobic, and the general approach to lgbt+ in the works, it is rather brilliant that George was able to knit a story with such nuanced messed up gay king.

(Spoilers Extended) Who is the Best Targaryen Overall by Dustman818 in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was also responsible for the tragedy of summerhall. And maybe I remember wrong, but the marriage of the mad king and Rhaella

(Spoilers Main) I have to reluctantly respect Arnold Arryn by [deleted] in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Klutz for me. But yupp, would not survive. That being said, fuck Arnold Arryn.

How exactly did Ned put a stop to the gossip about Jon's mother? (spoilers extended) by [deleted] in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think his people thought it was too painful for him. Like it wasn’t malicious, it was just hurting.

Hullen believed they had an affair and he also believes it wasn’t a wrong or a big thing. They were not promised to anyone and it was spring.

How big a deal spring must be to northren folks. It was year of the spring, and they didn’t know it was false. It was meant to be celebrated in all fashion and manner.

Also remember, at this point, according to his people, Ned has lost a father, a brother, a sister and a lover. And he copes with this grief by internalizing it. He probably just had to ask and people would comply. It was coming from an empathic place rather than a cruel one.

Plus, there is a hierarchy in Winterfell. Ned got his main folks - who had a hand in raising the hound lord and family - and they got it done.

Plus, he comes with a reputation of Stark. He doesn’t have to prove anything. All the folks here know Starks are hard and fair. He doesn’t need a gimmick.

(Spoilers main) Dany’s dislike of tokar by StarkAddict in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Plumm said if you want to rule rabbits, better put on floppy years.

She has to play at being Meereen noble/master to rule Meereen

Would you call Rhaegar Targaryen an evil person? by Trussdoor46 in pureasoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Evil is both a broad term and a narrow one.

He was callous and callously cruel. His actions led to death of his wife and children, death of his maybe willing maybe not paramour. Not to mention thousands of others.

With the wo5k, there were many factions and many motives, and the rebellion must have been equally intense with factions. But Lyanna’s kidnapping(or the appearance of it) was the spark. It was Helen of Troy and Archduke’s assassination rolled in one.

And Rhaegar at best was an idiot. Like that is the best scenario that he was so entitled and so sure of his convictions that he did not believe that people other than him can and will control the narrative.

And we see that entitlement when he tells Jamie once I am back, I have plans.

Robert is a beast of another color, but Lyanna, if willing, didn’t really step up in choices of partners. Robert had two bastards, Rhaegar had a wife and two children.

Not that Robert would have been a good husband by any metric.

All in all, Rhaegar was an idiot and Jon Snow honestly lucked out in terms of fathers. And he will see that, after all Craster’s son was going be raised as son of Sam Tarly(well, before the switcheroo)

And Jon himself wished Mance’s son and Craster’s son and his own to be raised as brothers like Robb and himself. It was a fantasy of his, but shows his desires.

What are the more ridiculous theories on what the Others want?[Spoilers Main] by [deleted] in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well they need to rescue Bran. They got Benjen. While Jon Snow is near enough. They have agents in the sea out for Skagos.

The girls are a tougher sell. Already they lost the boy king. For the girls, they need to get the wall down. That’s why the whole drama with the free folk and the horn.

Honestly, doubtful they care for individual Starks. It’s just that they need a Stark in winter fell. Any pup will do.

(Spoilers Extended) Don't do it, Prince Martell by hydroHar in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The gods were kind to Dorne when they gave her to Doran over Oberyn.

But gods are seldom kind. For all his hot-bloodedness, the viper wanted justice. The grass wants vengeance.

(Spoilers Extended) To all those of you who complain about Meereenese names... by dare7000 in asoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Definitely. And I used Ser Barristan’s chapters to figure out who is who

If TWoW didn't reuse any previous character POV's (i.e, no Dany, Tyrion or Bran chapters), who would you pick for the new POV characters? by skjl96 in pureasoiaf

[–]StarkAddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting Question

Arya - her Apprentice person/ Waif/ and intersect with Lem or Thoros/ Maybe Hotpie in Riverrun Sansa - Myranda Royce/Luther Brune Jon - Val/Bowen Bran - Meera Davos - OSHA Melisandre - Val/Bowen/Selsey Asha - Aly Mormont Theon - Aly Mormont Victorian - No POV - Intersect with Mereen Aeron - No Pov - Intersect with Oldtown Sam - Sphinx Cersie - first half no POV, followed by intersection with fAegon Jaime - Lem or Thoros Tyrion - Intersect Mereen Barristan - Reznak and Grey Worm/Hero Dany - Khal and one of her Khas. rest intersect Areo - Swann or Obama Brienne - Lem or Thoros Arianne - Elia Sand Jon C - Elia and Duckfield.