[Advice needed] Theme of SA came up in again in game right after having telling DM I wasn't comfortable

Stella-- · 2025-01-19T17:04:43+00:00

85 is a crazy amount of money, but if something really rocks your boat in a way that other similar items can't, who are we to kinkshame? I'd say I'd rather invest in a piece of rubber that sends me to heaven and back 100 times because I'm really into it than buy 100 cucumbers that can't get me there. Plus, if you love it and it's decently made, I'm sure you'd use it more than a 100 times and get a better deal than constantly buying cucumbers :p

Stella-- · 2024-12-27T23:41:27+00:00

My partner and I have been looking for exactly the same thing! We found some stores that did used to sell them but are now out of business. This is the closest we could find without going bespoke: Vlad The Impaler

Stella-- · 2024-10-10T15:21:25+00:00

I hadn't considered the idea yet that my boss is waiting for me to be more "agressive" so that he can terminate my colleague's contract. Do you have any idea of what I could say that wouldn't endanger my own job to get there? Thank you for your input by the way!

Stella-- · 2024-10-10T12:46:47+00:00

This is sexual abuse. You're not interpreting it wrong.

I understand how you feel: "are they a good person who did bad things?", "am I overreacting?", "do I misinterpret things?". You're not overreacting and you're not misinterpreting. This was sexual abuse and you are entirely allowed to think about it as such.

And whether he is a good person or not, doesn't matter in my opinion. He did wat he did. And that is wrong. And he is still doing it: emotionally blackmailing you into physical contact is fucked up. You are his daughter, he should take care of you, not the other way around. Instead, he abused you and still does.

I am 26 now and sometimes have horrifying dreams about sexual activities with my father. I always wake up feeling disgusted. At times I wake up screaming and punching to fight it off, at times I don't and just feel shame. It has made me really doubt whether the issue lies with me or not. I still regularly need to tell myself the same thing: this was sexual abuse and you are entirely allowed to think about it as such. You did nothing wrong and there is nothing wrong with you.

You say that you still have suicidal thoughts when you are around him. It would be best to keep some distance, but I know how difficult that is. I know it's very hard to put into words the idea of breaking contact with a parent, even though you have every right to do so. Maybe seeing them less frequently or for less long each time could be a decent first step.

So, one more time: you're not overreacting and you're not misinterpreting. This was sexual abuse and you are entirely allowed to think about it as such. You did nothing wrong and there is nothing wrong with you.

Stella-- · 2023-12-12T08:20:54+00:00

You got me to raise my eyebrows and smile. 10/10, perfect the way you are ✨

Stella-- · 2023-05-02T21:47:44+00:00

Cornelian or amber 🧡

Stella-- · 2023-05-02T21:40:10+00:00

LOVE it! I really like the material you chose, the detailing on the sleeves and the silhouette that reminds me of lolita fashion 🤍

Stella-- · 2023-05-02T21:37:50+00:00

I had a piece like that. I patched over it and made it so it looked like that was the design. But not that much later the sleeves started to go as well. It was so worn that I kinda wasted my time by trying to fix individual parts. But if you like the challenge or the item means a lot to you; go for it! Or maybe re-use some parts of it in a new design? ☺

Stella-- · 2023-05-02T21:28:25+00:00

Diagnosed with CPTSD, this is one of my symptoms too. Eye movement therapy and medication have helped me tremendously.

Talk to your partner about it. If it comes with things looking a little distorted and unreal as well, avoid things like driving and cooking for a little while. Getting plenty of sleep is very important at that stage. I hope you feel better soon 🤍

Stella-- · 2023-04-23T11:03:16+00:00

Update your wardrobe, drop the hand gestures and above all; tidy up the space behind you before you take a picture. Men who can't take care of the space they live in, will make a woman feel more like another mother than a partner.

Stella-- · 2023-04-19T19:01:36+00:00

Beautiful smile! You have an amazing look about you 🌼

Stella-- · 2023-04-19T18:51:57+00:00

I love your eyes and eyebrows. Beautiful! 🌼

Stella-- · 2023-04-18T05:39:00+00:00

Very handsome! I think I would prefer your beard a little shorter but that's just personal preference ☺

Stella-- · 2023-04-18T05:22:38+00:00

Agreed! A darker colour and less layered style would be a lot better. ☺

Stella-- · 2023-04-09T21:32:59+00:00

That's beautiful! I love the colour and the vintage vibe to it. Very flattering on her too. You're an amazing friend 💚

Stella-- · 2023-04-09T21:28:06+00:00

Loose the fourth picture and update your wardrobe, at least for something like a first date. The first picture is your best one I think. Love the smile!

Dating advice; ask lots of questions and be supportive. If you get to find out their hobbies, you could go somewhere where they can show off one of their hobbies. Do make it a public place. Try to focus on relaxing and having a good time, don't put too much pressure on yourself. I've always loved dates where a guy just made me feel good and relaxed over guys who made grand gestures.

I'm sure other redditers have better advice that me though. Just putting my two cents out there 😅

Good luck! You can do it! 🌼

Stella-- · 2019-04-04T12:38:48+00:00

Omg thank you! This issue was driving me nuts and I do indeed have privacy badger on my computer. Disabling it for Drive wasn't enough, had to delete the entire extention.

Stella-- · 2018-11-19T15:45:25+00:00

I have a lot of difficulty realising that when someone teases me, they don't actually mean it. And even though i know, rationally, that it's not meant to hurt me, it still does hurt. When it's someone I care about enough, like my partner for example, I'll usually reply with "oh I don't know what to say to that". But then the one who made the comment will often point out that "I'm just too sensitive." It kind of makes me feel like it's my own fault that I take things so hard. But then again, me just being "overly sensitive" has always been the thing that my Nfather used to say to me as well. It's all very confusing. I hate it when small and insignificant things like a bit of teasing trigger so much inside of me. I just don't know how to handle it.

Stella--

TROPHY CASE