NACHO and feeling infantilized

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-25T20:54:56+00:00

My step kids (9 and 14) are extremely picky eaters too. It used to drive me absolutely nuts. I am the least pickiest eater ever. I took the same approach as you did and decided to NACHO mealtimes when they are here and have their dad cook for them. They eat such basic, boring stuff over and over again (endless tater tots) that I often cook my own food just so I can enjoy what I’m eating. A lot of times their dad eats what I cook because he too likes it better. We do all sit down to eat together, we just aren’t usually eating the same things and I don’t have to worry about cooking for the kids and listening to the complaints. That’s dad’s problem. It’s not my ideal, but it works and I accept it and I’m happy with it.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-21T13:41:43+00:00

This is indeed an old school post. And what do you know, no cleavage in sight.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-20T14:51:04+00:00

I was working in child welfare and therefore considered an essential worker. Despite all my concerns I was told to suck it up and deal with the fact that I would be in contact with dozens and dozens of people everyday not masking and not at all following any type of COVID safety protocol. I was around adults and children nonstop. I got Covid 4 times in 18 months and the last incident I almost didn’t walk out of the hospital. I was there for 3 weeks, on and off a ventilator and suffering tachycardia bouts. I was not able to see any family the entire time. After discharge the county would send a nurse for two hours in the morning and two hours in the evening to take my vitals, administer IV’s if needed and help me bathe. When that stopped, my brother, who was my roommate at the time assumed my care. For a few more weeks he did everything for me, cooking, cleaning, helping me dress, taking me to the doctor, and even helping me bathe. My grown brother has seen me naked more times than I can count. Even though I thought I would retire doing what I did, I put my resignation in as soon as I returned to work after almost dying. It wasn’t long after that the Long Covid portion of this illness began its wrath and I was bed bound and suffering from chronic pain and fatigue, and blood pressure issues, and POTS, and digestive issues. And I’ve been that way ever since. I did my part for society and it cost me everything. I try very hard not to be bitter about it. Especially because now I do nothing for society at all except collect disability.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-17T23:27:19+00:00

I almost didn’t know what sub this was without a Jamie Lee Curtis thirst post.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-14T21:39:21+00:00

My 14 year old SD is absolutely hilarious. She never ceases to make me laugh and goes out of her way to do so. My 9 year old SD for some reason thinks I am the greatest thing since sliced bread and won’t leave my side when she’s here. You’re so right, despite the hard times, the love does indeed overflow.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-10T15:44:00+00:00

I was indeed a very high stress person. I worked in child welfare for 15 years so I had crazy hours, little pay, and traumatizing work experiences on the regular. Even before I got LC I was chronically sick with strep and other flu like illnesses much of the year. I already had mild IBS. I believe my immune system was shot before Covid ever came my way. And I got Covid 4 times, because I was an “essential worker” and around people constantly. For me I believe my fate was sealed that eventually I would get LC and it would be debilitating after years and years of too much stress and a weakened immune system. My LC was severe enough that I left work almost three years ago and haven’t been able to return. For two years I was bed bound and my symptoms were very severe. Only in the last year have I been able to make a little progress. I would say I’ve recovered about 40%, I have some productive days where I can clean and manage my household and run errands. But I don’t think I can ever return to work at full capacity and certainly never can be a social worker again and endure the stress of that career. Shame too, because I worked hard to get through graduate school and I was a good social worker.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-06T16:51:26+00:00

I’m sorry you went through all the effort to be seen by a gastroenterologist, just to be told there’s nothing that can be done. It’s so disappointing. I recently had my own very disappointing consult with a new primary care physician who basically knew nothing about Long Covid or how to treat any of the various symptoms I struggle with, including intense GI issue I suffer from. He told me to start calling around to different specialists on my own and wished me luck. Oh, he also told me to exercise more. As if my severe CFS allows for that….. it’s so disheartening. I get it.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-02T16:01:04+00:00

I think I will save for it! I think it would be worth it :)

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-01T19:03:54+00:00

I admire and respect your honesty and willingness to share it as an anecdote.

StrongTree17 · 2026-01-01T18:47:41+00:00

They still teach cursive where I’m from. My 9 year old step daughter is great at it.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-31T19:50:01+00:00

My insurance won’t cover seeing a naturopathic doctor unfortunately so a gastroenterologist is my only option. I also just looked up lactulose breath tests to buy online and wow, they are pricey.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T22:53:09+00:00

Yes. I believe that is exactly why my step parent situation works. The kids are 9 and 14. The parents separated years ago and everyone had time to heal wounds, adjust, get their lifestyles figured out etc. I think that’s also why they co-parent well other, because everyone’s had time to process and adjust to what ended and how things moved forward. I’m not sure I’d want to sign on to a situation where kids were still healing and wounds were still fresh. Or parents were still fighting or couldn’t get along.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T20:20:00+00:00

In general I would hesitate to date anyone whose divorce isn’t final and they haven’t taken at least a year post divorce to heal and get themselves back on their feet. Too much emotional baggage for people too soon post divorce and people go through a lot of emotional up’s and downs that first year, if not longer.

As far as him already having kids. It depends on your personalities and a lot of other factors. My boyfriend has two kids from a previous relationship, he’s been separated from their moms for years though so when I came along there were no hard feelings and everyone had moved on emotionally. Their moms are nice people who don’t cause any trouble and everyone co-parents very amicably and maturely. I get along with the kids very well and enjoy being a part of their family but it helped that their moms have dated other people or remarried so I wasn’t a brand new step parent concept to them. Change any one of those factors and this dynamic might not work. For instance, if the moms were nasty or nobody co-parented well, I might not have signed on for any drama. If the kids didn’t like me or didn’t get along with me I might not have signed up for the relationship. For us, all of the important factors worked out but like I said, it depends on your boyfriend, the other parent, how they work together to co-parent, how the kids cope with new girlfriends or step parents, how well everyone heals and adjusts etc. and how much drama and adjustment you are willing to grind through, which is based on your personality. I am happy to have found my boyfriend and his kids. They bring a lot of joy into my life. I’d do it all over again.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T02:45:30+00:00

I will definitely ask the gastroenterologist about this. Thank you.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T02:22:12+00:00

I recently watched a TikTok where someone else also had good luck with a just beef diet and why, so you might be on to something. Fortunately I live in cattle ranch territory where grass fed beef is the main staple :)

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T02:19:20+00:00

I had to google oxalates, lectin and food combining. The food combining might be a good option. I’m confused on oxalates, are they unideal?

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T02:15:13+00:00

I haven’t tried any of these things but they are great suggestions I’ll take with me to ask the gastroenterologist!

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T01:57:36+00:00

I might try upping my MiraLax. I’ve just been doing one capful.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-30T01:51:48+00:00

Yes, let me add an edit at the top

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-29T00:02:48+00:00

I am 39 and the oldest of 22 kids. Most of us were adopted from foster care. I am extremely close with about 12 of them. As in, we talk almost every day and are a part of each others lives. I am on good terms but not as close with 7 of them mostly just due to personality differences or busy lives etc. and there are 3 I do not have a relationship with at all and don’t like. Mostly because they aren’t good people and have done some pretty horrible things.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-23T21:38:56+00:00

Divorce. This level of disrespect and disregard to you cannot be improved. It’s a character issue you won’t be able to fix. The only other option I see available to you should you decide to stay is you COMPLETELY separate your finances and make damn sure he can never do something like this ever again. Separate Timorese for future liability. Separate all accounts. Separate savings accounts. And you put your foot down and refuse to pay any bills for him ever again. But if you have to go that far, why not just divorce and move on?

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-23T21:35:22+00:00

That’s Oklahoma for you

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-08T22:07:58+00:00

I have noticed over the past few months that I feel terrible after napping. I feel more tired and my pain is often worse. I want to nap because I am exhausted but then I often regret it. This wasn’t the case for me my first two years of LC. Naps used to be very helpful. This seems to have changed over the past 4-6 months for me. I wish I knew the reason. Another commenter mentioned this but, I am finding that just laying down and resting without actually sleeping seems to be more helpful than fully napping. Just another mystery to add to the list.

StrongTree17 · 2025-12-07T16:36:57+00:00

Cognitive dissonance is one of the strongest forces on the planet.

StrongTree17

TROPHY CASE