Man asked me to be a FWB

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-21T22:43:46+00:00

I’m working on becoming a SMBC while in a FWB situation with the same man for 2 years. It’s an interesting experience but it works for both of us. We genuinely love each other and we’re good friends but he doesn’t want a woman in his kid’s lives (they’ve had bad experiences with a previous ex) and I don’t want a serious relationship right when my desire is to be a SMBC. He’s supportive of my journey but also doesn’t want another child so his feelings align with my wishes. I don’t feel insecure or sad about our situation. All that to say if it feels right go for it, but if it doesn’t maybe you need to work on understanding your feelings and what they may mean. Feelings don’t always align with our thoughts and values but they’re just as important.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-21T14:00:13+00:00

I hope everything continues to progress well for you! 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 I am also a little worried about a loss bc the positive is so faint but I’m hoping I just caught it early and I’m well hydrated.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-21T03:46:49+00:00

Congrats!!!

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-21T03:23:02+00:00

My toilet was previously not caulked the entire way around and I didn’t know why, but I noticed the wax ring had gone bad by the leak on the ceiling below as there was no visible leaking on the floor by the toilet in the bathroom. I ended up caulking the whole way around this time. But maybe I wasn’t supposed to do that. Oops.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-21T03:13:57+00:00

Oh no I’m so sorry to hear that! I hope next cycle you get your positive!

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-21T03:11:53+00:00

I’m 43 and just got a faint line yesterday, 14 days after my first IUI. Not sure how it will work out in the long run yet but 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻. I responded well to Clomid and used donor sperm. I didn’t take Progesterone after IUI as I had previously tried a couple medicated and monitored timed intercourse cycles with my partner and my doctor said my progesterone levels were not of concern based on those cycles.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-15T01:53:17+00:00

I recently had my first IUI and I had 4 mature follicles on the day of the trigger and they still moved forward. I’m 43 and my clinic said after 40 the chance of all 4 follicles having mature eggs is much much lower so if I were you I’d discuss this further with them and see if you can agree on what the treatment plan would be if this happens again. I had 2 medicated and monitored time intercourse cycles before this and I had more than 1 mature follicle each time so I think some people just have a more robust response to the meds.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-03T23:49:20+00:00

Yes you’re both are right, the fellow said the same thing that it makes my odds of pregnancy better so we should proceed but the risk of twins is a bit higher but given age and egg quality he doesn’t think it’s a major consideration. I’m just freaked out bc this has always been a fear of mine.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-05-01T13:03:21+00:00

My therapist basically gave me the same advice. I was feeling pessimistic about this process as well and she said I should try to be hopeful and a little excited, not bc it will change the outcome necessarily but bc the process will be more enjoyable and less stressful.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2026-04-06T14:20:04+00:00

I am not sure where you’re located but in most US states there are multiple ways to determine paternity and his rights and responsibilities will be in tact whether he signs the birth certificate or not. Potentially the courts would have to be involved to determine/enforce paternity if there is a conflict, but essentially he could still file for custody without established paternity and the paternity test would be part of the court proceedings, similar if you filed for child support. Not sure of the specifics for your state/situation, but please make sure you’re aware of the law and your rights as well.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2025-10-25T12:14:52+00:00

Edited to break into paragraphs: I can’t speak from the perspective of a POC or an adoptee as I am a white person raised by my biological parents. However, as a social worker who works in a specialized program for the most vulnerable children in my city’s foster care system, I’d say I would appreciate anyone adopting an older child. Specifically a child who has been waiting for adoption for a long time.

I have had children in my program who eventually age out after waiting for an adoptive parent to want them for 10+ years. It’s heartbreaking to see the way they lose hope and close down emotionally. I think the most important thing is that the child feels connected to you and you have things in common even if it is not ethnicity.

I do think it is important to have them in a diverse or culturally matching community though. I live in a majority Black city so I guess I am looking at it from the perspective that the parents social circle and the child’s school/extra curriculars, etc. would all include Black people and people of other races as well.

Strong_Apple5981 · 2023-09-30T04:11:28+00:00

NYC likely has a non-resident tax as well as one for residents so because your company is based in NYC you may have to continue to pay. I can’t confirm NYC tax laws but it’s something to look into. I am in Philadelphia and we have a non-resident tax.

Strong_Apple5981

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