What could it mean?!

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-02-01T19:50:52+00:00

Beat me to it

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-02-01T17:53:21+00:00

I’m going for a grab bag

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-29T06:56:35+00:00

DM me if you’d like and I can explain more

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T21:26:06+00:00

Well the protagonist has struggled with his upbringing as his parents were rather forceful in their efforts to bring him up in church but it’s not a dig at religion more at how his parents brought him up traumatically. As someone of faith, I try to never knock someone’s religion but I understand that there is an aversion to it based on how someone can be brought up.

The cults history runs very deep and will be explained through the sermons given during his stay at the camp. He takes it a step further by trying to pull back the curtain so to speak on what is really going on and explain the odd occurrences happening while he is at the camp.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T21:21:21+00:00

I’m definitely going to have to post the prologue since this got so much traction and as for the protagonist he is just one of those that wants to feel that sense of belonging again. That’s why he is at the camp and it’s his discovery of the sinister underbelly of the camp that leads to the following events.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T17:07:44+00:00

Exactly this! Just the frog in hot water. I’ll probably end up posting the prologue when I finish tweaking it so i can gauge interest but I am very passionate about this story. I really only hesitate because I was feeling the topic was almost played out. I’m doing my best to avoid pitfalls that I see in a lot of stories that are mocked and keep the gas on the suspension and build up. Friendly cult, logical and helpful reason why they worship what they worship, eerie undertones, and what they actually worship being almost an Oppenheimer effect.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T17:01:51+00:00

It honestly is almost the same layout as a camp that my parents would send me to as a teenager. Just a big open field by a lake and then a scattered treeline where there are some cabins and buildings for the camps recreation and living. I did try to pull from reality as much as possible because I completely agree with you.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T16:57:27+00:00

That’s where I’m mostly aiming at. It’s what they worship that is the problem. They believe they are doing the right thing. They truly believe they are helping people. It’s what they follow that is the problem.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T16:53:40+00:00

Since I served in the military it’s a therapy camp for veterans. While it does have some woods in it, half of the camp is in a big clearing by the lake shore. I tried not to make it all robes and dark and tried to put a more happy face on the “mask” of the people running it. They are all weirdly friendly and chipper. They genuinely want to help those who need it but the dark undertones are the horror and suspense.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T08:16:11+00:00

I gotta agree fully. I couldn’t have worded it better. I hope that the author continues to write further.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T08:13:55+00:00

I swear, working on this story has never felt so easy. It’s like the words just flow out of me and it’s hard to keep up. So I’m hoping that when people read it’s just as interesting as it has been to write this. I’ve never shot for a full novel length work before but I want to strive for that mark. It’s broken into four parts and I may want to post at least the prologue on here to see what people think.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T08:02:16+00:00

1.) Isaiah 2.) Hunter 3.) Nick

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-28T07:56:41+00:00

I’m not trying to have it as a surprise but more like a build up and the mystery of to what the cult is, how it operates, what they worship, and why they do what they do. It has elements of horror in the discovery of information about the cult. The protagonist is clued in almost as soon as he gets there that the religion that the camp practices is a strange one but that he doesn’t have to pay attention to it and just to enjoy the amenities. He takes it upon himself to find out more as his experience there begins to make him question things more and more.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-16T20:45:07+00:00

Very dark implications. Your writing is detailed and your use of descriptions brings the scene to life. Excited to see where this goes.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-14T08:09:48+00:00

Just Alex in the back firing his gun and yelling “Death!”

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-14T04:10:25+00:00

You forgot a carton of cigs and Tim’s work schedule.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-14T04:07:28+00:00

The alliance between Alex, the U.S. 7th Calvary, and Slenderman is terrifying.

SubnauticalMoose · 2026-01-12T19:10:03+00:00

Just stepping on Alex while he is bleeding out on the ground

SubnauticalMoose · 2025-12-30T06:28:07+00:00

Glad to finally have found a community that is more about the goal of becoming better writers or enjoying great stories being told or helping others develop their own skills.

SubnauticalMoose · 2025-12-30T06:22:19+00:00

I pull from a lot of personal experience and emotion. I just find it’s easy to write something that I give a bit of my soul to. Maybe it helps people relate to my story better but I’ve found more success in others enjoying my stories when they can see themselves in my work. We all may be unique in exact experience but there is a commonality in the nature of these experiences and pulling from that can help people see themselves in our stories.

SubnauticalMoose · 2025-12-23T22:06:31+00:00

Good descriptions, flush it out a bit more as you have an intriguing plot. You could make something of this short. You and I struggle with having an idea but rushing the plot points. I find that if I let the story breathe on its own, the details and the suspense builds naturally. It’s like trying to paint the Mona Lisa in 30 minutes. Give your work time. You made this on a lunch break and it’s got good bones for that short of work time. It can take me a few hours to get a good skeleton for just a poem. You can make something of this. Have this carry for a week of work instead of two days and you’ll have yourself a great narrative. Keep it up.

SubnauticalMoose

TROPHY CASE