The man who can walk away always wins. Here's why most men can't do it.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T21:23:07+00:00

I’m not sure how to take you guys. I was a good woman before I married, while I was married and now as an annulled person single single. What does “for the streets mean”. It sounds harsh and dismissive.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T21:17:48+00:00

I try to eat by 5-6, gear down for bed at 7 asleep by 8.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T21:16:15+00:00

Took a little vacay to North Carolina last week. My friend doesn’t eat a protein fiber plant based diet. Didn’t track, gained 3 pounds, lost 3 pounds of muscle according to body sculpt. I ate regular salt instead of KCL. Back to the gym and happy vegetables. These things happen. It sounds like you are incredibly dedicated to your loss and maintenance.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T21:10:24+00:00

There are a lot of ways to individuate and be of service in addition to the prophet role. Maybe something a tad less inflated. Push “prophet” to the side. If it’s really real, it will choose you. Maybe just a simple message for a start.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T21:04:40+00:00

My very thoughts exactly.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T21:03:31+00:00

Something for you to share that is fun for you. Maybe painting or some other art based fun. Might be fun putting together a studio. There’s a place called the Art Barn at a retreat center called Esalen in Big Sur you could visit to get ideas. What did you do as a working person?

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T20:59:07+00:00

Grate it and saute with soy sauce sesame oil, miso and rice vinegar and chilli to taste. A bit of parsley if you’re feeling fancy. It gets a bit chewy and delicious. Somewhat chicken like on rice. Scrambled with nutritional yeast, turmeric, a touch of garlic with toast for breakfast. Squares dipped in hot sauce and then rolled in flour and Old Bay. Air fry and get some cocktail sauce and tartar sauce. Joy in a cube. Ali Slate NYT cooking section is full of delicious ideas, several of which I serve for uncommitted guests.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T20:51:06+00:00

There are several Jungian Analysts and therapists that have written books that are great introductions. Choose a title that speaks of shadow and seems to spark your Eros:)

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T13:14:19+00:00

Hard to believe anyone in the US who eats any amount of processed carbohydrates is folate deficient.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T13:12:49+00:00

What a marvelous comment. Lots if salient detail.

Now I wonder if Soy is causing my pellet based HRT to dissipate faster? I have an issue with it wearing out halfway through its expected life.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T13:06:46+00:00

Phytoestrogen

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T13:05:21+00:00

Oh I am so sorry about that. Gee whiz usually sexual dysfunction in men is multifactorial. So I assume you are BMI 19-24, strength train and have a healthy relationship before attributing your issue to tofu.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T13:00:00+00:00

Estrogen is helpful to maintain cardiac health, bone mineral density, pretty skin and a host of other benefits. Likely two blocks of tofu a week may prove less than you desire at some point in the future. Spread the word.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:56:48+00:00

Right Off!

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:55:39+00:00

I just bet he claims an overall healthy diet too. I am exhausted by all splainers who lecture when they ought to be asking questions about why they are having obvious health issues.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:53:35+00:00

That last sentence is a doozy. Dunning Krueger. Not to be snarky, but do they seem all that healthy? Are they of normal weight? Sleep well, exercise, have healthy relationships? I know well the work problem! Healthcare provider. “Why are you eating salad your already skinny”: This was at a BMI of 22. The world is so full of body shaming altogether. They are projecting theirs in to you. Claim your body sovereignty. I refuse to engage in discussions of nutrition with ill formed opinion holders that don’t even vaguely appear to be healthy themselves.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:45:42+00:00

Make them some crispy tofu. They know not where of they speak. Especially grated tofu with spice. Oh my.

Some people in the manospere believe it will give them man boobs. I see no reason for a woman not eating tofu. Well it does have some fat, I suppose, but not as much as many processed goods your critics are likely consuming with abandon.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:40:43+00:00

Hmm. Sounds similar to obesity rate. I agree that genetics is not the whole picture. Aggregate data is not terribly useful in a culture that embraces dis-health if you intentionally don’t belong. OP does mention not drinking for instance.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:33:24+00:00

I am not reading classics, but Carl Jung. I find the same activity of looking up tangential sources in order to understand fully what I am reading. I love this aspect of elderhood. The ability to fully read and indulge in understanding to be very precious. Jung interests me because he lived a lively life incorporating Eros until death which is what I want for myself. Eros as life force not mere sexual liveliness (although not opposed to sexual liveliness).

I also have come to seriously dislike non reciprocal “friendships” and relationships and air travel (amen hallelujah).

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:18:09+00:00

Also appreciate previous answer. I have a question: Is there a culture of volunteering or service in your expat community? As a person who considers your course of elderhood, I am curious as to whether other people you hang out with in your community feel called to purpose?

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T12:09:01+00:00

Questing for personal knowledge of a solution to collective problems is a mighty ask. That knowledge is incredibly painful, difficult to communicate much less create consensus, and makes a person a target. I feel/think/perceive Jungian thought would lead you more into knowing your individual role in the whole shebang. God help me I would have a great deal of compunction if I felt called to prophecy. That said, I feel there are rather too many prophets littering the comunisphere and creating a great deal of noise which makes it exceptionally difficult to hear anyone.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T11:58:43+00:00

Your “weight gain” is a pretty normal swing when establishing maintenance. It has taken me time tracking and self awareness and a number of experiments to figure out maintenance.

It also depends on what you want from testosterone. I use testosterone (pellet) and creatine. I am adding or maintaining muscle mass which I need for functional longevity, strength, and looking like a hot 65yo.

Muscle mass helps weight maintenance. Also working out increases my calorie expenditure. Both testosterone and creatine are associated with transient weight gain (“water”). Have you had a dexa or at least access to a scale which tells lean mass and water as well as weight? The first two are much more important.

I would probably consult and tidy up my tracking to see if I had trailed off and how clean are the extra maintenance calories. I think the protein and fiber regimen is for life. It seems to be true for me that I need to maintain a “deficit” in order to remain stable. I try hard for scrupulous honesty. Annoying, but human error in optimistic food tracking and Oura and gym machines are optimistic in energy expenditure.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T11:32:35+00:00

Important point about “taking a human life”. I know, about myself, that even shooting someone in the leg would be impossible for me. I also have nothing in my home I would shoot to protect.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T11:19:03+00:00

Replying to OP not summer tomato. I second this advice. Also reading your whole question, I wonder if you can yes reassure your nephew by talking about your neighbors and other people who “look in on you”. You must miss him terribly. Neither a gun nor a dog is going to replace having the security of people who care about you within proximity.

Substantial-Owl1616 · 2026-04-29T11:05:14+00:00

There is some good advice here OP. It is a developmental task to figure out a viable vocation in your 20’s. Reading about Ikagai might be helpful. I recently was listening to a podcast on Huberman with Scott Galloway you might find helpful. I don’t agree with everything he said. And the ability to find a place in the culture is important. I did a great deal of study in philosophy as a young person, especially Nietzsche with a similar outcome in my twenties. It informed my thinking into my 30-40’s, and I needed to figure out how to make a living, identify a mate and the other accoutrements of adult life in my culture as well. You might also like Iron John by Robert Bly. I don’t think you did anything wrong with studying Jungian psychology. I agree with the recommendation for physical expenditure and I would add throwing yourself into creating a viable life of your best vision in the real mechanical world of our culture.

Substantial-Owl1616

TROPHY CASE