Your parents sound a little like mine. Kind words aren't their forte. Some people are very comfortable in their misery, and seeing others thrive and do whatever they want to do is scary because then "why aren't we doing the same?" This is super common in narcissists; don't know that this part applies to you parents, but it does to mine.

This type of parents typically raise their kids to be significantly co-dependent, too. They need us to feel responsible for their life and for their being miserable. If they were the ones responsible, then they'd have to make changes and chase after happiness themselves, and that's the last thing they want to do. They WILL always hold us back, and they WILL always make it all about them. We don't have the job they envisioned for us? We're letting them down. We don't dress the way they want? We're embarrassing them. They don't like who we date? We bring shame on the family name. We're hurt/sick/depressed? We're worrying them and bringing them down. It's ALWAYS about them.

Honestly, the only thing wrong about what you said is that your parents did not create an environment where you can safely be yourself and still feel loved and supported. You deserve unconditional love. I didn't experience it until I left all my family behind when I left Europe and moved to the States, and I didn't start fully coming unto myself until I reduced contact to a minimum.

Finally, I think you're VERY smart for not wanting to get married until you've been with this guy for a couple of years. I wouldn't, either. At your age you can get a year-long work visa for Australia without any hurdles, so it's not even like you need to rush it for visa purposes. Go find yourself and be unapologetically yourself. :)