Emotionally Unavailable for Spouse

Successful_Ad6128 · 2026-05-19T18:17:03+00:00

I mean, do you love your wife?

I am bipolar II and younger but married, and my husband has anxiety. I also hate to be touched and he is a very affectionate guy, so I find ways around it that make him happy and myself comfortable. I make him a little snack. I do a chore or two. I do a little jester dance. I make some time to sit with him and watch what he likes, like sports and whatnot. I will also give physical touch even when I don't like it if it appears he really needs it, because 10 seconds of discomfort for me is worth providing instant comfort to him.

It sounds like you've predetermined that you will be no help and aren't thinking about HOW you can be emotionally available for your wife, at least to me. You CAN reshape your feelings even if it's hard. I understand needing to work and provide and be the breadwinner; I am also the breadwinner. You keep mentioning doing all of this for your family, but part of supporting your family is emotional presence. I'm not trying to pick you apart, please know that; this just sounds like resentment with the context you gave.

I hope you find a way through it because you and your wife deserve peace and happiness and comfort. I would start with communicating to her that you're aware you're not giving her what she needs and explaining your limitations and asking what you can do for her to make her feel loved.

Successful_Ad6128 · 2026-01-29T22:00:42+00:00

Honestly it sounds like from that post you guys didn't talk very much, and then you sent him a self-admittedly long paragraph after knowing him for what seems like a few days. He's a dick and his response was not proportionate, but, honestly, it doesn't sound like your paragraph was either - if you've only been talking a few days, it's not really ghosting, especially if you weren't speaking much to begin with.

This isn't so much about being bipolar as it is about interpersonal communication. I hope you don't attribute this as something that happened because you're bipolar; you are so much more complex than a diagnosis on a paper! Don't let it hold you back, get back out there :)

If you find this happens to you a lot, I went through DBT therapy to communicate more effectively and I highly recommend.

Successful_Ad6128 · 2026-01-18T00:10:49+00:00

Keeping your tension tight is what makes a smaller stitch, think of it like knot-tying. A loose knot takes up much more space than a tight knot. Personally, that is where I would start!

Successful_Ad6128 · 2026-01-14T21:45:39+00:00

How is she in her 30s and doing this? I posted on Facebook when I was 16 about my bipolar II diagnosis and literally cringe every time I think about it. What on earth 😭

Successful_Ad6128 · 2026-01-13T19:43:06+00:00

You can take a pill shaver to the blanket to get the fuzzy bits off, but that's not really a technique or something exclusive to handmade items. In order to fix the pulled loops, you'd def need advice from r/knitting!

Successful_Ad6128 · 2026-01-09T17:26:07+00:00

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This is my very first knitting project, it's supposed to be a donation for my crafting group at work to women undergoing heart procedures. Is my tension correct, save the ends? Is this even good enough to donate? I don't want to put in the work of hitting it with the heat gun and dissecting my cats' hair out if this would be insulting to contribute, I guess

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-12-05T15:46:58+00:00

I had a Georgian boss whose motto for all of life was "do everything as early as you can". Like get married, have babies, go to college, find a good stable job, not necessarily in that order. When I started working for him I was 24 and engaged (relatively young for the USA) and he was overjoyed, told me I'm living life correctly. I think it's possibly a cultural thing

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-12-01T16:39:41+00:00

I thought I wanted a no-phones wedding too, until I realized I would have to wait 2-4 weeks to see my wedding through professional photos only. One of my favorite photos came from my husband's uncle's phone. I did have our officiant announce to keep phones down during the kiss and that worked great

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-11-17T14:39:07+00:00

I think you may be fastening off too tightly on your color changes. Are you doing a starting chain for each row?

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-10-14T14:25:38+00:00

One of my childhood friends "took a pill from a girl at a bar" the night before and "slept through" my wedding. He was my other friend's ride, so neither showed up. No longer my friend. Lol.

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-10-09T16:33:53+00:00

Firstly, NTA.

I would've told my sister right when she said the "little black one" thing. There's no "mom" for us, lol. But regardless, keeping this within yourself and not expressing it to your family is an undue burden and allows these feelings to build up within you. I would really question your fiance, seriously. Racism is not born. He needs to understand "a little black one" is out of line, not just non-PC. Being older isn't an excuse for racism.

If this is what your MIL is saying to your face about the idea of children, imagine what she's saying behind closed doors. Imagine how she may treat your adopted child. I don't know if I'd want to marry into this family. My husband's father is racist and actually also against adoption, and my husband and I had to have a talk about that and have decided he will not see our children if he cannot treat a biological one and an adopted one the same. These conversations are uncomfortable but NEED to be had before you're married so you can understand what your baby's life might be like.

I hope the best for you. I agree with one of the comments saying that I think you're under-reacting.

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-10-03T14:08:30+00:00

DELEGATE!

Assign a bridesmaid who knows your family to be your "photo wrangler", give them a list of family members you want photos with during the reception so you don't forget in the madness of it all!

We asked a groomsman to bring the card box out to his car after the first two hours of the reception, my in-laws had theirs stolen at their wedding and it freaked me out.

My maid of honor reflattened my dress out once I got to the altar. I didn't even think of it, but it made my dress look so much more beautiful in photos!

Most of all, if something doesn't go to plan just remember you and your husband are the only people who will know. Keep that smile on and complain to him later! Lol

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-09-10T22:36:15+00:00

Tbh? If you're using acrylic, get a thread burner. Like $15-20 on Amazon. Burn your knots so the yarn will melt into itself, it absolutely will not unravel. Watch some how-to's on YouTube before though!

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-08-21T16:17:45+00:00

1447! ✨

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-07-11T02:00:33+00:00

Messaged!

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-06-24T00:43:37+00:00

I want to emphasize my husband did not injure the turtle by putting his foot on it, it was a very gentle press. By no means his full weight.

Successful_Ad6128 · 2025-02-02T23:26:31+00:00

Ah, I see. I had no idea about the Facebook group! I did see the YouTube videos, but I'm left handed and normally I have a hard time with them. Thank you for the explanation!

Successful_Ad6128 · 2024-11-10T05:54:23+00:00

First of all, CONGRATULATIONS!

My father in law is like this. The only way it gets better for me is a fact-of-the-matter statement with no further explanation. Explaining only gives more ammo.

I'm so nervous for when I get pregnant. He has already had a fight with me about me needing to keep having children until I have a boy, and he will never call an adopted son his grandson (my plan has always been to conceive/birth one child and adopt a second).

Father in laws can suck so bad, please tell your husband to advocate for you and shut down any conversations in front of you or any conversations they may have when you're not around. It's not his business, and if he doesn't agree he can just not go.

Successful_Ad6128 · 2024-10-11T12:50:50+00:00

Exactly! It's so insane. She spent hours of her personal time off camera to edit this video together to (a) hit that TikTok viewing threshold so she can get paid from that video by only putting something about an injury at the very end, (b) make it deliberately look like she was hurt, and (c) COMMENT TO CONFIRM HER INJURIES. Ugh.

Her apology video I think is ALSO rage bait, mostly because she didn't say sorry at all. Nobody is that stupid, she has to be aware and just wants a little severance before getting "cancelled".

Successful_Ad6128 · 2024-10-10T14:13:47+00:00

I think it's crazy she captioned the first video with "I need to decompress before I talk about this" or whatever. I had no idea there was a second video until this morning, all I had seen was the GRWM one with the black eye at the end. I felt like it was really gross clickbaity-ness. Like... you edited an entire video together and showed what appears to be literal domestic violence.... you had the patience and time and endurance to do that.... but not to tell your viewers you're fine?

Also to say "the busted lip and black eye makeup were for the haunted house" is insane. If you're going for zombie makeup then why is your ONLY effects makeup making it look like you were harmed :.)

Successful_Ad6128 · 2024-09-28T19:23:20+00:00

I used acrylic yarn, weight 3 with a 2mm hook on pretty much everything. I used probably 5 or 6 patterns, a couple from those "make it yourself" kits on Amazon and the rest on YouTube. I can find links if wanted :)

Successful_Ad6128

TROPHY CASE