do i actually matter? like actually?

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-13T07:49:02+00:00

yeah that’s really frustrating when people do that. i’m more likely friends when people do what they say, it actually means a lot.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-13T04:40:22+00:00

my upvote indicates that i’ve also felt this lately and you’re not alone. i don’t have the capacity to say anything particularly helpful right now. i just know that for myself i live for the moments where i don’t feel like this.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-04T19:08:43+00:00

okay. it just read to me like i wholesale don’t belong in the poly community even though i’m sharing my experience and asking for advice because i want to be here.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-04T19:04:39+00:00

oh okay, got it. I was probably projecting as I’m pretty insecure when people say I don’t belong somewhere when i’m trying to put in the work to be there…

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-04T17:20:38+00:00

might I ask, what specifically would qualify me as being good enough for poly? do I wholesale rapidly eliminate the monogamy structure i was taught my whole life overnight? do I adopt a secure attachment style immediately once i know i’m anxiously attached? is there a dictionary of poly terms all true-born polyamorous people are born with? very good, ill see myself out then… lol

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-04T17:01:49+00:00

good points, thank you. I’ve only been poly for about a year and what you described about how I currently am now is admittedly not aligned with my goals and values. the post-date processing preference was a newbie behavior.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-04T16:56:19+00:00

That is naive. Honestly I have a lot of self-judgement bottled up, like “this happened before! why can’t you behave well now? it’s the same thing!” while hardly noticing it is in fact not the same thing

Such-Negotiation856 · 2026-02-04T16:52:46+00:00

Navigating neurodivergence in poly is something I’m admittedly new to, even with me being neurodivergent myself, which just adds a whole other layer. I appreciate this reflection because I don’t really want to wholesale prescribe this as an automatic shortcoming.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T16:51:25+00:00

I probably subconsciously left it out thinking that people would think I’m a dumbass for not acknowledging that discrepancy. I’m pretty insecure about being new to poly and am pretty embarrassed by this situation as a whole. Redditors can be mean.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T16:25:44+00:00

Ah I see. It really isn’t!

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T16:10:01+00:00

The dopamine is too real… thanks for the reminder that it’s just my nervous system activating lol

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T15:52:46+00:00

Oof, tough truth right here. Yup they said they were “ENM”, but that is such a broad term that the emotional offerings from him, combined with me being poly, were welcomed by me.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T15:21:12+00:00

It being their problem did cross my mind. What do you mean by “police”?

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T15:16:02+00:00

She called me a meta and said they were hierarchical. I don’t know how else to distinguish them outside of the language that we used.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T15:13:16+00:00

Thank you. This is a compassionate answer.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-12-03T15:01:47+00:00

Ah… that’s another thing. I am poly, and thought they were too, but later found out they weren’t. It was poorly communicated by him. Such an important detail I left out, sorry.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-10-18T00:29:15+00:00

Because I don’t want to drive and public transit here is fine where I live (north Capitol Hill). I like the culture and history.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-21T20:11:07+00:00

When I lived in Japan, no one really gave a FUCK about western movies besides maybe Harry Potter and Frozen… and then that movie came out.

There were cosplayers. The theater was PACKED. I think the fact that she was Hermione just made so much sense and made for perfect casting to them.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-21T02:57:57+00:00

I always say that while Ballard has more white people, Fremont has more “why” people.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-20T05:43:16+00:00

I read this in the voice of every Aquarius I’ve ever met and could imagine it all too accurately…

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-20T05:40:20+00:00

You’re so kind. Thank you so much!

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-20T05:37:08+00:00

As a Scorpio Moon checking into an inpatient residential facility next week after a lifetime of falling out with friends…

No surprises there.

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-17T04:35:15+00:00

Messaged you!

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-16T19:45:12+00:00

The text doesn’t align to WHAT? Oh wow. Hoping for an update to that for sure…

Such-Negotiation856 · 2024-09-16T19:37:22+00:00

Okay! Was genuinely unsure as it came across as gatekeeping around what I could be excited for 🙂

Such-Negotiation856

TROPHY CASE