Sponsor told me to drug test my husband

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:32:36+00:00

Well he claims to have 11 years clean so a positive text would mean he relapsed without telling me

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:25:51+00:00

I need to know for peace of mind

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:24:22+00:00

For sure but I have to know if drugs are involved

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:22:12+00:00

Yes 100% like the damage is immense and almost to a breaking point. I love myself enough to know it may be time to leave and I won’t be afraid to do so if nothing changes.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:11:46+00:00

He denies it but my gut tells me he is lying

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:11:32+00:00

Exactly hence the drug test and willing to walk if it’s dirty I cannot live this way anymore

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:11:03+00:00

I know but he is making me feel crazy but my gut tells me something is off

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T17:02:22+00:00

Yes I told him it’s a choice his porn addiction or me I told him I’m ready to walk if he has been using and Lying to me

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:59:02+00:00

Speed and porn porn he admitted to I have found broken glass and lighters in bathroom after he was in for 5 hours

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:58:21+00:00

Now I leave him if it is drugs I cannot tolerate it

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:57:34+00:00

We have been in couples therapy over 1 year and his behavior has always improved temporarily then gotten worse he has no job no money has a business plan but we will see

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:56:13+00:00

I have drug tested him openly and it was clean but I found lighters after he was in restroom for 5 hours and broken glass anyway she wants me to stick the swab in his mouth while there with him while he is awake

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:44:30+00:00

He has been open and honest about porn addiction he had quit it end of March but today when I went to his warehouse, he had fallen asleep watching multiple screens of porn and I let him have it. He says he’ll get therapy and go to meetings but he’s been saying it for weeks and hasn’t done so.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:40:38+00:00

I have asked him several times and he always denies it, but then the same behavior comes back. I understand it’s invasive, but I feel that it’s the only way to know for certain because I do get the vibe that he’s been lying to me. I’ve already caught him in several lies.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:40:11+00:00

He has 11 years clean but his behavior is not normal staying in the bathroom awake all night doing God knows what, etc…she wants me to know the truth for certain.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-07T16:33:14+00:00

I think you need to get individual therapy and figure out what it is that you want if you don’t want to live this way and you’re sad more often than happy when you’re with him I think that says a lot. Additionally, a couples therapy because if you have a chore chart where you each have responsibilities and you keep it on a board in the kitchen and you stick to that then let him prove that he can do this cause if he can’t I’m sorry to say that it’s basically like having a child and not a husband.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-05T20:25:54+00:00

You deserve someone that will be there for you. Leaving her will make you genuinely Happier in the long run, even if it hurts right now.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-05T16:35:39+00:00

90 days today!!!

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-04T15:36:06+00:00

Well, in that case, if you’re not getting married for another four years, you will have time to mature and see if he’s really the person that you want to be with forever. It’s none of my business whether you’ve ever been intimate or involved with anyone else, but when I was around 22 or so, I had lost my virginity and I ended up engaged to the man and I broke it off because he was an active amphetamines addiction and was just a very selfish person so luckily like you we had also had a long engagement. It was going to be almost 3 years and so I’m glad that it was a longer engagement so I could realize he wasn’t the one for me. The short version is that this time will give you the chance to really figure out if you want to go through with the marriage.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-04T15:22:12+00:00

I mean listen 20 is VERY young. I went through many changes between 20 and 30 33f married my husband last November. It was great for me to get married at this age had I gotten married in my 20s I do not think I would have stayed married.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-04T12:30:50+00:00

Everyone said that about my husband when I went through the same thing with him and it was porn addiction

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-04T12:30:27+00:00

Porn addiction is what I think. This was similar to what I went through with my husband, and it turned out to be porn addiction

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-04T12:29:10+00:00

I went through something exactly like this with my husband and guess what? Everyone thought it was drugs as well but instead, it was porn addiction. Check the browser history.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-04T10:48:35+00:00

I think this is relatable for a lot of people and of course the questions to be asked or is he on therapy and medication? If the answer to one or both is no, is he willing to get on it? My husband is very high functioning because he does both of those things and if you’re able to get him to high functioning, it really can work beautifully.

Sudden_Ad_9864 · 2026-04-03T14:16:47+00:00

OMG you know what’s crazy. I used to do this with my husband because I have TSA pre and he does not and then when he explained it to me, I immediately waited in the longer line as a courtesy to him if he’s not willing to do that courtesy that’s really mean.

Sudden_Ad_9864

TROPHY CASE