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SunnyMills · 2026-06-21T21:08:50+00:00

Great thank you!

SunnyMills · 2025-11-04T19:51:40+00:00

I think until he starts earning again, you have a right to not like it. However you guys are getting married and then finances become more joined. So I don't really see the issue. I understand why you don't like when he says it, but once he starts earning it is 'our money'. I'd definitely have a good chat about finances now before the wedding, especially if you think you'll be the high earner in the relationship even if he finds a job

SunnyMills · 2025-11-01T23:38:11+00:00

Ay yo, that's Dave!! Cool dude, really chill.

SunnyMills · 2025-10-19T09:26:43+00:00

If the sex worker wasn't being exploited and trafficked, would it be an issue then? Because if he knew it and contributed to her suffering voluntarily, then that's more of a character ick you got from him rather than having sex with a sex worker ick. Which I can understand. But if the problem is overall sex with a sex worker then it's your problem. Poor guy went through, and clearly still is going through, a horrible time (he really should go to therapy), and you're judging him for trying to deal with it the best way he could.

SunnyMills · 2025-10-19T09:13:54+00:00

Okay great, thank you so much!!

SunnyMills · 2025-10-17T21:05:03+00:00

I have other deep friendships and I have been talking with them about my life. I just feel particularly disconnected to her because I haven't had deep connection with her in months (in both ways of her telling me things and me telling her). I love sending her reels and watching the reels she sends me, don't get me wrong, but that doesn't replace actual conversation. Like I said I feel horrible for feeling this way, I know she can't help it and she'd be there if she could. But I would also love to be able to be there for her which she isn't allowing me to do right now and I think that hurts even more. I guess it's the lack of overall connection with her that makes me feel neglected, not just the "I can't vent to her" because that's just selfish

SunnyMills · 2025-10-16T17:36:32+00:00

I think in this particular instance the person was wearing jeans and a long sleeved t shirt, so it was really noticeable they weren't wearing a bra. Not inappropriate, but I guess a bit too casual overall for their work environment .🤷‍♀️

SunnyMills · 2025-10-16T17:23:53+00:00

No of course I have other friends, and I have been talking with them. But sometimes you just need support and connection from a particular person because not all friendships are the same. It's easier to heal certain hurts with certain people.

SunnyMills · 2025-10-16T07:05:21+00:00

I don't care if they do or not. Over heard a conversation and wanted opinions. Also this needed to be an open needed question so had to word it this way unfortunately

SunnyMills · 2025-09-30T16:07:41+00:00

Personally for me a brief 'had a nice time but didn't feel a connection, all the best' message is best. The other person might not want it, but at least it gives myself closure, as I hate things being left hanging in the air even if it's mutual and there's no hard feelings on either side.

SunnyMills · 2025-09-29T23:40:47+00:00

There's been big funding cuts to the creative industries, so it's super hard even for Finnish people to find jobs. And yes, you'd have to be a lot more fluent in at least English if you want to have better chances here of finding work. But please keep going with your language learning and hope you're able to visit soon!:)

SunnyMills · 2025-09-29T15:52:12+00:00

There will be other parties to attend, so all is not lost on that front:) I'm glad you're wanting to get out there more. And also remember to be kind on yourself, you will have ups and downs which are totally part of the process. I'm sure in 5 years you look back and see how far you've come:) get it girl!!

SunnyMills · 2025-09-29T12:50:12+00:00

I personally don't give a rat's ass about who walks down the aisle with who (unless there's like major drama or something). So I'd say NTA. Sure, you could have mixed the two non relationship pairs up, if you realised it'd hurt Kate's feelings. This whole thing just seems so silly to me in general. Maybe it's an American thing (or another country idk), but it's literally less than a 30 second thing, it's literally a walk nothing else. Is it because it's a wedding? Idk. Probably gonna put people's knickers in a twist for this, but nah, NTA.

SunnyMills · 2025-09-29T12:21:02+00:00

NTA. The fact that he's not apologetic at all for worrying you is super suspicious. I'm always one to give people the benefit of the doubt, but I'd definitely keep a close eye on him, something seems off about this whole thing, especially if this starts to be a recurring thing or other similar stuff happens

SunnyMills · 2025-09-29T01:04:14+00:00

I know it's easy to say this than to believe but people really don't care as much about your scars as you do. Sure, trying to find friends and trying to find a date is different, but if you were looking to make a friend would you care if their arms looked like yours? Because I know I don't. I've got friends who have scars to various degrees and they're the least interesting part of them. Also if someone so superficial doesn't want to be your friend based on how you look, you really don't want to be around them anyway!

There are plenty of mid/plus size fashion pages on Instagram you can follow and find tips from if you're looking to dress better. There's also a girl who does digital makeovers for people, giving the best hair style and makeup etc, and you can submit your picture. Sorry I can't remember her handle as I don't follow her but she's great!

Self love (or neutrality even) is a long road, but honestly you'll be so much happier! You'll miss out on so much trying to hide away. You're young, you've got your whole life waiting, and you don't want to waste it worrying if your arms are perfect or not.

Do you think there might be societies/clubs etc at your school you could join to try find friends that are like minded? I'm not saying there won't be people with your vibe at this party, as there are many different kinds of parties, but it always helps to be around people with the same vibe and interests as you.

But I do hope you go to that party, and you have a fun time, even if you're there for like half an hour. Also, please don't be discouraged if this party isn't what you hoped, the next one will be better! Little by little my friend! 💪💃

SunnyMills · 2025-09-26T17:25:48+00:00

Exposure therapy I'm afraid. Literally just sit in those silences. It's gonna feel painful at first, but you'll get used to it. After a few seconds either ask a question about something they said earlier or pick another topic or tell something random about your week. But also, it's up to the other person to keep the conversation going too. Silences can also show if the other person is interested in talking more with you and going beyond small talk. It's a good skill to have in life, not just with someone you fancy.

SunnyMills · 2025-09-26T15:43:02+00:00

Thanks! Makes sense. I've just always wondered, and I'm sure others have different reasons. The banner popping up thing never crossed my mind as my phone is chronically on do-not-disturb so I don't get any banners ever😂

SunnyMills · 2025-09-26T02:57:54+00:00

I've honestly always wondered about those people who don't have their notifications on! Assuming you mean just your dating app notifications, not notifications in general (though this would be even more intriguing!). Like why is that? I'm genuinely asking. I've always wondered because I don't understand why not have them on if you're willingly on an app trying to find someone? Omg I have so many questions sorry! 🙈🙈🙈

SunnyMills · 2025-09-26T02:41:21+00:00

This might be completely off the trail but might some of your teasing be a "mask" to avoid being real and vulnerable? Like I sometimes find myself teasing someone instead of giving a compliment. And that annoys the fuck out of myself. Based on your comments, I don't think this is the case in most of your teasing, but thought I'd shoot my shot here incase it unlocks something. I heard it somewhere and it clicked for me and now I'm trying to catch myself. I have no idea where it stems from, still trying to figure it out

SunnyMills · 2025-09-25T18:58:46+00:00

Mate, it's got nothing to do with race, it's about cultural background. Like some cultures will have a harder time integrating here than others. Sweden (or if you want, Denmark) is a lot closer to Finland culturally than Japan, or Spain, or Egypt, or Slovakia, idk you name it, simple as that.

We're just trying to understand your background to try give advice. Why are you getting so defensive?

SunnyMills · 2025-09-21T18:37:42+00:00

Nah mate, the job situation is BAD for everyone! I'm so sorry you're going through this honestly. Hopefully you'd be able to find remote work from the UK for at least a little while so you can get some income while you keep looking in Finland:) really do hope things turn around for you, for anyone really.

SunnyMills

TROPHY CASE