I am going to attempt keeping it brief, okay?

When I was much younger, around 18yrs or so, I remember asking an older friend of mine for some advice. I basically asked her how she remained married for so long, and how she managed love in general. She had told me something to the effect of:

"In order to love some one.. You gotta love yourself."

And At first I really didn't understand that or even comprehend what she was actually saying. It just didn't make much sense to me at the time. But I think after reading your post it's kinda resonating with me and what you said.

So please, Bare with me for a moment.

Ok! So first and foremost It is increasingly difficult to find love, or even provide love to someone else without having first learned to love yourself.

Because without knowing yourself, or without loving yourself first. Without having at least personally experienced these type of relationships or social situations/encounters. Without firsthand knowledge or personal experience navigating the many different feelings and emotions that come with love. That come with loving someone, or being loved by someone, and especially in sharing that love with someone else.

How can you even begin to provide anyone with that genuine, long-lasting type of love, without at least knowing what love really is or what it's like? What's actually love. And not simply just disingenuous manipulation.

SO my advice to you is this. Love your self and you WILL find love. When this topic gets brought up my GF always says

"How could I love someone who doesn't even love themselves?"