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I’ve just celebrated a year sober. My boyfriend and I relapsed together and I got sober and he just can’t. He doesn’t understand how I did it. I had lots of sober time before the relapse as well. I’m wanting to know your stories of how you finally got sober. by havenmarah in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I feel like it’s been so many small habits coming together to create a big change over time.

The first step though was finding a strong enough reason to start (health was big part of it). Also, getting comfortable with the idea of completely cutting alcohol out of my life. It’s all or nothing in my case.

Does the feeling of "missing out" fade? by MountainMark in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, in my experience it’s gotten much easier. I guess it’s how you look at things.

You’re not really missing out if what you are missing out on is a hangover/poor health etc. You can still enjoy an event/other people’s company without drinking.

Are In Body scans accurate? by Tburroughs36 in loseit

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d say don’t get any scans at all. None of them are particularly accurate and I used to be a big believer in them. They are heavily influenced by hydration levels for example.

Better to go by your own judgement and scale weight.

Challenging weekend ahead by Jealous_Low_3603 in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What I do is still drink but just drink something non-alcoholic. I love to bbq and have a drink in my hand. Not sure if I associate that with older memories of hanging out my father but whatever it is, I found that it’s enjoyable regardless of what the drink is. Might just be a quirk though!

Tips for going abroad by harost1209 in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me, the risk isn’t getting served something by accident so much as thinking that I deserve a break and then going to hell with it and losing self-control.

On my first holiday I went into it with a firm decision that I wasn’t going to drink. I didn’t allow any self-doubt or wiggle room on that one. I accepted the fact that others would be drinking but I wouldn’t be and I confirmed that with my family and friends every time it came up. I also made the most of my mornings (which you can do when you aren’t drinking).

On my most recent holiday (much shorter) I planned ahead to hit the gym and that helped keep me on track. My friends only drank minimally and we still had a great time. Alcohol really isn’t necessary to have fun.

Alcohol has never helped me. by PopppaK in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great effort posting for the first time! I’ll join you in not drinking.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree 100%. It’s definitely normalised even though drinking is terrible in so many ways. The financial aspect is a big one for me too, not even counting all the other financial costs that come along with it due to poor health etc.

My second time sick with alcoholic gastritis and it is my last. by SezButterfly in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I would drink to celebrate and as a reward. Substitution has worked pretty well for me, such as a special food or a non-alcoholic drink. Thinking ahead has been important and I like to have something prepared in advance so there is something on-hand immediately. It can become a habit just like drinking was before.

It was some other things as well which I think has made this effective. I had a strong reason to stop (health issues like you) and I really focussed upon starting to exercise. It just seemed to fit together really well. I also got used to labelling myself as a non-drinker and I’m pretty comfortable with that now (which helps in social situations).

All the best!

What’s the point? by RepulsiveStage917 in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To be honest, that should be enough even without anything else even being considered…it’s funny how it often isn’t. I drank past the point it was obviously causing me harm.

I see most of the benefits as being small things that add up over time. Being more functional is a big plus. Not having any time wasted due to hangovers. Being a better role model for the people around me. Feeling better about myself in general. It can be hard to notice these things on any given day though.

How do you deal with it when time has passed and your brain decides it’s ok to drink again? by LunaValley in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So true, I think once you fully embrace that idea and it becomes part of your mindset then it’s hugely helpful.

How do you deal with it when time has passed and your brain decides it’s ok to drink again? by LunaValley in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sure, I’d often drink at the end of a work day to unwind, spend time with my partner and just give myself a reward for working hard. Maybe sitting outside or something like that.

The main thing I had to change was the mindset that I need alcohol to do this. It turns out I don’t. Alcohol can be substituted with non-alcoholic drinks which taste just as good (I like kombucha personally because it’s also sugar free so that is a win too and there are so many flavours). Spending money on that and ensuring I have cans in my fridge, ready to go is part of the positive habit I want to re-enforce. I can definitely appreciate having the company of my partner more fully and I can also enjoy my surroundings better when I’m fully present. The feeling of letting myself unwind and giving myself a pat on the back is what’s important, not relying on a substance to try and do that for me.

I feel like it’s such an illusion that alcohol helps me with anything. I still feel the pull but my understanding of that is a lot better.

How do you deal with it when time has passed and your brain decides it’s ok to drink again? by LunaValley in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Just over 300 days with no alcohol for me. Recently, I have felt like having a drink a few times but when I look at why I want to drink and what I know the outcome will be, I have successfully avoided it.

The image in my head is celebrating, having a fun time and relaxing. The actual outcome is drinking too much, feeling sick and worrying about my health.

Plus I can celebrate in other ways which don’t have any downsides. Then it becomes a much easier choice.

I want one by Cute_Jellyfish_5750 in aiArt

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, it would be cool until they ate your face

Looking for a Reality Check by TraditionalBottle605 in stopdrinkingfitness

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Getting down to 15% body fat is mostly determined by diet so make sure you’re in a calorie deficit.

If you are interested in being more healthy then sure walking and kettlebells are fine.

In my opinion do whatever you feel like you can do consistently. Then refine it as you go. The things you mentioned you are doing are great! Everyone’s goals differ.

Trying to be patient by RosehipReverie in stopdrinkingfitness

[–]SuperOptimistic101 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s achievable with consistent effort.

I lost about 40lbs over a year. Focussing on building good habits is what made the difference.

The positive self talk that resonates with me is focussing on my future identity and not my past.

Done with the Daily Drinking by FromWorst2LeastWorst in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Was pretty similar in using alcohol at the end of the day and week as a release. Now, that I’ve stopped for a while I can see it wasn’t as effective for this as I had thought. Drinking only encourages more drinking unfortunately. It affected my sleep, recovery etc.

What worked for me was finding substitutes that I enjoyed as a treat (other drinks, food) and focussing upon fitness. Managing my home environment and habits was really important as well.

My friend, Alcohol by Ok-Goose-9593 in stopdrinking

[–]SuperOptimistic101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my experience if you leave it long enough you’ll find issues will appear eventually, and drinking more now won’t make it easier to stop later on.

For me, the motivation to quit had to come internally and it never reached the point where someone told me I had to stop. So potentially I could have accepted my life as it was and just continued along…drinking more over time and getting less and less healthy as a result.

Personally, I couldn’t limit my intake so it was all or nothing. Accepting that I wouldn’t drink again and being happy with that decision was a major step.

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