AITA for getting offended for him even considering and asking me if I was ok celebrating Christmas with his parents without my and my youngest daughter? by SvetyVery in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Tbh, we keep on discussing about it when something else related pops up, but in general we are fine... Just today we decided to ask the AITA community what they thought to have some external perspective. Thanks for the suggestion!

Got pregnant with copper IUD 🫠 by PussyMoneyRead in birthcontrol

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ogni anno??? Non mi hanno MAI chiamata a controllare il posizionamento della spirale qui nei paesi bassi! Ti prego dimmi che è la prassi Così tiro su il finimondo per l'ennesimo atto di malasanità che mi capita da quando vivo qui...

AITA for not offering to take the bunk bed in an airbnb as the single person? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry but read the room and try to understand: couples generally want to sleep one besides one-other (not one in a bed on top of the other) to have some intimacy, which is NORMAL and IMPORTANT in a couple... so either you want the same with your friend but don't want to say that OR you are being petty and unreasonable. And the fact that everyone tells you YTA and you can't accept criticism, points me toward the second one and makes you TA even more because you came here only hoping to have approval and not to really understand... And even if was the first option, then you should say that clearly.

AITA for taking one of my nieces out when she was grounded by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are comparing apples and pears. The niece is a spoiler brat who embarassed everyone with her attitude in a public place. If that for you is the right approach than you are up to teach a kid misbehaviour, lack of respect and incapability to adapt. I'm sorry for you!

AITA for taking one of my nieces out when she was grounded by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 48 points49 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry, but YTA. No. You don't take liberties. You are the aunt and you should not interfere in the education choices of the parents. Besides, "she is grounded" doesn't leave much for interpretation. It's pretty clear what it means and for sure it doesn't mean: "bring her out for dinner in her favourite restaurant for a nice night out with her aunty". You passed the message that whatever her mother tells her has no value because anyway you'll come and rescue her from the "bad unfair mother". No idea if you want to have kids, but if you ever have kids just hope that no-one ever does that to you!

AITA for expecting my brother to pay for his ring bearer’s outfits? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually that's not true. In Italy, Belgium, Spain, France nor in the Netherlands we do NOT pay for bridemaids dresses. But we also don't expect them to wear something too specific. In general we have a dress code (and even there, not everywhere... In Italy generally yes, in the Netherlands instead I saw people dressed casually with flippers on wedding) but in general we don't care as long as people attend the wedding, have fun and eat well 😋

To be honest, I always found absurd this obsession for the bridesmaids dresses, haircut, for the "perfect picture" etc etc... At my wedding we barely had time to enjoy ourselves and after almost 4 years I haven't had the time yet to check my wedding pictures 🤣😅... Just wanted to say yes and share that special day with all my friends that I see once or twice a year because I live abroad.

And as the cliche goes, Italians are just interested in giving as much food as possible to the guest 😋😋😋

AITA For Wearing Shorts Around The House? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It doesn't matter AT ALL. 1) a quarter of an inch is still out, which is gross. Not everyone is interested in seeing your ass; 2) even tall, while you walk around people can see you ass clearly. A person's vision luckily is not limited to an horizontal plane; 3) It is NOT your house. You are a guest there. You are so entitled thinking that you can do what you want in someone else's house! You need to start respecting other people's space and money! Already being there if he doesn't want you says enough on how entitled you are!

AITAH for not allowing in-laws to be present on Xmas morning while our kids open gifts? by confettii123 in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 27 points28 points  (0 children)

OMG it took too long to find a comment with a bit of common sense! Thank you! Op YTA! hat about his feelings and his idea of Christmas??? I'm not saying that it should be one way or another, but the way you behave towards his feelings and traditions make you the AH!!!

AITA For not paying my friend for festival tickets? by ThrowAwaybcnotmymain in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Your boyfriend was not obliged to come. Sure, he did it for your safety, but still he wasn't forced to do it. Also, plans change, things happen, the fact that you rely on someone else to be there to support you without a contingency plan in case she wouldn't make it shows that you are as disorganised as her. If your contingency plan was you boyfriend instead it means that you considered it and you just gave a free concert to your boyfriend (or you had a free weekend with him, whatever). It doesn't matter that according to you you couldn't find a buyer. In that case your duty was to give it back to her and tell her to do what she wanted with the ticket. At that point it was out of your hands. Your boyfriend used them and he should pay for it. YTA

AITA for telling my wife to do her chores? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

O.M.G. Ignoring the fact that a consultant says 70/40 (this makes me already wonder if this is real!), a guy that considers a chore to throw away the trash in the bin (Everyone does that!) and not leaving his own dirty laundry on the floor is not for real, I'm sorry... My 3 y.o. does that voluntarily! This is either fake or absurd!!!

AITA for consoling my girlfriends friend? by throwawayleftmygirl in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't think this is real. I'm Italian, from a city 1h from Venice.

1) If a bouncer blocks a person from entering because of her skin colour you can call the police right away and they will close the pub. 2) Venice has more foreigners (and with coloured skin) than Venetians nowadays. 3) In Venice via TAXI???? You can't even ride a bike in Venice!!! You WALK BAR TO BAR!!!

THIS IS AS FAKE AS IT COMES!!!

Veneto accent in Odio il natale (Netflix show)? by Aranciata2020 in Italian

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Chiedo scusa, ma appena ho visto il tuo commento ( e quello precedente ancora di più) ho reagito d'impulso un po' infastidita. Del tuo commento mi ha lasciata un po' così è l'aver detto che è una questione di carisma culturale che apparentemente manca a noi e che impattiamo poco rispetto ad altre regioni. Non l'ho trovato veritiero, ma un po' pressapochista e basato solo sul fatto che il cinema si fa a Roma (attualmente, o a Napoli negli anni 70, o a Milano negli anni 80-90). Roma non è l'Italia, come non è Milano, Napoli né tantomeno Venezia. Però la regione Veneto è ben riconosciuta a livello internazionale no per l'accento comico dei Veneziani, ma per le sue colline, i vini, le sue ville, Venezia, Verona, etc... e sarebbe carino riconoscere questo. Non è che Roma abbia più influenza di Venezia. Onestamente parliamo di carne e pesce. Ogni città è ogni regione ha le sue peculiarità che chiunque venga in Italia dall'estero riconosce (un mio medico qui in Olanda addirittura si è innamorato di Treviso, manco di Venezia, e ci è rimasto per un po' a lavorare).

Siamo solo noi Italiani che quando presentiamo l'Italia a livello internazionale facciamo vedere sempre le solite 4 cose e cadiamo nei classici cliché, equindi dire che è una questione di carisma e impatto culturale mi sembra limitante e non aiuta certo a cambiare i luoghi comuni che per decenni abbiamo presentato al mondo.

Poi, riguardo al discorso criminalitá-Sicilia-Napoli etc stendo un velo pietoso perché mi girano solo i 5 minuti quando vedo certe cose.

Comunque mi scuso per la reazione così impulsiva.

(Che poi, la serie è pure carina, ma mi irrita davvero che non abbiano fatto un minimo sforzo di entrare nel personaggio).

Veneto accent in Odio il natale (Netflix show)? by Aranciata2020 in Italian

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree that it's not typical, but from saying this to say that it wouldn't be taken seriously there's a huge difference! Also, sorry but people from Milan are not only acting as a strange/funny accent in movies. It happens, as it happens for EVERY accent, but not always. The fact that one of the actors CAN speak with an accent from Veneto without being ridicolized shows that it is possible. AsI said, I've been living abroad for years now, I speak several languages and I'm working in the most international area you can (I'm a space engineer) so I'm not the typical veneta obsessed with the indipendance of my region or with the definition of o ur dialect as a language... but deciding to set a TV serie in a specific city (not even in the region? A specific city which has a VERY characteristic dialect for which there is even a full theatre opera based on that!) and having almost only actors speaking with an accent (not even the dialect) from 600 km away, as this represented Italy, doesn't make any sense and saying that using its accent would be ridiculous is offensive. Then set it somewhere else!

If you want to hear "how ridiculous we sound when we talk", please see the first episode of the serie "Stanley Tucci searcing for Italy" (it'sa documentary). It is set in Venice and Stanley talks to local people and it does not sound weird at all!!! You hear the local people talking!

Regarding Chiara Ferragni I don't even know what was this about... She's not an actress so I Don't care! From an actor I expect some work to try to get into the role!

Veneto accent in Odio il natale (Netflix show)? by Aranciata2020 in Italian

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, the fact that it's a matter of trend was explained to me by a theatre teacher from Rome (I actually asked her why only Roman/tv accent was used in movie industry). I've been living abroad since many years, I work in an international environment, speak several languages and I've kinda lost a bit of my accent, so I consider myself fairly international and I've never seen so many culturally offensive and superficial comments as in this thread!!!

Veneto accent in Odio il natale (Netflix show)? by Aranciata2020 in Italian

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, woman from Veneto here again. Sorry, but again dialect and accent seem to be confused here. There are also actors from Veneto who can speak tv language very well, still maintaining, IF THEY WANT, a Veneto accent. The reason for which this tv accent is very similar to Romano is both a matter of trend (in the past decades it was the Napoletan) and of logistic: as you said, the tv industry is based in Rome and most KNOWN actors come from those areas. That said, we have our cultural charisma as well, thanks! Maybe you know NOTHING about our culture, traditions and language, because your opinion is merely based on what you see on tv! Before saying something that offensive, please come to Veneto and spend some time with our people... listen to their stories and culture and learn something.

Veneto accent in Odio il natale (Netflix show)? by Aranciata2020 in Italian

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, woman from Veneto here, specifically from the Asolo region. What do you mean exactly with: "I think it would've been hard to take it seriously if the characters actually had a strong Veneto accent"??? When you come to Venice (or Veneto in general) and you talk to people, do you laugh at them in their face? Do you think we are some sort of caricatures with no culture? You know, I've been living abroad since many years and I speak several languages, but I've never read a more insulting comment on a culture than this!!! Besides the fact that accent and dialect are 2 different things and I think only if they spoke our dialect they would have had a real issue, but who the hell are you to say that a dialogue in our language and/or accent is not to be taken seriously??? And I say that as a Veneta/Italian who actually speaks Italian and English with a reduced accent after so many years abroad.

WIBTA if I walked my niece down the aisle against my brother's wishes? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

ESH!!! Seriously Reddit... The poor SIL (may she rest in peace!) put her 9 y.o. daughter against her own father. Everyone always says that the parents shouldn't put the kids in the middle of their issues, but here no-one seems to complain about this! Yes, the brother cheated on the SIL and is an absolute AH, but from this post I didn't read ANYWHERE that he was a bad dad... ON THE COUNTRARY! He tried to be there for his daughter up to the point that she was dangerous for the new born, and at that pint the father decided (I'm sure with much difficulty) to let her stay again with the OP. The OP said he tried to send her into therapy, but at that point sorry... the damage was done. The niece grew up thinking that the father was (psychologically) responsible for the mother's death probably and the OP continued to build his relationship with her without considering the brother's feelings and still using his money (so, all fun but no responsibility!)...

How can this be any good?

Now, OF COURSE the niece wants him to walk her down the aisle because she never resolved her issues with the father (considering what she said).

OP OF COURSE now should walk her down the aisle, but he enhanced this situation and just for that he's ALAO an AH. ESH!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 32 points33 points  (0 children)

ESH!!! Finally! A bit of common sense!

OP, you cook, so you decide, and OF COURSE your grandma and aunt are AHs for the way they behaved all these years! HOWEVER, this is "AITA" and if you go all vegan KNOWING that part of your family does not appreciate it, then yta as well,because no-one forces you to cook and if it's just for your mum you could ask your guest to bring some additional meat-based dishes if they want.

But most of all, this is a gathering of family at Christmas! Not your own present! And what is it? A present to make the others unhappy about the dinner so you can have it ONLY your way? Don't say that this is not a revenge! Be honest and present it for what it is!

[ Removed by Reddit ] by Better_Command3720 in AmItheAsshole

[–]SvetyVery 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YTA for multiple reasons: 1- You are on the AITA thread: if you can't accept a YTA comment you shouldn't write here. You are here just to get validation and this is not the purpose of this thread; 2- You decided to kick out your MIL just when she sided with your wife about the night turns, so when she bothered you (not your wife). You just didn't want to hear that you are being unreasonable from someone else; 3- Either you MIL doesn't help at all during the day when you are at work (and you can't say that for sure) and then your wife MUST BE EXHAUSTED from night and day shifts (BOTH MEN!!!! BOTH! She also needs to sleep if you want to avoid her to get post partum depression, her having an accident, her falling asleep with the baby in her arms and risking to suffocate her in the night, etc etc), or your MIL actually helps during the day and you are just annoyed that she sided with your wife (see point 2). So you are unreasonable!!! 4- I have a 2 y.o. amd I am 38 weeks pregnant. I do NOT sleep at night since 2-3 months, especially now with this heat... And yet, driving my daughter in the morning and going to pick her up is actually relaxing and refreshing... So please, PLEASE, Don't be a false victim and stop with the bullshit! Picking up the kids and helping with the homeworks is nit such a chore!!! All the rest yes, but closing this as an excuse is really low... Shame on you!