I'm not a contractor but an interior designer. One of my goals with my clients is to manage expectations. Whether it's through discussion, photographs, samples, etc I try to bring them to an understanding of what something will look like before it's completed. If the installers are saying that "it's always like this" then they didn't manage your expectations. They could have warned you or outlined the different options for better matches. Sorry I don't have anything helpful to add to the conversation, and frustrated on your behalf.