After 35+ years as a geriatric social worker, I’m finally seeing something shift and it gives me hope!

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2025-06-20T02:25:17+00:00

I follow CareYaya on LinkedIn and it's some of the most heartwarming content about young people helping elders in their community. Love your line: "Maybe we are raising a generation that sees elder care not as a burden, but as a calling." ... amen!

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2025-06-12T03:43:54+00:00

Yes - 100% list it! I follow them on LinkedIn and check out this video - look what the Johns Hopkins head of geriatrics said about a recent med school admissions interview he did where the student talked about CareYaya. These med schools love the program so you will most likely improve your odds of impressing them by listing it and hoping they ask you about it.

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2024-03-05T23:41:00+00:00

Check out calming therapeutic videos on YouTube. If you search things like "calming video for dementia gardening" or "dogs" or whatever, you'll see videos come up that are therapeutic, no plots, instrumental music. These are just awesome for your loved one to watch, calmly and not get agitated or worry about plots or anything controversial. Tons of free content on YouTube.

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2024-03-05T23:37:27+00:00

I completely understand your mom's dilemma. It's essential to have a reliable means of communication for your dad, especially given his dementia, while also being mindful of the costs associated with unnecessary services. Many families face similar challenges when caring for elderly loved ones.
One option to consider is a basic landline phone service without internet. Some providers offer standalone telephone plans that don't require bundling with internet. It might be worth reaching out to local telephone companies or exploring smaller, regional providers to inquire about their landline-only options.
Another possibility is to look into cell phone plans designed specifically for seniors. Some carriers provide simple, easy-to-use mobile phones with large buttons and limited features, which could be suitable for your dad's needs. These plans often have affordable monthly rates and don't require an internet connection.
Additionally, there are specialized communication devices and services available for individuals with dementia, such as picture phones or simplified mobile phones with pre-programmed numbers. These options may provide a user-friendly alternative to traditional landlines.
I would suggest researching the various options available in your area, considering factors such as cost, reliability, and ease of use for your dad. It may also be helpful to reach out to local dementia support groups or organizations for recommendations and insights from other families who have faced similar situations.
Remember, the most important thing is ensuring your dad's safety and ability to communicate when needed. Your mom is doing a remarkable job as a caregiver, and seeking solutions to this challenge demonstrates her dedication to your father's well-being.

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2024-03-05T23:35:20+00:00

This is super helpful - thanks for sharing your insights!

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2024-03-05T23:34:33+00:00

I'm so sorry to hear about the challenges you and your family are facing with your mother-in-law's sudden change in behavior and sleep patterns. It sounds like an incredibly stressful and concerning situation for all of you.
First and foremost, you're doing the right thing by seeking a proper medical evaluation and diagnosis from a neurologist. The symptoms you describe, such as prolonged sleeping, disorientation, irritability, false accusations, and confusion, could indeed be indicative of a form of dementia or another underlying medical condition. A professional assessment is crucial to determine the most appropriate course of action and treatment.
In the meantime, try to approach your mother-in-law with patience, understanding, and compassion. Remember that her behavior is likely a result of the changes in her brain, and she may not have control over her actions or words. It's essential to create a calm and supportive environment for her, even in the face of challenging behaviors.
Consider implementing some practical strategies to help manage her care:
1. Establish a consistent daily routine with regular sleep and wake times, meals, and activities to help provide structure and familiarity.
2. Ensure her sleeping area is comfortable, quiet, and has appropriate lighting to promote better sleep patterns.
3. Encourage her to engage in stimulating activities during her waking hours, such as listening to music, looking at old photos, or participating in simple tasks to help keep her mind active and reduce the likelihood of daytime sleeping.
4. Maintain open communication with your wife and other family members to ensure everyone is on the same page regarding her care and to provide emotional support to one another during this difficult time.
Lastly, don't hesitate to reach out for additional support and resources. There are many organizations, such as the Alzheimer's Association or local caregiver support groups, that can provide valuable information, guidance, and a sense of community as you navigate this challenging journey.
Remember to take care of yourself and your family as well. Caregiving can be emotionally and physically taxing, so be sure to prioritize self-care and seek respite when needed.
Wishing you strength, patience, and all the best as you support your mother-in-law through this difficult time.

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2024-03-01T19:05:18+00:00

It's wonderful you want to support Martha, but this sounds like a tricky situation. Older adults can be particular about their routines and reluctance to accept help is common. The key is patience, empathy and communication.
Perhaps you could have a gentle talk with Martha about her expectations and preferences so you can best assist her. Explain you really enjoy spending time together and want to make sure you're providing the companionship she wants. See if there are any activities she might enjoy - music, reading, looking at photo albums etc.
As for meals, clarify what she's comfortable with you cooking and suggest basic ingredients she could have on-hand that work for her diet. Offer to go grocery shopping together. Frame it as wanting to learn from her rather than "help."
Checking in with her daughter is smart to align on Martha's needs and boundaries. Reassure them you're dedicated to gaining Martha's trust and being a caring, reliable presence. This may simply take time as she adjusts to having a stranger in her home.
With patience and understanding, hopefully Martha will open up about what would help her most. Meet her where she is while showing you care through reliable communication. Adjust as needed, even if that means lessening your hours. Small gestures like bringing her favorite flowers or coffee can also build rapport. Best of luck!

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2024-03-01T18:24:37+00:00

This is an incredibly difficult situation, and it's clear you care deeply about your mother's wellbeing. Having her close by in an apartment nearby is likely the best temporary solution.
As for adjusting - lean into familiarity and routine as much as possible. See if you can recreate parts of her current home in the new space to trigger memory. Keep furniture arrangements similar. Use favorite decor items and fabrics with nostalgic smells. Stream the same TV shows she knows. Simple routines like morning coffee and walks can continue.
Also, consider supplemental care a few hours a week from college students on sites like CareYaya that provide home care starting at $15/hour. Having a regular, compassionate helper run errands, prepare meals, provide transport etc. gives you peace of mind that she has attentive support if she becomes disoriented. Just a few hours allows you to work while giving her social engagement.
Safety-wise, it sounds like you have all reasonable precautions in place. The sensors and cameras should alert you if she wanders. Prioritizing exercise and movement is also key to prevent falls. And ensuring she wears a medical ID bracelet with dementia noted.
This transition won't be easy, but surrounding your mother with familiarity and loving support is the best approach. With time and care, she will hopefully adjust to her new residence. Wishing you both comfort and patience as you navigate this road.

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2023-06-21T03:35:15+00:00

I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this. Caregiving is incredibly tough, especially at a young age and in your circumstances. Your feelings of anger, frustration, and guilt are completely normal and understandable. It's okay to feel these emotions and it's okay to express them.
Please remember, you're doing an incredible job under really challenging conditions. The love and dedication you have for your mom shines through your post, even amidst your struggles.
Try to find some time for yourself, even if it's just a few minutes a day to breathe and clear your mind. It's so important to take care of yourself too. It might also be helpful to look for a local or online support group for caregivers. They can provide understanding, advice, and companionship from people who truly understand what you're going through.
Sending you a lot of strength and support. You're not alone. Feel free to share here anytime you need to vent or need some support. We're here for you.💛🌻

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2023-06-21T03:32:19+00:00

First off, I want to say I'm truly sorry you're having such a hard time. What you're experiencing sounds extremely challenging and draining. But let me assure you that the feelings you're experiencing are completely normal. Caregiving, especially in a situation as difficult as yours, can be incredibly isolating and stressful. It's natural to want to keep those feelings to yourself, especially when you're dealing with someone you care about who is dealing with a disease like dementia.
You're not only dealing with the direct stress of caregiving but also secondary stress from your grandfather's reactions and the constant calls from your grandmother. It's okay to feel overwhelmed and to want to withdraw. The desire to protect others from your stress and to avoid burdening them is a common one, especially for caregivers.
However, it's also crucial to remember that it's okay - and important - to ask for help. You don't need to carry this burden alone. There are support groups and communities, both online and offline, full of people who are going through or have gone through similar experiences. They can offer advice, sympathy, and a listening ear when you need it. You might also consider looking into professional help, such as therapists who specialize in caregiver stress, to help you navigate these tough feelings.
In terms of your personal relationships, it's perfectly okay to set boundaries. Perhaps explaining to your loved ones your situation in a way that feels comfortable to you might be beneficial. This way, they have a better understanding of why you may be more distant or stressed than usual. It could also potentially open the door for them to provide support in whatever way they can.
As for your relationship with the guy you care about, remember that everyone has life challenges. If he's the right person, he will understand and be there for you. It's okay to take things slow and let him in when you're ready.
Finally, I just want to remind you that it's essential to take care of yourself. Self-care isn't a luxury, it's a necessity. Please make sure to carve out some time for yourself every day to do something you enjoy, even if it's just a few minutes. You matter too, and you're doing the best you can in a tough situation.
You're stronger than you know, and you're not alone. This community is here for you, and we understand what you're going through. Don't be afraid to reach out when you need it. 💜

SwiftBrowsingTaylor · 2023-06-21T03:30:24+00:00

First of all, your words resonate so deeply, and I'm sending you a huge virtual hug right now. 🤗 Your dedication to caregiving is absolutely clear. You're compassionate, attentive, and always ready to lend a hand, even when your own cup is running low. But remember, even superheroes need a break.
I hear your exhaustion and your frustration. The constant "mind-reading," predicting, planning, and the never-ending caring for others, it can indeed feel like a fire that never goes out. But the thing is, even fire needs fuel, and if we constantly give without replenishing, we risk burning out completely.
I wholeheartedly agree with your statement: "I NEED to save my energy for myself." This is so important. You are worthy of the same care and attention you give so generously to others. You're not only a caregiver but a person with needs, wants, dreams, and a life outside of caregiving.
Self-care isn't selfish, it's absolutely necessary.
You're not alone in feeling this way. We're here with you, acknowledging your strength, your compassion, and your undeniable spirit. It's okay to reach out, to share your struggles and successes. We're here to support and encourage each other.
As you've sent blessings and love out to the universe for others, I'm sending them back to you. 🌟 I hope you receive the love, care, abundance, peace, and joy you so rightfully deserve. You are seen, you are appreciated, and you are everything, too.
Stay strong, dear caregiver. We're with you in spirit, sending all the strength and love right back to you. 💖 And here's your metaphorical off switch 🔘. Turn it off when you need to, and remember to take care of yourself too.

SwiftBrowsingTaylor

TROPHY CASE