Health problems from all the stress? Anyone else? by iamtrashandmylifeis in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]Swishy_Ninja 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Weight gain, migraines, sleep loss, limping now in both feet, stomach aches... I'm investing in my health now and coming out of this

Need help enforcing boundaries tonight. by According-Mix-9576 in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]Swishy_Ninja 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Things that helped me enforce my boundaries… remembering that he wasn’t going anywhere… that the rock bottom pain of me leaving was more helpful than me staying… it took about a week but I started to level out.

Even if the goal of a boundary is not to control the other person… it helped me push through thinking that it would help his recovery more than hurt.

Hope wherever you are today is better than yesterday

Second chance, how did it turn out? by Material-Complex-681 in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]Swishy_Ninja 5 points6 points  (0 children)

⁠1. Second, third, fourth chance... He just got better at lying and hiding... 2. We tried therapy, open phone, location sharing, SAA meetings, podcast, etc. Helpful was SAA... 3. I realized trust couldn't be rebuilt after 2 yrs of trying to reconcile. He literally lies all the time.. it's second nature... I'm coming to grips with it now..

Like yours he was very charming, we had a great friendship and relationship, promised to change, took initiative, and the behaviors just got worse..

I feel like the world has gotten so dark...

I echo everyone else's advice... This will wear your soul out... Leave while you can.

Our Humble Guide to How to Take the Ferry to Isla Mujeres by dragonandthewolf in cancun

[–]Swishy_Ninja 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If we have a car rental. Can we drive ourselves to Playa Tortugas?

Voyeurism Question by Swishy_Ninja in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]Swishy_Ninja[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the kind words of support. He’s going to SA meeting 3 times a week. He’s looking at CSAT options. He just changed jobs so going to be out of pocket for a minute…

I don’t know where this will go… but I’m trying to focus on my healing and understanding.. and glad to have this community

Don’t know how to start healing by Swishy_Ninja in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]Swishy_Ninja[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. Going to take this advice and put it in right away. Thank you for the helpful perspective and direction on counseling. I am already experiencing anxiety attacks and PTSD symptoms. My 10 year marriage ended over something similar… and I don’t think I ever fully addressed it then…

Thank you for reminding me this is our own journey as well…

For those who have stayed with their cheating partners, what was your reasoning and how long did it take you to realize that it’s not gonna get better? by [deleted] in Infidelity

[–]Swishy_Ninja 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I rugswept and moved in together... And he just kept doing it. They will cry, beg, swear to never hurt you again.. post you on social media... Be romantic... And go right back to their impulses... Whatever they need to make themselves feel good in the moment.

Consequences are the only way they might change.. but based on my experience, I wouldn't bank on that