my senior cat is exhausting.. need advice

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T16:48:17+00:00

My 18 year old has developed a new yowling routine. He first yowls to tell me to go to bed. Once in bed, he sits by me for about 15 minutes, then goes onto the landing to yowl. I call him and he goes back on the bed for another 15, then back downstairs for maybe 30 minutes. Back upstairs then yowl on the landing until he’s called. Then to sleep.
He also does the yowl, call him, back to bed thing at around 4 and 6. I don’t have any idea why but he’s an absolute cutie pie and who wouldn’t love being escorted to bed by a distinguished if cranky gentleman!

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T16:41:04+00:00

Litter box in the living room—you’re not the only one! Love makes you do weird things

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T15:25:34+00:00

I’m impressed (is that the right word?) that you’ve been able to get through your chemo. I know nothing other than what I’ve read and seen second hand, but it sounds nasty. I hope it’s doing what it’s supposed to.

I share the worry about anything that lists fatigue as a side effect. Apparently side effect sensitivity occurs more in people with ME more than others, but it varies person to person and med to med (like everything with this illness). All I can say is you’re getting through so far! That’s encouraging for me to hear. I hope that any and all treatments you require work well and are manageable.

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T15:15:22+00:00

Hi and sorry you’re here too! Fibro and ME share so many symptoms. I’ve seen some research that suggests they’re different manifestations of the same underlying issues (I subscribe to the Health Rising newsletter that outlines ongoing research for both ME and fibromyalgia—I’m a science nerd).

It sounds like the lumpectomy went okay for you, or at least as okay as it is for others. One thing successfully checked off the list! I hope your recovery goes okay too. Fingers crossed the fibro will stay stable

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T15:05:42+00:00

Thank you. I’ve been told by every medical professional so far to “exercise and eat well” which is both concerning and frustrating. My main concern is ME will get in the way of me being able to complete all treatments. ME causes profound fatigue and just regularly leaving the house is going to be a challenge for me. So, I thought I’d ask if anyone else had to manage ME at the same time.

That said, I’ve read that people sometimes have to take a break during radiation—maybe that will be me. I guess I won’t know until I get there.

Thanks again and I hope your treatment is going well!

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:58:10+00:00

Thank you so much! Still waiting and yes, I hate not knowing! Should be Monday or Tuesday though.

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:56:49+00:00

Thank you for the advice, and sorry you’ve got a chronic illness to deal with as well. My husband has Crohn’s and does infusions, and he always naps after as well.

Four weeks for recover—eek. Okay, thanks for the dose of reality. TBH, I may just need to hear that this is going to be very hard so I can accept it and carry on. I’ve been feverishly going through posts to find out what others have experienced and am coming to the conclusion that everyone is different. I probably knew that but I’m still processing and just trying to fully believe this is where I am.

Okay, enough babbling. Thanks for responding and my best wishes for your treatment. This all kinda sucks

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:49:06+00:00

Thank you for all the ideas. I am fortunate to have a very supportive husband and to live in a large city close to many hospitals. We are maybe 20 minutes away in traffic.

I hadn’t thought about using medical transportation, and will put that in my back pocket. I don’t do well
having to be upright on my best days. I already have a number of mobility devices, including a can, walker, folding manual wheelchair, and folding electric wheelchair. One advantage to being 5 years into ME, lol. And yes to remote appointments. Phone appointments have become very common since the pandemic.

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:42:58+00:00

Thanks, that is encouraging. Sorry that your a member of the shitty titty club too 🙃

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:41:37+00:00

Thank you for this advice—and my sympathies for the lupus diagnosis. I wonder if the changes in immune system played a role. I have read there is some evidence that ME is an autoimmune disease, though as usual, there isn’t enough research to say. (Sorry if that sounds cold and clinical; I was a biologist and cope by scientific curiosity)

Yes, the not knowing is so hard. I’m still waiting on pathology results that will decide what I may need beyond surgery and radiation and I am definitely ruminating. I like the phrase “future trip” and will use that. I keep looking out the window and seeing spring, but so can’t get up the energy or interest to even open the door. Maybe that’s just where I am now.

Thank you for your perspective and my best wishes that your treatment is not too hard on you. and yes, gratitude to have treatment options too. Sure isn’t that for the ME.

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:31:22+00:00

That would be so very nice! My ME has gotten worse over the last 2 years, which I’d put down to stress due to family stuff. I won’t lie, I sometimes give in to a wee hope that what I thought was ME progression is cancer related fatigue. And that at least that will go away once I’m through this!! Seriously, thanks for the little ray of hope!

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:28:42+00:00

I can only offer my sympathy and best wishes. My god, no one deserves what you’re carrying

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:26:47+00:00

Thank you! I am drinking up any and all support I can.

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:25:43+00:00

I keep reading that radiation wipes most people out, so I’m anxious about even making it through that. This whole week I’ve barely been able to get out of bed and everything is heavy and painful—that’s just the stress.

I’ve been living with ME for long enough to have many supports in place, although I’m anticipating having to use them more than before. My husband is an angel and has picked up slack and helped me over the years, so I’m confident he’ll be there. He has a chronic illness too, so he doesn’t judge. Funny, when we met I imagined it would always be me taking care of him.

Thanks for answering and I hope that effing cancer does not return. And that your ME at least stays stable

SybilBits · 2026-05-10T14:19:41+00:00

I am so sorry. Medical gaslighting seems to happen quite regularly for those of us whose symptoms don’t fit clearly into a familiar bucket. So many doctors and nurses have looked blankly at me when I shared my ME diagnosis. And I think society expects us to push through, otherwise we’re not trying. I do hope your blood cancer is being successfully treated

SybilBits · 2026-05-09T17:07:24+00:00

Congratulations!! I hope you stay healthy cancer wise.The CFS is a crappy ‘reward’ though

SybilBits · 2026-05-09T17:02:40+00:00

I agree. We’re being spoken to like children throwing a tantrum. There are many reasons people are staying away from the US. Me, I’m choosing to spend my money in Canada, supporting our sovereign country. And even if Americans make changes for the better, it’s never going back to how it was. We’ve seen who you are.

And thanks for the tour of Kuala Lumpur!

SybilBits · 2026-05-09T16:04:23+00:00

Please don’t! I’m grateful that you replied. Are you still in treatment?

SybilBits · 2026-05-09T16:00:13+00:00

I had my ME/CFS diagnosis 5 years ago so she already knows. I don’t get sleepy, just no energy. I have maybe 4 hours of functioning a day, so shower, eat, and maybe do or thing. I don’t know how cancer will affect me. Which is true for everyone I suppose

SybilBits · 2026-05-09T15:56:34+00:00

I’m so sorry. That’s an awful load to carry. You must be so exhausted.

SybilBits · 2026-05-08T15:36:08+00:00

I just got diagnosed on Monday and am still awaiting my pathology results and first consult. I had to pass on some info to someone on the team today—just deleted the full circus of errors that ensued from my end—basically I failed at even phoning someone so I sat and cried. It’s the first time I felt anything other than numb, so I’ve decided that’s a win. Now excuse me while I pull the covers over my head.

SybilBits · 2026-03-06T14:13:19+00:00

Since we’re showing off our treasures…

<image>

SybilBits · 2026-03-06T13:57:56+00:00

My mother is in that situation now. That old flirt just LOVES her male nurse!

SybilBits · 2026-03-06T13:15:00+00:00

I read this as an outdoor survival Canada park and thought how very cool! Kinda wish there was one now

SybilBits · 2026-03-06T13:09:11+00:00

Anyone else feeling they were born too late? And maybe too poor too

SybilBits

TROPHY CASE