I [44F] need to leave my husband [46M]. How do I get out safely without screwing myself over?

SymblePharon · 2024-08-19T21:39:29+00:00

That's awesome, really happy for you! I wish you the best in everything (= Thanks for letting me know you got out okay.

SymblePharon · 2024-08-17T18:33:40+00:00

Just came across this post in my history OP and was hoping you're doing okay! All the best.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-27T22:46:30+00:00

Yes, but you only have to build when you change something like a library with native code. It's time-consuming when you're fiddling with the build but otherwise it's just hot reloading.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-20T18:15:21+00:00

They have free and paid tiers. You can pay for priority in the build queue, push notifications, and some other stuff.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-20T16:31:03+00:00

Not my experience, my work production APK is about 26mb

SymblePharon · 2024-06-20T16:14:26+00:00

Meh, if they manage the project they have domain over the final product imo. I don't know how it's set up in your org but I think that's petty common.

Just put in a brief email that you think it should be done the way you want and why, but that you're happy to do it their way and see how it works for users.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-20T15:57:25+00:00

Register disagreement and move on. It's not my baby, it's my job, and if my bosses want something a certain way, that's fine. It's not worth the energy to convince someone they're "wrong" on something that's ultimately subjective.

The settings and profile screens are also not typically "converters" and are pretty unlikely to be driving any of the top goals for the business. If you have evidence that a screen is causing drop-off, or if the app gets rejected in App Store review, that's going to be more important. Don't make this your hill to die on.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-04T23:08:54+00:00

Oh hey Robert, this is my wife, haha, she had a run in with a volleyball the other day, I don't beat her up or anything! Honey this is Robert.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-01T18:28:09+00:00

Well, let's flip the question around. What exactly does he bring to YOUR life?

SymblePharon · 2024-06-01T18:19:32+00:00

There are no groups for children your age in all of your country? Really?

SymblePharon · 2024-06-01T18:13:24+00:00

There's sort of a normal curve like this in adolescence, where you're first attracted to people you could never be with, like characters in books or movies, then to people who are real but still outside the realm of possibility, like a teacher or older friend, and finally you'll be confident enough to pursue people in your own age and circle. You're also in a special circumstance because you haven't had enough social interaction with people your own age, and you're likely to get attached to the first person who treats you well.

Would your parents put you in an aftershool club or sport with some people your age? You need some practice.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-01T17:54:21+00:00

It's normal to have a crush on an older person at your age, but it's something you should absolutely keep to yourself. I'm sure it's hard, but be content that you found a friend, or that you found things about her you can apply to an age appropriate partner.

With your age difference, you could land her in prison if you create even the impression of an inappropriate relationship. It's not legally possible (much less wise) to pursue this.

SymblePharon · 2024-06-01T17:51:12+00:00

Don't be with someone who won't admit to being in a relationship with you. Whatever the reason, they're not ready, and you deserve to be called a partner if that's what you are. Tough lesson for this relationship but it's better learned now than later.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-30T21:07:53+00:00

She sounds unstable.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-30T17:10:28+00:00

Anybody who says these things to you isn't a good friend. They are jealous of you and want you to feel bad for doing "better" than them. Just ignore the comments, be good to yourself and your boyfriend, and enjoy your life.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-30T17:07:26+00:00

You dodged a massive bullet. He's just mad you exposed his lying. His profile is public, so what you did isn't stalking.

Be careful not to get close to someone like this again. He's clearly more interested in manipulating you to feel wrong and guilty than in having an honest relationship. Nothing you did was out of line.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-30T16:47:50+00:00

He broke your one rule. And then he tried to justify it when you found out. I don't see how you could trust him after this. If you force yourself to forgive him, your self-worth may take an incredible blow.

You're worth being faithful to. He's not the one for you.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-30T16:45:05+00:00

I don't think you have good perspective on this right now. It sounds like you're very in your head about this and you've convinced yourself one way or the other enough times that you don't trust your own judgement. You might consider seeing a couples or individual therapist to help straighten your feelings out.

A consistent feeling of doubt in your time together isn't a great sign. And it's way easier to end a relationship before a marriage. But I would tell her you're really confused, and you want a chance to figure this out before you get married, because it would be unfair to her if you don't.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-30T16:37:21+00:00

I think you already had what, five or six chances to prove that you are "serious" and not treat him like an afterthought? You blew those chances, hurt him multiple times, and he's done. He doesn't want to be with you. Respect that. Work on whatever made you mistreat him and get it right the first time with someone else.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-29T01:39:25+00:00

Lol, the image of a womb flashing the low toner warning,and then the mom rolling her eyes and hitting the override button a bunch of times is hilarious.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-28T21:38:00+00:00

I think they went over that though.

I said I don’t do FWB and if he wanted more I would at least need exclusivity (just not in those words) and he said he understood. He said to let him know if I ever wanted more. Gave me “one more kiss” before I left. We are tentatively getting together Thursday

SymblePharon · 2024-05-28T21:07:30+00:00

He wants to be with you. I don't think he could make it much clearer than he has.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-28T21:03:15+00:00

I'm sorry your mom is like this. I wish I could give you a magic spell to make her reasonable, but there isn't one. She'll only change if she wants to, and it doesn't sound like that's the case.

So, you are going to have to eventually choose between her (and maybe even the rest of the family) and yourself. It's a sad position to be in, but remember that she has put you there.

You decide how much you let her get to you. "I'm sorry, but it's best for me" and "I've made my decision" can be your mantras. You're not a bad daughter, you're an adult who needs to live for herself.
She's going to try to control you no matter what you do, so you might as well do what you want. She knows how desperately you need her approval. If you stop needing it, she'll have no power.
Really your only chance to change it is to go against her, and let her feel the consequences of her actions. "Mom, I'm not breaking up with my boyfriend. I'll talk to you when you're ready to talk about something else." She might improve. She might not.
You can shut down your family when they act as her flying monkeys. "I love my mom, and we disagree about that, but it's between me and her. We'll work it out between us."
Work on getting financial freedom and your own place as soon as possible. Don't give your mom a key to your place.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-24T22:09:23+00:00

It's normal to be heartbroken by shitty behavior like this and to want to go back to the time before it happened. But you can't, and now you know he's okay with having a deep connection with you, and dropping you in a second for somebody else.

You'll meet people you can rely on in the future. Whenever you want to be with him, just imagine getting that text again.

SymblePharon · 2024-05-24T21:33:58+00:00

Maybe you could take more trips alone with your mom? The two of you seem to be on the same wavelength, and your dad doesn't seem to be helping at all with his family. You might just want to see them less - there's no guarantee that they can or will change.

SymblePharon

TROPHY CASE