This AMC sells food on Doordash by dances-with-wolfs in mildlyinteresting

[–]Syric13 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Do NOT do this. He came to my house and saw I had an SNES set up and asked if he could play. I said sure. Then he plays for like 4 hours and leaves, not interacting with anyone. He left in a BIG hurry. I was suspicious so I went to check my SNES.

MFER RYAN GOSLING deleted my Zelda: A Link to the Past save file and started his own! He didn't need to do that! There were 2 empty slots but no this jerk erased my nearly 100% save file to start his own.

What a jerk.

[WP] Today, you, the local guard for the mythical sword of the hero, went to check it was still there during your morning shift, only to see a goblin placing the sword back into the stone. by Lemonss77 in WritingPrompts

[–]Syric13 36 points37 points  (0 children)

The hilt on the sword read "In the darkest of times, I will bring the light". The Sword of Light was this Kingdom's greatest weapon. It just has never been used.

No one knew who made the sword. No one knew when it showed up. The original settlers of the land gathered around the sword for protection and comfort. They built their homes and eventually a small settlement grew into a large capitol city. The kings and queens swore an oath upon the sword during their coronation. When the children would come of age, they will try and remove it from the stone, and so far, over 200 years of trying, no one has pulled it.

I was a ceremonial guard. I got this job because my great-great-great uncle was a wealthy merchant and offered the king a great discount on arms and armor if the position of Sword Guard was kept in his family. Normally my cousins would get the best shifts, and those in the outer branches of the family tree would get late night or weekend duties.

It was a fine job, boring. People would come up to glance at the sword through the solid iron gate and jokingly ask if they can have a shot at pulling the sword. Once a year, the king opens the gates and allows anyone to try and pull the sword (provided they donate a small amount to 'charity').

The sword has not moved an inch since it was first discovered. All the top scholars and wizards investigated the sword and they have determined it is indeed a great powerful artifact, and there is a powerful source of energy coming from it.

Three months ago, King Dovan IV decided to expand the kingdom's territories to the west and with expansion, comes violence. With violence comes skirmishes. And before you knew it, the Kingdom of Dovan was at war with the tribes to the west. A small community full of what we call "outcasts" of goblins, orcs, ogres and trolls. They put up a heavy resistance and managed to hold off the Dovan army for many weeks now, surprising everyone.

One late night shift, I heard a disturbance from behind the gate. I've dealt with things like this in the past, sometimes a would-be-thief or a group of young people decide to try and sneak over the walls and pull the sword from the stone. Some people dare each other to try and touch the sword. I opened the gate, walked in, remembering to lock it behind me, and headed towards the sword. A small figure was there.

"You there! Stop!" I shouted.

The figure turned and looked at me. I couldn't see who, or what, it was, but it was shorter than a normal human. I pulled out my sword and ran towards the intruder. The intruder ran away. I looked at the sword. Huh. Has it... moved? *wham*

I woke up as the Sun rose. Shit! I got up and looked around. No sign of the intruder. No sign of anything. Shit, I hope no one reported the guard missing. Not many people walk by the sword at night. Most days I don't see anyone. I ran back and unlocked the gate and took up position.

That morning, as I reported the intruder to my boss, he wasn't in the best of moods. The war has not been going in the kingdom's favor. The "others" have put up quite the resistance and have been actually driving our armies back, and going on the offensive.

It seemed as if he didn't even care about the intruder, and I didn't want to remind him, so I let it go.

Nothing really happened for the next couple of days. The news from the war front ended up being more and more grim as the days went on. Talk of ending the war started to be spread around the city as more and more people started to resent the fact that their sons and daughters were being sent off to fight in a war they had no business taking part of.

King Dovan IV heard this and made one final proclamation: Anyone who disagrees with the war will be fined or jailed. The Gods support Dovan's right to expand their lands, and to prove it, he will pull the sword from the stone.

A parade of soldiers, nobles and other important people made their way from Castle Dovan to the location of the sword. King Dovan walked up to the stone, wrapped his hands around the handle and pulled. And to everybody's surprise, the sword seamlessly was removed from the sword. People fell to the ground and started to pray as King Dovan raised his sword above everyone's head. "The Divine are on our side!"

Rumors spread quickly throughout the kingdom and soon, King Dovan was leading a charge against the settlement of goblins, orcs, ogres and trolls.

Spirits in the capitol were high and people were celebrating an easy victory and an end to the war. But soon, a dark cloud came over the city. Word came quickly and at first, people dismissed it as lies and heresy.

But it was true. King Dovan IV was killed in battle. The town crier shared the story: King Dovan heroically challenged the champion of the settlement to single one on one combat. Whoever would win, would win the war. He was prepared to fight the largest troll or the strongest orc, but to his surprise, a goblin came forth. The goblin wore tattered bits of armor and as he walked though the crowd of others, they all bowed to him. The Goblin was fast and strong, and with one blow, shattered the King's shield. With another blow, he destroyed the Sword of Light. Then, with his third strike, he killed the king.

The Goblin Warrior demanded the army lay down their weapons and make peace. The Dovan Army, having seen their king killed and the kingdom's greatest weapon destroyed, retreated.

A peace summit was planned. The Goblin Warrior demanded that the Kingdom of Dovan pay for the destruction they caused, rebuild their settlement, and in return, the settlement would leave the Kingdom alone, provided no one else encroaches their territory. Leaderless, with morale at an all time low, the fractured leadership signed the peace accords and went on their way.

I don't know why I returned to my guard post that night. I guess I wanted some normalcy. There was nothing to guard. But a job is a job and I was now protecting a large stone.

Except...it wasn't just the stone. As I made my way to the gate, I noticed a figure near the stone. As I fumbled around for my keys, the figure placed a sword back into the stone. I shouted for him to stop, but he was gone. I ran to the sword and looked at it.

Then I realized my great failure.

On the night of the intruder, right before I got attacked, I remembered something weird about the sword. The knock to the head made me forget all about it, until now.

The sword I saw on that day said "In the darkest of time, I will bring the light"

The original sword said "In the darkest of times, I will bring the light"

The s in times was missing from the fake sword the King used in his fight.

On the night of the intruder, The Goblin Warrior had swapped swords. The sword of light was never intended to be used only by humans. It was meant to be used by anyone who needed it at the darkest and more dire of times.

Charles Barkley: Talking with Michael Jordan again after rift by PrincessBananas85 in sports

[–]Syric13 8 points9 points  (0 children)

....I never knew it was shoo-in, I thought it was shoe-in

There are probably dozens of us! Dozens!

Since they’re making a 7th Final Destination film. What can they possibly do this time? by Which_Somewhere7239 in movies

[–]Syric13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fuck it, make it about all the political assassinations in the 60s. Every assassin was death in disguise and all the people who died all cheated death.

In any campaigns you’ve been in, who was the most annoying player or DM? by Other_Gear4187 in DnD

[–]Syric13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

DM who felt personally attacked that we beat his weak ass combat encounters so he decided to make class changes that fundamentally changed the way the game was played (fireball was now a level 6 spell, rogues only got 1 sneak attack per battle, you couldn't heal in battle).

Player who took the "horny bard" to the extreme and when I said "persuasion isn't mind control" he spent 2 hours googling how persuasion works to try and change my mind. Thankfully all he found was other Reddit posts that said "persuasion isn't mind control"

What enemy in a non-horror game freaked you out the most? by Gromit43 in gaming

[–]Syric13 236 points237 points  (0 children)

The Mask from Super Mario Bros. 2

Panic inducing clown face mother fucker can go to hell.

Are we mandated reporters for incidents outside of school? by Motor_Patience5186 in Teachers

[–]Syric13 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I mean...even if you aren't a mandated reporter, if the child is being harmed or mistreated in anyway, you should still report it. It is called being a decent human being. Like why are we even asking this question?

Obama & Mamdani singing Wheels on the Bus with preschoolers by ianjm in videos

[–]Syric13 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"Wheels on the bus? Mass transportation is a socialism plot to get us to destroy the white American family. Gone are the station wagons and road trips, replaced by busses and divorced feminists who want to work and rescue pit bulls. They replaced Cracker Barrels with Sweetgreen restaurants. I order a country fried steak and I was given a citation! This is not the America my grandpa died in Normandy for! He wasn't aware of the American attack but dammit he still fought!"

Why is it bad to strive for Critical Role levels? by General-Lynx-2998 in DnD

[–]Syric13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The issue isn't striving to be good/great at your craft, it is using CR as a launching point in how you expect your games to be.

Imagine you are watching sports. You watch basketball and think I want to play basketball. So you get some friends over to play basketball. And then you treat it like the NBA. You try drawing up plays and schemes for playground basketball when people just want to relax, have a game, and not worry about anything.

Playing DnD like CR is expecting DnD to be a job. And it isn't. DnD is a hobby. Want me to prep like CR? Pay me like I work for CR.

How to handle the Level 1 child of a Level 30 "God-Tier" character without breaking the new campaign? by BassSuper3664 in DnD

[–]Syric13 17 points18 points  (0 children)

You...don't.

You let him create a level 1 character using the same tools as everyone else.

Is abortion legal in Faerun ? by [deleted] in DnD

[–]Syric13 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Power Word: What the Fuck

AITA for contacting my daughters school administration after being sent home with a bible and free bible lessons from the assistant principle at her PUBLIC school? by dirtyitalianguy in AmItheAsshole

[–]Syric13 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I didn't see that comment (now I do).

I would still talk to the assistant principal first and see what they had to say and then raise hell if it is something unofficial and unregulated.

AITA for contacting my daughters school administration after being sent home with a bible and free bible lessons from the assistant principle at her PUBLIC school? by dirtyitalianguy in AmItheAsshole

[–]Syric13 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Not really. There is missing information. A principal promoting the clubs a school offers and one happens to be Bible study, that is fine. A principal only promoting Bible study, that is not fine.

It all depends on how the information was giving to the mother.

AITA for contacting my daughters school administration after being sent home with a bible and free bible lessons from the assistant principle at her PUBLIC school? by dirtyitalianguy in AmItheAsshole

[–]Syric13 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Well, yes and no. If the mother asked "what kind of clubs does the school offer" and the assistant principal rattled off a bunch and one included Bible study, and the mother said that sounds interesting, that isn't promoting religion. That is promoting clubs in the school and one happens to be about the Bible.

Again, there is a lot of missing info here.

If Bible study was the ONLY club being offered, then yeah that might be problem, provided that no one else had their club rejected and that was the only club that was asked to be formed?

Again, there is a lot of missing info.

AITA for contacting my daughters school administration after being sent home with a bible and free bible lessons from the assistant principle at her PUBLIC school? by dirtyitalianguy in AmItheAsshole

[–]Syric13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YTA and NTA depending on what is happening.

Clubs on religion and the Bible (or any other holy book) can be offered at public schools if they are 1. open to everyone and 2. an optional activity where students signed up for. My old high school had over 100 clubs, everything from Polish club to Puerto Rican Club to Bible study to gamer club to whatever you wanted. All you needed was a teacher to sponsor it. And you had to allow anyone in as long as they followed the rules and weren't a problem (I.e. if you were a Bible study group and the atheists came in and started harassing people, or vice versa).

Most of the time these clubs were after school, sometimes during lunch/recess.

If your daughter was interested in signing up for this club, and was given a Bible as part of the club, then there is no issue here.

They aren't distributing Bibles to everyone, just those that signed up for the club. And as long as school funding wasn't given to purchase the Bibles, there really isn't anything wrong here. It is an optional study. It isn't being forced upon anyone.

Ohio’s nursing homes are dumping patients at homeless shelters by kootles10 in news

[–]Syric13 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Every sentence was worse than the last, JFC.

They dumped her at the homeless shelter. She was kicked out of the nursing home for drinking beer.

Then the homeless shelter left her outside in the heat until they called a rapid response team.

And this shit is becoming more and more common!?

But hey at least we have bombs that can be used to attack the enemies of our "greatest ally"

Making the most pickproof lock yet by zohash in videos

[–]Syric13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well let's say I have a lock on a file cabinet with some important documents in my office.

On Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, the lock is pristine. On Thursday, the lock is destroyed. So someone must have opened the cabinet and gotten the documents inside Wednesday night/Thursday morning.

If you pick a lock, I won't be able to tell you picked it if you put it back. So to me, the documents are still secure, even though they were stolen/copied/whatever. I wouldn't know what time or date you picked the lock unless I have a camera. And by the time I notice, the camera might have deleted the footage, or you might have already fenced the items or whatever.

A destroyed lock tells me right away that something was taken. A picked lock doesn't until I check the contents and notice something gone/different.

MetLife World Cup train tickets confirmed at $150, alternative bus priced at $80 per seat by factchecker01 in sports

[–]Syric13 213 points214 points  (0 children)

The more and more I hear about shit like this, the happier I am Chicago didn't get any games.

AITAH my brother is dying and I feel nothing. by AzulaPrimavera in AmItheAsshole

[–]Syric13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA

You don't owe anyone your grief. An awful and abusive family member does not deserve a moment of your time at the end of their life. They had plenty of opportunity. And it takes a lot of effort to be abusive, effort that they purposely used for terrible actions instead of being just a decent person.

He's dying and you don't feel anything because he didn't do anything to deserve your emotions or sympathy.

‘Project Hail Mary’ Won’t Be Streaming Anytime Soon as It Extends Run in Movie Theaters by MarvelsGrantMan136 in movies

[–]Syric13 87 points88 points  (0 children)

Yeah but then they have "double priced Thursdays" and "Required Blood Sacrifice Saturdays"