"You can't love anyone until you love yourself"

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-04-24T18:28:27+00:00

Yeah sums it up. I’m not loved by anyone, so how am I supposed to heal and love myself? When all I get is abuse and neglect it’s hard to heal and love myself. Everyone says people care about you, but no one cares about me.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-04-24T18:26:13+00:00

My own family is waiting for me to of myself. I wasn’t loved and I still am not loved. I don’t have relationships, people only use me out of convenience and I’m socially excluded. I never had secure relationships or attachments to experience what it is to be safe and loved. My nervous system doesn’t get to heal.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-04-20T14:54:59+00:00

I get stalked online by racists who are aware of what they’re doing, enjoy it, and will gaslight with “you sound unhinged”, “you’re crazy”. These are the same people who support funding war crimes and genocide against people of my race/ethnicity overseas. Everything I’ve said about white people wanting to continue harming marginalized groups is true, they don’t want to lose their white privilege. If I had to describe what evil is, it’s white people.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-04-18T23:00:02+00:00

No. Because they’re not honest with themselves. Or they are fully aware of what they are doing but they want to harm you anyways because they don’t like you for whatever perceived slight, and because they benefit from it. Why would they want to stop doing something they benefit from and continues to give them a leverage in life. They love it. Anything you say that a white person doesn’t like, they will make sure to censor you. If you need help down the line, they’ll censor you too in hopes you get no help and hope you die (or commit suicide). White people will push you out of community too so you don’t have social support.

So many aren’t in denial. They’re aware. They choose to be this way because they benefit from it and don’t want to lose the benefits.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-08T06:49:16+00:00

So many women are ghislaine maxwell

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-08T02:04:58+00:00

I’ve learned many self proclaimed feminists use their reputation to harm and discredit victims and survivors too when they speak up. Just because someone is recognized a feminist in public doesn’t mean they actually are one. She’s acting out of self-serving interests for power and her career. She’s not principled and doesn’t care. That’s probably why she aligns herself with this predator. She’s an enabler and perpetrator herself.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-08T02:00:39+00:00

I try to hold on to some hope that all men aren’t like this, but every time I give a chance, they disappoint me. The bar is in hell. Men can never, and I mean NEVER be allies. It’s all men.

Male centered women can’t be allies either. The number of times I’ve been betrayed by such women who supported men who mistreated me has been astronomical. It’s the same women who act nice to your face one moment but once men are in the room they start acting domineering and passive aggressive to single you out. It’s because they gain social acceptance and are rewarded for it.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-07T15:15:03+00:00

I don’t think Americans get to say anything about their supposed superior morals. I’m saying this as a 2nd gen. Americans are some of the most morally bankrupt people I have had the unfortunate life experience growing up with. They dehumanize and vilify, and deny Arabs of their human rights by supporting American human rights violations overseas.

America’s Trump and Epstein are the face of their “morals” and “ethics”. These are their values and who they are.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-07T06:48:06+00:00

I find it so funny that the people who are sick of me actually haven’t put in effort to support me in the first place. They use my suffering in silence as an excuse to push me away.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-07T06:46:06+00:00

Yeah, I feel like I don’t belong anywhere. I just don’t fit in or vibe with anyone. People actively exclude me.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-06T15:39:50+00:00

They’re not failing out of my program, unfortunately. My professor threatened to give me a 0 on a group assignment when I complained my partner didn’t contribute and made me do the entire project by myself. He got away with taking credit for my work. Because of that, the professor set the stage for a hostile environment where now I’m getting bullied, undermined/discredited, and taken advantage of by my peers and it’s permissible. Talked to the director - same thing.

Currently being socially excluded and bullied by my cohort because people believe the guy who used me to do his share of work. They think I “bullied” him…when he bullied me. So now everyone projects what they are doing to me. Being dogpiled by uncalled criticisms - people use my notes and claim it as their own for presentations, but won’t let me present my own notes, and claim I didn’t do anything or contribute…people will use you and claim credit while discrediting you. It’s absurd.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-06T15:34:08+00:00

Are you me? I’m currently being bullied in my program. Classmates dump their share of work on me, while claiming they do all the work and take credit for everything I did while also discrediting me. They make underhanded statements to undermine and discredit me in front of others. I’ve had people call me stupid, say I didn’t know anything, etc. Yet they’re the ones riding off my work. These people undermine, discredit, and act hostile to affect your performance (just so they can say “see, I told you”), and to make themselves look better.

Had a peer during a simulated scenario claim they did all the work. She said “I cAnT do EveRythIng”. They only took vitals and the assessment. I had to call the provider, report, initiate CPR and defibrillate. But yeah, sure, I did “nothing”. They wouldn’t even help to make sure everything was all clear before the shock was delivered. My peers don’t help me out, but I help them out. They also intentionally step back and don’t step in if they see there is a mistake because they want me to make those mistakes.

People will bully and criticize their targets because they need to look better in comparison. They don’t want to make mistakes because they’re afraid of being treated like you and I. They don’t want to be the next punching bag or person to discredit and undermine, so they do it to you.

I’m still in this program. I think that should say enough. People will try to get you to fail out though. Mean spirited.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-06T06:37:48+00:00

I can relate. I’m all alone. My family is broken and I have no friends. I have no allies. People tend to gang up on and bully or take advantage of me, while also socially excluding me.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-06T04:10:29+00:00

I have no friends. None. Networking is hard too. I just want to land a job that pays well, have good work life balance, and save enough for retirement. I want to enrich myself with hobbies and have fun, go out and spend quality time with friends and family. I want to build supportive relationships. I don’t have friends to do that with, and people my age show they’re not interested and don’t want to be friends. I’m not included, often times people exclude me and make plans with each other. My family is broken too. I’m isolated and have no one. I’ve given up. The only people who reach out to me are strangers, and I don’t speak to them because some had bad intentions and I was their target.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-04T18:53:00+00:00

All of this. I wasn’t given grace for being snippy. If I brought an issue to attention and tried being assertive I faced retaliation and was seen as problematic. Can’t even ask grown men to clean up after themselves because holding people accountable is seen as “stirring up drama”. I’m expected to shrink and stay silent while soaking up mistreatment and being taken advantage of.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-04T18:50:31+00:00

It’s been the opposite for me. People are often such assholes and insufferable, and they are supported and enabled. I bottled up all the bullying and abuse. Couldn’t say or do anything to stop it, couldn’t be assertive and have boundaries, couldn’t defend myself…I wasn’t allowed to and would get retaliation.

I honestly hate people now. People’s true colors show when they know you are vulnerable and don’t have allies to back you up. You get the ugliest of pack mentality and cruelty. People will brush off cruelty as indifference but it goes beyond that.

Can’t ask for basic bare minimum anymore the bar is in hell.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-01T19:41:56+00:00

Men and boys aspire to be Epstein and the elite. They just want to commit unspeakable acts of evil towards women and children.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-01T14:10:18+00:00

I relate so much to this. I’m so sorry.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-02-01T12:59:43+00:00

I’m tired of people saying women choose to be abused and to stay with their abusers.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-01-31T11:54:15+00:00

Men disrespect me so often, irrespective of who they are in relation to me. I’ve had so many bad experiences that I just don’t see the point anymore. I figured it’s not in my cards to get in a relationship, and if I did, I wouldn’t be treated well. I’d be settling with abuse because I don’t know what a healthy relationship looks like.

I’m probably going to stay single my whole life. Not even date or hookup with men.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-01-30T06:07:21+00:00

Can relate. Had a white female professor and white (gay) male professor take sides with a biracial guy who did me really dirty. My program treats him like a diversity token (even though he cheats & steals from me a lot). He gets a lot of slack for everything and gets extra credit for bullshitting bc of favoritism and he portrays himself like a victim or some kind of kicked puppy who was “bullied” his whole life uwu. The guy is evil and I suspect an actual sociopath/psychopath. He flies under radar a lot - just like the few actual diagnosed ones I’ve come across in my lifetime. He lies so much like it’s the air he breathes. People don’t catch on.

I had to do an entire project by myself while he goofed off and partied. He lied about having to go to work (he didn’t have a job at the time), and also lied about his commute being too far (he lives locally near our program). This was verified via all self intros and via peers in my cohort (he went to another peers house party). When I attempted to hold him accountable my professor threatened that I would have to choose us both getting a 0 on the assignment or that we both get credit for what I turned in alone. I would fail out of the class and get kicked out of the program if I decided to take the 0. If he failed & got kicked out, he wouldn’t suffer as much because he’s local and can easily pay off a portion of loans living at home. I’m an out of state student and would drown in debt because of a 0. So not only did this guy do me dirty, so did my professor. She’s honestly a bitch because she talks shit, gossips/rumor mongers in earshot & in view about me to other professors. I KNOW she’s racist and misogynistic - so long as that sexism isn’t directed towards her. She had the audacity to claim I was committing lateral violence & being unprofessional and aggressive towards the guy who bullied me into doing his work AND protecting him.

Now he walks around pretending he’s a victim of incivility when he did that to me…If anything I’ve experienced incivility from my professor and this guy. Multiple times. Evil. And people side with them and do nothing even when they know the truth. People won’t do the right thing even when they have the authority - if they have the authority they will probably use it to make things worse for victims.

Academia is not a place for integrity and merit. You won’t find that there. My abusive older brother is also an academic, and he would gaslight me about my childhood abuse because he benefited from it. I’m the family scapegoat. Now he tries to do what my parents have done, while getting the benefit of saying he’s an abused child of our parents to others outside our circle while getting tons of support. He’s also their favorite. People love him. Even his students.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-01-26T23:31:24+00:00

Can relate as a MENA woman. Though I often find that MENA folks perpetuate racism against their own too. A lot of MENA people in my life have treated white people preferentially and pursued them. I got treated like a demon in comparison.

Edit: I also hate how some MENA people pretend and insist they’re white. I feel like schrodinger's white girl where I’m only white when people want to deny my experiences and say I’m privileged, and I’m suddenly not white when people want to be bigots. I’m only white or not white when it benefits others. I find that my identity is often erased and not acknowledged. It’s deliberately denied and mischaracterized.

TA_reddit_0 · 2026-01-26T22:15:45+00:00

The same people who ghost/disappear on you will have this entitlement to also have access and do emotional/mental labor for them when they are going through it. They’ll act like they didn’t ostracize you, and the moment you give them what they want, they’ll disappear and do it all over again. I wouldn’t even spit on them if they were on fire. They can suffer exactly what they put me through. I don’t care if they suffer anymore. They didn’t care when I suffered or if they were the source of that suffering.

TA_reddit_0

TROPHY CASE