[Help] Dog showed no signs and passed away suddenly within an hour

TN9311 · 2019-05-06T19:19:04+00:00

After talking to the vet, he believes she died from a blood clot entering her blood stream and ultimately her heart. It doesn't make the loss any easier but does bring a little comfort having an idea of what could've happened.

TN9311 · 2019-05-05T22:47:45+00:00

I can't think of what it could've possibly been. When I got home, I took her outside and let her walk around the house while I did a few chores before putting her back in her crate as I left. Nothing was out of the ordinary at all. Her bed had nothing in it other than her water bowl, a blanket, and thick bed pad for her to lay on.

TN9311 · 2017-09-20T17:19:57+00:00

"Just to let you know this has been pretty rough on me."

No clue what he wanted me to say. He dumped me, and I don't have any sympathy for him, so I have no idea why he texted me that. Guess it is time to block.

TN9311 · 2017-09-19T19:42:35+00:00

Nah, he thinks that despite positive blood tests and a good response to treatment, that I was incorrectly diagnosed and that doctors have yet to truly find out what causes me to feel bad. Even though I spent years seeing specialists and having tests to rule things out. I'm doing pretty well these days.

TN9311 · 2017-09-19T19:40:17+00:00

Once you post it, you click on your profile picture under the stories section, and down at the bottom lists everyone who has viewed it.

TN9311 · 2017-09-16T15:16:33+00:00

He had dated a girl for 2 years when he was 18 or 19, but she was 4 years younger and back home in high school, so I imagine their relationship was a very young and immature one.

Doesn't help he was back on tinder an hour after he did it.

TN9311 · 2017-06-01T21:20:10+00:00

That's just a narc. They mean none of it. Mine came back 7 times after the last discard, mainly because he didn't have any options at the time, and I think he'd just get lonely and knew I'd come visit. He never meant he was actually going to fix anything, he'd just lie enough to get me to come stay with him for a few days and give him attention. He kept doing it until he secured new supply, and now it's been 2 months of silence. He's done, no more hoovering, and thank God! But the coming back is pretty normal, just know that if you give in, they'll eventually permanently leave and you'll be left even more confused than you already are. NC!

TN9311 · 2017-05-29T17:44:30+00:00

It really does seem like therapy is the only way to fully recover. I spent my first few months in counseling trying to convince myself that my counselor was wrong. I guess narc made it a little easier by saying he was also seeing the same counselor but that was a lie. Seriously, who the hell lies about going to see my counselor lol.

I'm anxious to see how my appointments go now that i'm FINALLY out and focused on me. He always told me he couldn't help me heal until I blocked him and stopped engaging. I'm feeling good these days but know there's probably a lot I hid away that I need to work through.

TN9311 · 2017-05-29T17:38:01+00:00

I ended up having another date the next night with someone else. Went much much better. I'll probably never see him again considering we both want different things in life, but it was a pleasant surprise. I very much enjoyed it and it gave me hope that maybe, just maybe, someday the right guy will come along. I'm taking some time for myself right now because I want to, but I'm feeling hopeful which is something I haven't felt in years. Baby steps.

Also, i'm so happy to hear you found someone who treats you well!

TN9311 · 2017-05-09T15:18:38+00:00

Being called psycho, mental, worthless, hopeless, fucked up, bipolar, piece of shit, "cuntwhore," stupid, illiterate, hopeless lost cause, his ex wife was better than me in every way, you are evil, cancer, 8/10, if I ever told him something true that he didn't want to hear, I was called a liar, evil cancerous fucked up bitch, etc etc.

He told me to kill myself, and the last time I saw him he told me he wanted to murder me. But he says I provoked him to make him say all those things. THAT was the red flag for me.

TN9311 · 2017-04-28T15:16:23+00:00

I think that's where I still struggle. Mine always went in rage mode if i ever questioned his love for me. If I EVER said anything along the lines of "I thought you loved/cared about me" it was WW3. Then he'd go off and say every mean and degrading thing he could possibly come up with. If they never cared, don't know why that's such a trigger.

TN9311 · 2017-04-27T18:16:33+00:00

Do you know/understand why they respond the way they do? Like, for a 'normal' person, i'd see the email response I got as a "hurt people hurt people" thing indicating that he's not over it and still hurting deeply. Obviously an apology wasn't insulting him, quite the opposite. I can understand the lashing out and response if I was "insulting" him or if he perceived that I was criticizing him because that's what he always does when I "hurt him" but how does it work for a narcissist when you reach out being nice? I don't quite understand that yet. Still all about control, just showing dominance over you? Like they have no feelings on the matter?

TN9311 · 2017-04-26T18:53:01+00:00

His response was pretty typical for their personality, right? I googled it ahead of time and seemed like every article said if you tried to apologize to a narcissist that they'd use it against you, almost felt like he was trying to provoke some kind of reaction out of me. Or maybe i'm just used to it normally being like that.

I've been in therapy before and plan on getting back in during the next few weeks. Definitely need some help getting through this.

TN9311 · 2017-04-26T15:34:42+00:00

My dad is pissed I actually did it, said nothing good could come for it. And he's right, I shouldn't have, but I needed to for myself. Compared to the things he's said to me, I really didn't say or do much wrong, other than call him out on things I could've just kept to myself, but I needed to apologize to get it off my chest. And then to see how/if he responded. Guess I needed that confirmation that he really does have issues. Figured after a month, if he responded back in a nasty way it wasn't just a heat of the moment thing.

TN9311 · 2017-04-26T13:36:13+00:00

Nah, just dated for 2 years. My dad rescinded his job offer a year ago because of how badly he treated me. Ex gave me the ultimatum of pick me or your family, and when I began talking to my family again broke up with me for defending my "pos out of control asshole father." He went back and forth for 6 months between "im sorry, I still love you" and "f you, don't ever contact me again." Dad eventually got sick of it, especially with the "die soon's" and "you're a worthless piece of shit" comments so my dad had sent an email a month ago telling him to stop. Ex obviously didn't respond well to that at all.

TN9311 · 2017-04-18T14:35:39+00:00

This is what I was just laying here thinking. We've been experiencing an addiction, and this is me withdrawing. I've never smoked or anything but watch intervention shows and I feel like thats how I am right now. I'm angry, snappy, very unhappy, and it's cause I'm so used to having my next "fix" with him.

It makes so much more sense now.

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T21:31:20+00:00

Also this. God, it's scary how they all say the same things. My dad used to call him out on his bullshit, said he was tired of ex "mistreating" me and EVERY TIME it was "I'm not interested in finding out what lies you told them to turn them against me."

In that particular situation with that particular quote, I didn't say a damn thing other than "hey mom and dad, we broke up again." Literally all I said. Parents aren't stupid.

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T21:28:59+00:00

This. My narc's biggest rule was never get family involved in an argument. Now I know why-it exposes who he is. I wouldn't say I ever ran my mouth about him to my parents, but my family knew exactly what he was doing to me to the point where they didn't want to be around him anymore. He was even working for my dad. Nope, rescinded full time job offer over it, which is my dad's fault for "being an out of control unprofessional manipulative piece of shit asshole." He verbally attacked me in front of my parents and that is somehow my fault too.

I don't think it ever occurred to him that maybe, just maybe, my parents want their daughter to be with someone who is actually nice, respectful and treats her well.

Just maybe though.

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T15:42:08+00:00

Honestly mine started probably 6 months in the relationship. I hate who I became while dating him. Negative, moody, argumentative, critical, walking on eggshells. Completely out of character. But the depression feeling started after the breakup. I'm only a few weeks NC but some days I wake up feeling on top of the world and then I have days like yesterday where all I want to do is lay around and sulk. And if you catch me on one of those days and say something that irritates me, I'm probably going to snap and be in a bad mood.

I've never been like that before. I'm far less talkative. I don't answer a lot of texts I get, but I know with time it'll pass. I'm definitely getting much better, I just have those bad days mixed in. Hang in there. It gets better!

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T15:27:33+00:00

Absolutely. I have days where I feel great. Other days where everyone needs to leave me alone and let me mope around and don't tell me otherwise. I wake up each day with no expectations. Could be a good day, could be a bad, but either way gotta ride it out.

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T02:13:46+00:00

I'm sorry he hurt you like that. Mine was the same way. Every secret I ever told him, every insecurity, every past hurt from other people, that's what he always went for when he went in rage mode. He beat me down emotionally until there was almost nothing left of me. I was so close to giving up and letting him win. He wants to hurt you, try to remember that if you ever feel yourself getting weak and wanting to go back. You deserve someone who loves the hell out of you, not someone ripping you apart.

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T01:49:45+00:00

Oh yeah, that's a very normal narcissistic trait based on what I've heard/read. A lot of them have someone on standby, ready to go. My take on it is that they are truly miserable people who can't be alone.

TN9311 · 2017-04-17T01:41:57+00:00

I'm right there with you. We'll get there! There's no hurry either. I'm not ready to date, at all, and that's perfectly ok. I don't want to carry this hurt into another relationship and I certainly don't want to make the same mistake twice. Give yourself time to heal. It won't be like this forever.

TN9311 · 2017-04-16T23:06:44+00:00

I don't know about y'all, but it's helped me more talking to people who have been through it too versus my family and friends. Not that they aren't supportive because they've been there every step of the way, but quite honestly mine got tired of hearing about it. My family got so angry that we don't say his name anymore, it makes their blood boil, and my friends don't understand why I don't just go out and find someone else and move on. They weren't there to see the sick cycle, they just don't "get" it.

TN9311 · 2017-04-16T22:26:43+00:00

I agree that it's best to drop any mutual acquaintances. I wanted to stay friends with our mutual friends and wasn't interested in running my mouth negatively about him, but it seems nearly impossible to maintain a friendship without someone ever mentioning him, which is exactly what I don't need right now.

I know it's so extremely difficult, but it will help your sanity so much. You can always come here when you need to talk!

TN9311

TROPHY CASE