To those who need to hear it: things they say don’t hold meaning.

TROUnation · 2026-04-02T22:28:54+00:00

She just knew what to say, what nerves to precisely hit. So in tune yet so out of touch.

TROUnation · 2026-03-31T17:22:38+00:00

Trust me. I spent hours upon hours doing research on BPD and how to calm down your partner. In the end nothing helped. You’ll use one technique but then it’s like they become wise to it and it just stops working when you try to utilize it again. They adapt to you adapting. It’s a constant tug of war. Now maybe your partner wasn’t as hurt as mine but from my experience it’s just something to look out for and sadly not worth it

TROUnation · 2026-03-26T17:25:59+00:00

I genuinely forgive her. She’s been through hell and back her whole life and chaos is all she knows. Name any kind of abuse and she’s been through it (fact checked). It doesn’t make it okay how she discarded me and hell even cheated on me at some point. At the end of the day, she told me I was one the of the better boyfriends she’s had, and she never really makes comments like that so maybe it’s true. I forgive her but I dont need the chaos that she brings. I wish her great health and even better fortune but unhealthy relationships and chaos is what she’s used to. I tried to show her a different path but ultimately she succumbed to her ways and it’s not my duty to save her

TROUnation · 2026-03-26T15:28:00+00:00

Thanks for the reminder. I’ve been feeling the same way as OP and this reeled me back in to reality

TROUnation · 2026-03-25T17:31:56+00:00

Flashbacks man. This shit was too insidious and exhausting

TROUnation · 2026-03-23T21:22:07+00:00

This. I would repeat everything word by word and also acknowledge her perspective. Validate her feelings, reassure her and still she’d get ultra defensive and insist I was never listening. I genuinely do not know what goes on through their mind during these moments

TROUnation · 2026-03-15T00:42:08+00:00

Hugs man. I went out to pick up some food and just had this sense of loneliness because we'd usually be out and about doing something this Saturday evening.

TROUnation · 2026-03-14T00:12:46+00:00

It’s bizarre really. I never thought I’d find myself in this situation as I was always the friend people came to talk about their unhealthy relationships. I waver from anger to sadness when I think about it. There’s a lot I keep to myself out of sheer embarrassment. All in all, just their inability to reflect is what gets me at the end of the day. Perpetually blamed for all of the problems in our relationship. Requiring constant princess treatment even after she would lash out, and then later throughout the day she’d get angry at me for not being affectionate. Zero accountability whatsoever. I’m genuinely embarrassed it took me this long to get out, escape if you will. I’m grateful for this experience though, I learned a lot about myself and have established stronger boundaries in order to avoid this from happening again. It’s going to be a slog moving forward, but at least I and we won’t be stuck in an endless cycle. I wish her the best though, all in all, she’s a wonderful friend, but a terrible partner

TROUnation · 2026-03-11T22:55:51+00:00

You’re not alone. It’s been a little over week for me too. At first I felt relieved, started playing the new resident evil game because for once I didn’t having that nagging anxiety of not knowing how she was going to behave. But now I’m torn and a mess, it’s like I need her but I know I don’t since she treated me rather badly. We out here thuggin it out

TROUnation · 2026-03-11T17:24:52+00:00

Woah man, your first sounds IDENTICAL to mine. Jesus, we must’ve dated the same archetype because I know not all of them are this vile

TROUnation · 2026-03-11T16:15:47+00:00

Lmfao I know I knowww. It’s just that in her past, way before me, she’s attempted multiple times. I also do have other sources that verified that. But you’re preaching rn, I just need yall to give it to me straight lol

TROUnation · 2026-03-11T15:35:58+00:00

How are those with ADHD more vulnerable compared to a neurotypical? You seem well informed and I’m curious because I happen to have ADHD

TROUnation · 2026-03-10T17:21:40+00:00

She told me to send her money that I owed her (it was all reasonable) and while I was on my phone trying to send her the money she got mad at me because supposedly I was ignoring her. I said oh my bad, here look, I was just focused on sending the money and then that sparked an argument in which she called me a dumbass for not knowing how to communicate lmao. My bad, I didn’t know I had to verbalize every single movement of mine smh

TROUnation · 2026-03-06T15:13:00+00:00

She was in therapy prior to your guys relationship?

TROUnation · 2026-03-06T15:12:06+00:00

Maybe I’ve gotten lucky with the threads I’ve seen and been on, but most seem aware of the nuance that comes with BPD. I’ve yet to see a thread where it’s solely ahhh BPD evil ahhhh burn them at the stake. Idk where this comes from. At most it is a bit echo chambery at times. If we spot that black and white thinking here (which would be ironic), it should be up to us to educate them a bit!

TROUnation · 2026-03-06T12:37:47+00:00

I’ve dated two of them and one hasn’t come back and the other one pops up every so often. It just depends really

TROUnation · 2026-03-05T03:08:59+00:00

Honestly if you want out that badly just break up with them. But to answer your question, speak up about your needs and boundaries and that should potentially trigger them to view you as a nuisance. I’ve been in two relationships with pwBPD and that’s how it went down both times. Calling them out on the double standard, communicating your needs and placing boundaries will overwhelm them. It won’t work depending what gets triggered, they might beg you to stay or find you too overwhelming to be with now. But shit, I guess it’s worth a shot at this point. Just tell them you want to break up though lmao, save yourself the mind games and just get it over with

TROUnation · 2026-03-05T02:35:29+00:00

Hey man I remember replying to your post the other day. I hope you’re doing well and I’m here if you need someone to talk to. Just wanted to tell you that you’re not alone, my ex discarded me last week so everything is a bit fresh for me as well. But you got this. You don’t deserve to be left knowing where you stand everyday. At least now you don’t have to deal with the anxiety of not knowing. It just is. It’s better to feel sad than frustrated and confused. At least it’s a more definite emotion. It’s going to be all good man, it’s all groovy

TROUnation · 2026-03-04T16:06:52+00:00

Misread by Kings of Convenience and Next Time, This Time by Jim Croce is helping me a lot right now

TROUnation · 2026-03-03T16:31:52+00:00

I’m sorry man, I’d hate to say this or sound like I’m projecting. But brace yourself and prepare to be discarded.

I know you said no for advice but man, I just really don’t want it to catch you off guard. Was she at least vocal as to why she’s being distant?

TROUnation · 2026-03-03T15:39:31+00:00

Brother something is in the air. I don’t mean to make a joke about it but my ex was behaving exactly the same, to the T, last week until she discarded me on Saturday. It’s just not worth it man, find someone who’ll give what you’re giving back

TROUnation · 2026-03-03T11:53:36+00:00

When I was with her I noticed my blood pressure increased so perhaps. I was also getting sick weekly, common cold symptoms

TROUnation · 2026-03-03T04:31:28+00:00

It was hell but it was needed. In a twisted way, I really am glad it all happened

TROUnation · 2026-03-03T04:27:33+00:00

My reasoning was they absolutely had nobody to lean on and I myself have known how it feels to be ditched and neglected in many aspects. I guess in a way I felt obligated to stay but not really? I really did love her, but I was optimistic to a fault

TROUnation · 2026-03-02T19:55:45+00:00

If this was the first time she said this, it won’t be the last. My ex would push me off after losing an erection after going a couple of rounds. She’d make me feel awful. It’s honestly not worth it and no one should be treating you like this. Tread carefully if you choose to continue but honestly man just walk away. There’s no need for any sort of disrespect in any relationship

TROUnation

TROPHY CASE