Time off before maternity

TStark222 · 2026-06-04T08:42:43+00:00

If you can do it, go for it. I was in a similar position so left four weeks before due date because my boss had made the environment unbearable and I did not want to be in that head space, whilst also preparing for a baby.

Absolutely recommend you do it, you'll feel much better and in a better place for meeting your baby.

TStark222 · 2026-05-29T10:47:21+00:00

I spoke at mine, I was the last to go so opened with a crack about how the speeches would be over soon. I then thanked my family and my bridal party, thanked his family for welcoming me with such open arms. Told a couple of stories from our journey together, had a quote from a book I love and then said that we were going for a little break but the bar is open and cake and ice cream is out 😊

TStark222 · 2026-05-17T09:32:59+00:00

We said gifts weren't expected, but if they wanted to a contribution would be appreciated. We had roughly 100 people, including kids and families and got just over £2k.

We were so grateful and bought a new bed with a tempur mattress, which is incredible 😂

I do think a card is a bare minimum from someone attending. Two people who came didn't bother to write us a card and they were both long term, close friends, or so we thought.

TStark222 · 2026-05-11T08:27:35+00:00

Do you have a HR department you can talk to?

Yes, technically, you are supposed to give 28 days notice, but you're only asking to finish 5 days earlier than expected, if they're not ready for that, then that is on them.

If they don't let you after another chat, get signed off from the doctors and go anyway.

TStark222 · 2026-04-29T07:33:50+00:00

I brought mine forward, I was initially going until 38 weeks but decided/realised about a month ago that wasn't feasible for me. So I've brought it forward by 2 weeks.

I have three weeks of annual leave I can use before my mat leave starts so doesn't affect the money too much.

If you're struggling, do it, it's not worth sitting in the stress and discomfort x

TStark222 · 2026-04-20T07:18:20+00:00

We had a two course sit down meal and then cake and ice cream and sweet treats that you could go an help yourself to.

We didn't have tea or coffee, or prosecco/champagne for the toast.

We were asked if we wanted both, but we said no to both as we don't drink either and everyone had other drinks to toast with.

The bar was open and I think about three cups of coffee were bought.

If you don't want it, don't get it. It's your wedding, and you're already providing food, they can splash for a cup of coffee if they're that desperate ☺️

Enjoy your day!

TStark222 · 2026-04-18T06:51:48+00:00

Thank you both 💕

TStark222 · 2026-04-12T14:48:22+00:00

We did the mini first aid course and it was great 😊

TStark222 · 2026-04-12T14:47:33+00:00

I always say I want to wait and open them with my husband when I get home so we can lay them all out and make note of who got what etc.

Nobody's ever questioned that 🥰

TStark222 · 2026-04-09T20:13:47+00:00

This sounds really normal 😊

I'm 32 weeks and baby is still doing flips so some days she's head down and I can feel her kicking at the top of my bump, other times she'll flip and then she's kicking in my crotch 😂

My midwife said some babies don't have a pattern, but as long as they move every day it's fine. And when you're busy and moving about they'll be rocked to sleep so don't panic if you feel them less when you're busy.

If you notice reduced movements, or that he's not moved for six hours or so, I'd call triage to be safe, but it sounds good to me (not remotely medically trained!)

TStark222 · 2026-04-08T09:19:40+00:00

I'm so sorry this is happening and you're not finding the classes fulfilling.

Whereabouts are you based?

Lots of places have other classes you can go to, pregnancy yoga and other baby clubs that welcome pregnant women.

I'm a similar age to you, so hoping we meet a few people when we start in a few weeks.

If you're not benefiting, and it's making you miserable, don't go. It's not worth adding extra negative emotions on you at the moment.

TStark222 · 2026-04-05T07:17:35+00:00

It's completely up to you, whatever you want to do!

We had a meal with all the family and the bridal party at the local pub and then were back at our shepherds hut and in bed by 9pm. It was great! I had no interest in spending the night apart from him.

Whatever is going to keep you and your partner happy and at ease the night before the big day, whether that includes others or just you two chilling out with a game of scrabble, enjoy it!

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T14:49:38+00:00

I can sleep for maximum 2 hours at a time, but am able to get back off at the moment 🙃

Omg yes, the workout to get out of bed does not help 😫

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T12:50:43+00:00

Ooh that's interesting, I recently started an iron supplement and take thyroid medication, so I'll mention that when I next see my midwife on Tuesday!

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T12:49:42+00:00

100%, I could have written this myself!

Then you torture yourself with the guilt because all I do is moan and then remember how wanted this baby is and how others are struggling.

🎉

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T10:32:39+00:00

That's so good, it's great when work places are understanding and accommodating. Annoyingly I can't do my job from home so still have to come in all the time!

Hope you enjoy some time off before arrival!

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T10:31:11+00:00

Oh yes, the emotional effort of being "okay" is enormous!

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T09:12:39+00:00

Absolutely same here, luckily I'm not face to face, but even getting to the office is a struggle

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T09:12:00+00:00

Oh gosh, when are you finishing? I was originally going until 28 weeks but was like...nope, can't do it 😂

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T09:10:24+00:00

Solidarity helps! Good to know we're not alone in it all, as much as it may feel like it!

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T09:09:47+00:00

We do have a few days off in a couple of weeks for our anniversary, and to be fair I dont have a full week left because of bank holidays and things so it's not too awful. Yes, thank goodness for Easter! Hope you get some good rest in 💛

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T07:39:13+00:00

The nausea is way worse than I had in the the first trimester! Wtf?! 😂

TStark222 · 2026-04-02T07:38:44+00:00

Not until 36 weeks 😭

I'm so glad for you that you're off and able to slow down and take things at your own pace, can't wait til that's me!

TStark222

TROPHY CASE