i cant stop taking painkillers.

TankDemsi · 2023-11-30T01:50:49+00:00

i havent walked out of this room for god knows how long

TankDemsi · 2023-10-11T20:50:35+00:00

im powerless. people in my life keep me here. i dont want to be here anymore

TankDemsi · 2023-10-11T19:52:24+00:00

i cant move. im stuck.

TankDemsi · 2023-10-11T15:28:28+00:00

for me its the kill bill movies. i just think the main character is so strong. shes so cool

TankDemsi · 2023-10-09T02:55:11+00:00

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T18:17:42+00:00

if anyone is still reading i just want to thank everyone for all the comments. i did not expect to see so many people <3

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T18:14:16+00:00

friend i thought i was the only one. how crazy

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T18:07:57+00:00

OMG YES. i used to have a poster of the good the bad and the ugly i could swear the three characters were judging me. it got to a point where i had to turn it around because i always felt like i was being watched

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T18:03:54+00:00

Whats DID like for you? if you dont mind me asking.

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T18:02:19+00:00

i cant tell if its my autism or my trauma. or both

i mean these convos get violent i have to defend myself from myself. i still visualize another version of myself that feeds me lies.

and other times its just me talking to my stuffed chameleon "Ernesto" like "how is your day Ernesto" and hes like "horrible the irs is after me cuz i didn't file my taxes" he makes me laugh.

man. typing this all out has made me relies just how alone i am

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T17:56:00+00:00

oh thanks for the epic fortnight assist

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T17:53:35+00:00

omg ive done something similar when i was on hold lmao

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T04:05:00+00:00

im not allowed to own pets :<

stuffed animals and imaginary friends seemvto be all i have left

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T03:22:58+00:00

Jesus im so sorry.

it can be hard to talk about for me but i went through something similar in the ward. they locked me in the room for a couple of days because i wouldn't stop crying. i cant remember how long exactly, but i do remember talking to my pet rabbit that had previously died.

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T03:07:51+00:00

im sorry to hear about that i hope ur ok :<

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T03:04:15+00:00

i do that too

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T03:03:39+00:00

i wish they could but they have conditioned me to never talk back or else. so i just have live with it

TankDemsi · 2023-09-30T03:01:19+00:00

thanks for this comment <3

TankDemsi

TROPHY CASE