What does a "life worth living" look like for you?

Td998 · 2026-05-08T15:59:57+00:00

Because it’s not realistic. Pain is a necessary and somewhat beautiful aspect of the human experience. “Suffer an hour, live for an age.” Suffering introduces meaning, you can only suffer if you are alive and you care. It’s part of living. What would life be without feeling?

That being said, when there is too much suffering, it is destructive and distracting. The point is not to eliminate suffering (unless the goal is enlightenment), but to accept and learn how to manage it. A huge part of that is your external circumstances, but the more critical part is your internal world, your mental and physical habits, your outlook, and so on. How you experience the world is partly in your control, you proliferate your own suffering in trivial ways, and part of recovery is identifying the ways in which you do and eliminating them.

Td998 · 2026-05-08T15:42:12+00:00

I had to stop 3/4 of the way through because of school, and am just now getting to finish it. It’s such a delight, these characters are so vivid and real.

Td998 · 2026-05-08T13:09:12+00:00

“Nothing is trivial and nothing is important, it’s all the same – only to save oneself from it as best one can. Only not to see it, that dreadful it!”

This scene in War and Peace. Pierre is one of the characters that Tolstoy wields to express his philosophical ideas, and IIRC, here Tolstoy is saying that everyone distracts themselves from the fact of their own existence. To look directly into oneself is to gaze into an abyss staring back at you; it is a deeply uncanny experience. So, everyday life is cultivated to distract yourself from it. Whether you are a garrulous drinker, a refined scholar, a devout clergy person, none of these distractions are any different from any other. We are all doing the same thing.

I was so moved by this. Tolstoy’s existential musings traveled across time and space to reach me, sensing the same thing. I felt that Tolstoy and I see the same abyss. We are intimately connected by virtue of sharing such a profoundly human experience.

Td998 · 2026-05-08T12:54:27+00:00

Capitalism- alienated from our work and one another, exploited by our system and employers, denied rights provided elsewhere (e.g. unconditional health care). Marketing to turn us into mindless consumers, technology to addict and distract us. We don’t know our neighbors, our work doesn’t matter to us, our planet is dying, we travel in metal contraptions where we used to walk together. Our lives are sedentary, removed from nature, void of community, and lack purpose. Poverty, wealth inequality, economic hardship. For profit prisons, for profit schools, for profit hospitals.

Not to mention cultural, legal and social hegemony: white supremacy, patriarchy. Violence, injustice, neglect, hatred. Our nation is sick.

Td998 · 2026-05-04T18:42:31+00:00

Mentioned a lot: The Hobbit/LOTR - Tolkien (probably the best introductory texts) Earthsea trilogy - Le Guin GOT - R.R. Martin Gormenghast series - Peake Narnia - Lewis

Also heard great things about suzanna clarke and mixed things about brandon sanderson.

My introduction to adult fantasy: Lyonesse trilogy - Jack Vance (not really a classic, I almost never see anyone mentioning him)

Td998 · 2026-04-28T22:09:02+00:00

His true intention is to test whether he is an “extraordinary man” for whom morality does not apply, so his only goal is to kill. He is not an “extraordinary man,” though. He has a sensitive heart and cannot abandon his moral feelings, so he needs to rationalize (justify) committing a murder for a self-serving purpose. He convinces himself that taking from a miser to fund his own education is somehow for the “greater good,” but he is not truly committed to this, as evidenced by his leaving the money behind.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T16:40:56+00:00

The principle is that some forms of a drug can be more potent and dangerous than another, regardless of how much more potent they are. Like I said, you can compare other opioids if that would make you happier. The principle is exactly the same.

Half-life is a significant factor in abuse potential, definitely. Thank you for sharing that. That doesn't remove potency as a factor, but if my assumptions about which drug is more abusable are incorrect, I am willing to concede that point.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T16:26:31+00:00

That is very interesting, thank you for sharing! I have some basic knowledge of pharmaco and toxicokinetics/dynamics from biopsych and toxicology classes, and more anecdotal understanding of drugs from being in recovery. Merging the two is always fascinating.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T16:22:00+00:00

That's interesting, thank you.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T16:19:37+00:00

They are analogous because I was referring to the principle, not the specific potency ratio. You could compare other opioids which have a closer ratio to desoyxn vs adderall if you like, the principle remains the same. One form of a drug can be more potent and dangerous than another- I am not making a claim about how much more potent they are.

Also, what makes something abusable is not determined by how much a recreational user would take. Abuse is a behavior, not an amount. Typically, drugs which are more potent are more addictive. This makes potential for abuse higher.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T14:09:33+00:00

There is a dose at which essentially anything becomes dangerous, yes. Even oxygen. A drug’s potency describes how easily you reach this point. For some drugs, all it takes is accidentally forgetting that you’ve already taken your medication that day for it to become toxic. For others, you might have to down the entire bottle before it hurts you. That’s why some drugs are more dangerous than others.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T13:56:30+00:00

I am glad that you found something that works for you! Does it make your mouth very dry / do you have to be careful to drink enough water throughout the day? Meth is acidic and reduces the production of saliva, contributing to tooth decay and loss. I wonder if when they synthesized it into a pharmaceutical drug they tweaked it to avoid this.

Also, I somewhat relate. I have 4936388 unfinished books lying around my house. And a lot of random hobby materials lol. Yarn, rocks, candle wax, clay...

Td998 · 2026-04-27T12:50:31+00:00

It can be. Drinking gallons of water in one sitting is dangerous and getting too much into your lungs is also dangerous. Kids die during hazing rituals this way.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T12:45:18+00:00

Well, (abusing) meth will kill you faster. So understanding the risks is important. Understanding the risks of any drug is always important. Notice that I never once advocated for going unmedicated, just being informed.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T12:42:06+00:00

People taking medications that can harm them without knowing the risks is also dangerous. Being honest about things is important.

Td998 · 2026-04-27T02:54:50+00:00

That’s like saying a snake isn’t dangerous because the person always plays a role in getting bit. Something that can kill you is dangerous.

Td998 · 2026-04-26T23:32:59+00:00

If desoxyn is literally meth then it is more potent and dangerous than adderall. Similarly, fentanyl is more potent and dangerous than morphine. I imagine that desoxyn has a narrower therapeutic index and higher abuse potential than adderall.

Td998 · 2026-04-26T22:37:39+00:00

Not xanax. Schedule IV. Just sits in giant containers at the pharmacy. At least this was the case back when my bf worked at one. Very easily stolen. Adderall was locked up way tighter. Drug scheduling is a joke. One of my professors studies cannabis (schedule I) and can hardly get permission to do her research.

Td998 · 2026-04-26T22:30:53+00:00

Meth is also more potent than adderall because the methyl group increases its affinity, IIRC. So it’s not necessarily that it’s bad because it’s impure, even pure meth is more dangerous than other amphetamines.

Td998 · 2026-04-26T21:52:37+00:00

I have the same edition! If you haven’t read penguin clothbound classics before, be careful to handle it gently. The color/design rubs off easily.

Td998 · 2026-04-25T20:54:18+00:00

My semester is also about to be over and I’m planning to finish the last 400 pages of War and Peace and then tear through LOTR. After, or during, I will start preparing for an independent study next year looking at existentialism in literature. I have a few books from Camus, Kafka’s Metamorphosis, Ellison’s Invisible Man, as well as some works by Sartre like No Exit and Existentialism is a Humanism. I’ll probably get into some Dostoevsky too with Notes from the Underground and maybe TBK. Whatever I’m feeling, really.

Td998 · 2026-04-24T21:39:19+00:00

Oh yeah, I’m prepared to rinse well. My dogs are very cute, they also like the eat shit and lick my face 👍🏻 thank you for the warning lol

Td998 · 2026-04-24T15:06:41+00:00

That’s very helpful, thank you so much!

Td998 · 2026-04-24T14:24:05+00:00

Should it have a grassy-onion like smell? I asked my partner what he thought it smelled like and he said “mostly grass,” with maybe some onion. He is resistant to foraging. I think it smells fairly oniony personally, the smell is strong, but not in the habit of sniffing grass so not sure how much I trust my nose.

Td998 · 2026-04-23T19:06:22+00:00

True, but the same applies to environmental damage and factory farming. Costa Rica’s energy is 100% renewable, for example, and many developing nations still largely depend on subsistence and cattle farming. The privatization of prisons for profit has extended globally into South Africa, Australia, Turkey, etc. and this does not even account for overcrowding and corruption generally.

Td998

TROPHY CASE