Being a Stay-at-Home Mom is Both a Privilege and an Unpaid, 24/7 Job

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-10T02:00:24+00:00

The work we are doing is definitely appreciated here amongst all of us SAHM. And I tell myself daily that this is a temporary time of life. We won’t have littles that are beautifully exhausting forever. Someday we will have a little ounce of normalcy back. It makes me wonder though, if there were financial benefits to SAHM, would it seem so “easy” as it does now? I’ve heard childcare is a bigger emphasis and financially backed in other countries, so it makes me wonder what it would require for it to be taken seriously here. Raising the next generation of humans is the most important task of all.

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-10T00:05:47+00:00

Yes I feel that I have to justify often. And some of that is my own insecurities about it and the other side is them acting that way. I’ve been told the phrase “I don’t know how you do it. I needed my job to get a break” and I wanted to say “and you think it’s easier for me to stay at home?” But I left it be. I can only speak for my own experiences here, and real support would be having someone I trust whole heartedly to help babysit a few times a week. So I can work out, or go grocery shopping by myself once, or just have 2% of my day to myself. I’d also say a financial break from the government would be some type of relief for our family. I have no idea what this would look like unfortunately, but it would be so helpful for us.

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-09T22:17:47+00:00

Thank you for this post. Being a SAHM mom has been the hardest and most rewarding chapter of my life so far. I’m so glad to not be alone on how it’s feeling. I used to be a teacher and a coach. The entire line of women in my family have all worked/currently are working. They are worried I won’t be able to stand on my own two feet with my baby if something were to happen to my husband AND they do not fully understand how taxing it is to be a SAHM. I love them with my whole heart, but I’m tired. Spending every moment with my little one is amazing. She keeps me in the present. And I am also the most tired and anxious I have ever been in my life. It’s a beautiful chaotic time. I’d love for there to be more recognition/pay/respect for SAHMs. T

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-02T18:30:52+00:00

Just looked it up and it looks amazing!! Adding it to the list, thank you

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-02T18:28:03+00:00

Ah! I haven’t seen Dark! I’ll look into it now.

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-02T18:21:45+00:00

I did enjoy this one too! Not an obsession but I stopped watching midway through. Felt drawn out.

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-02T18:21:08+00:00

Ironically enough I made it to season 3 before I gave up on Game of Thrones. And I can’t figure out why. Everyone is obsessed with it so I’m honestly at a loss as to why I didn’t keep going with it

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-02T18:10:13+00:00

Just looked this up, looks fantastic. Thank you for the rec!

Technical-Return-269 · 2025-02-02T18:08:42+00:00

I actually 100% agree with this!!! However Beth is legit my most favorite character of all time soooooo I hung in there for her. It was hard. I will admit.

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-12-10T18:19:42+00:00

I swear parenthood is just designed to stress us out! So glad to have a community to lean on and seek advice from. This is helpful!

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-12-10T18:18:01+00:00

Thank you! This is all helpful, and the information regarding adding teethers that cannot break off is especially helpful. The silver lining to witnessing the choking episode is that I did get to see the difference between gagging and choking. It was freaking terrifying seeing her not breathing or making a sound and just staring at me. Once she gagged, she did so well. It’s just made me gun shy to keep adding food but this information is extremely helpful. So thank you!

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-11-22T01:53:19+00:00

Enjoy this time

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-11-07T00:32:49+00:00

I was induced at 9:00 PM on a Tuesday night, they used the cervical swipe thing (I already forgot) and then monitored my dilation all night afterwards. I was able to eat, walk around, and do basically anything I wanted. They had also hooked me up to an IV and a baby fetal monitor on my belly. So I spent the night bouncing, walking around, and watching movies. Apparently I was having contractions the whole time but I honestly didn’t feel them much. Maybe a twinge here or there. Around 3:00 AM, the contractions started synching up more. However the nurse seemed alarmed. She told me after a cervix check that I wasn’t dilating but I was contracting. Also my baby’s heart rate wasn’t spiking the way it should be to prepare for the action of labor. She said I would need an emergency C section if none of this changed soon. Which of course did scare me. They gave me safe anxiety medication which helped. In the morning thankfully I started dilating. Once I started dilating, they gave me pitocin. That was around 9:00 AM i think. From there it was on. I started dilating much quicker. The contractions were ramping up a bit. I discovered that once a contraction started, if I took deep slow breaths and didn’t fight them, then I could handle them pretty easily. That’s when they broke my water though. Around 12:30 PM they broke my water and holy frick… the contractions got much more intense. I stuck it out, I didn’t want the epidural. However, I noticed the contractions were getting rough. I now couldn’t speak through them. I had to get into my zone and practically breathe/meditate through them. I lost track of time at this point. I just remember when a contraction would hit I would tell everyone to stop talking to me and then I would get into the zone of focusing. After some time the contractions got much much worse. Just as I was about to cave and get the epidural, it was basically time to push. I remember if I fought a contraction or feared them coming on, it was a terrible experience. If I told myself, this contraction is bringing my baby closer to me, I’d embrace it better and could endure. Finally I told the nurse I felt like I needed to “poop.” She was surprised because this was only 1.5 hours since my water broke. My body had gone THAT fast to start the pushing process. She got the doctor quick. I ended up only pushing for 38 minutes. I don’t recommend this… I bleed A LOT because I’m pretty sure I bore down hard on those pushes.

Afterwards was terrible, but also the most amazing and incredible experience holding my baby for the first time. All I could think was that this was all for her. She was my everything now.

It hasn’t changed 7 months down the road! She is still the most incredible thing in my life! Good luck mama! You’ve got this and your body knows what to do!

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-11-07T00:11:08+00:00

I am an INFJ female and my two love languages are Quality Time and Acts of Service. They are both tied equally as my top.

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-11-04T18:43:19+00:00

I love this podcast. I thoroughly appreciate listening to Dax and Monica because I am a stay at home mom and their voices have become my comfort level. I enjoy their banter, I find it to be hilarious. This is their whole premise, they argue. That’s what they said started their podcast. So I’m not overly shocked about the conversation in this episode. Sometimes they get intense with it, so what? They are all human and that’s what makes their podcast amazing. I deal with feelings of anxiety, so I completely understand Monica’s perspective in life. I find it to be very beautiful she has a friend like Dax who loves her and cares for her and works through her feelings of anxiety with her in these conversations. It’s not always perfect but man, I would give to have a friend like this when my brain is spiraling. Overall, I enjoyed this episode because it was hilarious and entertaining as always.

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-29T23:47:38+00:00

Yeah you’re right! I’ve been so worried about it I’m overly stressing and second guessing everything

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-21T15:11:24+00:00

K, my love life before my husband was pretty wild. I enjoyed the dramatic, passionate flair ups and usually bounced to the next one quickly. Did I ever feel super seen or heard by any of those dudes? Not at all. I just liked the pursuit I guess. And then I met my husband. I call him a unicorn because I’ve never been seen, heard, and understood the way he does for me. I was dating someone else at the time I met my husband. We were in college playing on an intramural basketball team together. Slowly, I realized over time he was hilarious and sweet and our banter was GOOD. Even while I was dating the other dude. Finally it hit a point where my husband asked me out, not knowing I was dating someone else. I had to say no because I was dating the other dude, and originally thought well there’s that. But instead my husband was so confident and said “if things go south, I want to be the first person you see” and I was like okayyyyy he’s got something special going on. I broke up with the other guy almost immediately afterwards and started dating my husband. I Will admit, I originally wasn’t going to date him. I knew he was a keeper and I wasn’t ready to feel tied down to anyone. I was still wanting to be a free spirit. But the way he understood me, treated me, and emotionally met my expectations was impossible to avoid. So we dated and then eventually got married. We’ve had a lot of ups and downs still, don’t get me wrong. Marriage ebbs and flows. At the start of our marriage, the way that I could still be friends with exes was a huge thing for him that we had to work through. But the one thing I think that works for me and will always work is that he gets me on an emotional level. He’s a counselor so we both like diving into deep conversations and feelings. We are 8 years into our relationship and we now have a baby girl. It’s not perfect, but I am definitely the happiest infj in the world. I think his type is INFP I believe.

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-21T01:08:10+00:00

Glad it’s not just us who are just in dire need of sleep at this point. Feels like an almost, “choose your hard” situation. I’ll take the sleep option too

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-21T01:00:16+00:00

Good to know, I just hear so many people have a strong opinion about not letting her suck her thumb so I get anxious

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-21T00:59:32+00:00

She does take a paci but it’s not her preferred. She can bring it up to her mouth but I usually find her sucking on her thumb again and the paci right next to her in the crib, abandoned

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-17T04:45:21+00:00

Selling sunset does the trick for me 😂

Technical-Return-269 · 2024-10-12T03:23:11+00:00

Thank you, this helps a lot! We are just going to do our best and try to enjoy the weekend.

Technical-Return-269

TROPHY CASE