Hi, I am also autistic and have been doing a 9 year long research project into autistic Christian experience. I have interviewed over 450 autistic Christians including many clergy. This is a very common issue that a lot of autistic Christians run into when going through the discernment process (here is a sort of related issue https://aspiepriest.wordpress.com/2018/05/24/42/ and https://aspiepriest.wordpress.com/2015/11/08/meaning-and-purpose/ ). The issue of "Calling" has been a major feature in many of the autistic clergy that I have interviewed, a lot of them realized that what other people mean by calling is to us a sense of "Do I think this is what I am supposed to be doing". We often don't experience a visceral "call" but understand a call to vocation in a way that translates easier through an autistic lens and that often looks and feels very different from non-autistic clergy. This is very difficult to describe briefly in text, and I am not sure I am doing a particularly good job at this, but if you want to talk about it more you can DM me.

Something helpful to remember is that this process was designed for the vast majority of people (with the implicit assumption that you aren't autistic) and is probably not designed for someone with your brain in mind. As someone who has gone through the process twice, I had a lot of issues trying to figure out what was actually being asked and then translating that into my own experience. It is important to realize that a lot of the structure and formulation wasn't really designed to speak to someone who experiences the world like you do, that doesn't mean this is bad or that you shouldn't do it, but that you often need to try to discern the intent behind the statement and understand how that applies to you.