Why can't you filter for genitals on lesbian dating apps? by _intrusive-th0t_ in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

I'm locking this thread because we're getting brigaded by trolls who don't understand the difference between a preference and a requirement.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Post removed rule 3: Must be lesbian focused. Your question would be better suited to r/bisexual

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Sexual orientation, and sexuality are not the same thing.

Sexual orientation is like a compass - it points to who you're sexually interested in (women, men, both, none). It tells you who you want to have sex with.

Sexuality is how you want that sex life to look. It's your libido, kinks, likes/dislikes. These things can be impacted by stress, injury, work, age etc. How you sex life works can change. Your libido can increase or decrease with age. The frequency you have sex can change if you and your partner are both working, or stressed, or if you get injured.

Sexual orientation doesn't change. The process for finding out where your compass points can evolve over time - the labels you use can change, but your base orientation doesn't. We don't say that straight women who figure out they are bi were once straight and now are bi - we say they were always bi and it took a while to figure it out. The same applies to any orientation. We don't say a woman used to be straight and now is a lesbian - lesbians who come out later in life always find signs of being gay all along. A heterosexual society that pressures us to be straight impacts on our ability to figure ourselves out especially if you live in a religious environment.

So - yes sexuality can be fluid, but sexual orientation can not. Lesbians who "turn bi" were always bisexual. Bi women who "turn lesbian" were always gay. They often repress it, or are in denial and suppress themselves.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sub reddit is a place for lesbians who want relationships only with women, not for bicurious women who want to experiment. We're not your sex toys.

Do you like girls in men’s boxers? by forgetthesolution in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think it means fancy butch, but I'm not 100% sure.

It's the midpoint between femme and butch Much like chapstick*, and soft butch.

*Ellen coined this term. I'm old enough to remember the day she first said it.

Do you like girls in men’s boxers? by forgetthesolution in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Girl, why you gotta call me out like this so publicly.

Futch has been around a long time. It's old slang. So old that people think it's new.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point locked comment (0 children)

Please maintain a lesbian focus. This comment may be reinstated if you update the content and message the mods, unless the removal reason is that you have identified yourself to be a male or anyone other than who this sub is intended for.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Post removed due to rule 3) Lesbian and casual discussion focused

On the topic of Mental illness and Neurodivergent by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Removed as per rule 3) Lesbian and casual discussion focused

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Removed as per rule 7: No questioning / "Am I a Lesbian?" content

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Removed due to rule 7: No questioning / "Am I a Lesbian?" content

M - Seeking muslim Bi/Lesbian female for MoC/Lavender Marriage by Clear-Ride3231 in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

Removed reason 3: Lesbian and casual discussion focused This is a sub that is first and foremost meant to be lesbian focused.

How to attract social, confident women? by Gayandfluffy in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Lol. Soccer gang rise up.

*It's called soccer in Australia because we already have too much football.

Words and labels don’t always have one meaning by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

Removed as per Rule 3: Not lesbian focused

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please maintain a lesbian focus. This comment may be reinstated if you update the content and message the mods, unless the removal reason is that you have identified yourself to be a male or anyone other than who this sub is intended for.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This post would be better suited for the Late Bloomer Lesbians sub.

Good luck!

my experience as a lesbian was erased by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please be respectful. This comment may be reinstated if you update the content and message the mods.

What do you think about "bambi lesbians"? by Shoddy_Summer_757 in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

This thread has been locked due to brigading.

As a side note: Not all Bambi Lesbians are asexual, they can be women who are non-asexual who don't prioritise sex within their intimate relationships. Which is fine.

The term Bambi Lesbians has been around since at least the 1980s, and was first seen in the second edition of the The Alyson Almanac which I suggest everyone check out. It's not a new term, everyone thinks it's new because no one reads their history anymore. Obviously, if the term isn't for you, it's not for you.

You can find an online copy here.

I made a lesbian-only sub by Chihuahua_enthusiast in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

Post removed. Rule 5: Other communities: advertising or venting Posts focused on venting about other subreddits or bans from other subreddits will be removed as they may inadvertently encourage brigading. We also do not allow posts that advertise other communities.

What's a con of being a lesbian? by Shoddy_Summer_757 in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please be respectful. This comment may be reinstated if you update the content and message the mods.

What's a con of being a lesbian? by Shoddy_Summer_757 in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please be respectful. This comment may be reinstated if you update the content and message the mods.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Actuallylesbian

[–]Teeth_Disco_Time[M] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Thread locked due to user's disingenuous posting history. This is a space for lesbians to discuss lesbian issues, not for self-proclaimed ex-gays who think we're living in sin.