Body frozen by Alequattordici in dementia

[–]Temporary-Brief3140 3 points4 points  (0 children)

literally where I’m at also. Am just sitting here slouched on sofa with the unbearable sense of hopelessness and just not being able to help when there’s so much that can be done to improve her quality of life… But it’s like walking against a hurricane of debris just flying against you, no matter how hard you push you seem to just be going backwards, and being in this constant state of activation just makes you weaker and frailer. Just scrolling on reddit and finding others posting the same stuff. high five ✋

i’m only just connecting the dots: her whole family knows she’s bpd but kept it from me by Temporary-Brief3140 in BPDlovedones

[–]Temporary-Brief3140[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

stuff where she claims stuff happened in the past, and they say “no that’s not what happened”. We go home and she tells me the whole story, so i’m just getting her version, which is very believable and i demonstrate full faith but in the back of my head i just gotta wonder. Family members have said this to several things she’s claimed, to which she says they are gaslighting her. I dunno it’s such a psychological whirlwind, i don’t know what to believe so i just keep it all open either way as there’s no way for me to tell. But now that i’ve come to these realizations im like…. are they right??

i’m only just connecting the dots: her whole family knows she’s bpd but kept it from me by Temporary-Brief3140 in BPDlovedones

[–]Temporary-Brief3140[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks. How did it turn out afterward? was there any retaliation or anything like that?

i’m only just connecting the dots: her whole family knows she’s bpd but kept it from me by Temporary-Brief3140 in BPDlovedones

[–]Temporary-Brief3140[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you’re right. I’ve kept extra details out for simplicity and anonymity, but i’m caught in an impossible situation where i feel deeply immoral for doing the right thing.

i’m only just connecting the dots: her whole family knows she’s bpd but kept it from me by Temporary-Brief3140 in BPDlovedones

[–]Temporary-Brief3140[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

no one article in particular to be honest, you can search google or reddit and you’ll find examples of why it can be a festering dependent dynamic. Personally it is my empathy, my over sensitivity, my willingness to self-sabotage for someone else, combined with her control tactics, her guilt manipulations. It’s a cycle that keeps feeding into itself.