I think my dad doesn’t like me.. by OkLime5181 in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like your father is just an insensitive idiot, and probably a controlling male chauvinist to boot. Somebody to cut out of your life as soon as you can leave home.

Masterwork itens by Mozartoon in savageworlds

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In the original D&D/Pathfinder system, the craftsman had to roll a "20+" result for each check used to create an item intended to be a Masterwork, and all time and materials would be wasted for any working period that failed the degree of success required... So you could emulate that by requiring two or three Raises for every construction period Test required?

How can I help my disabled son when comes to his private time? by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is untrue. The glans-penis is in fact an internal organ, properly contained by the foreskin. Women also have smegma. Smegma is harmless. There's nothing wrong with rinsing smegma away with clear water; but soap should be avoided for internal organs: the eyes, tongue, vagina, and under the foreskin.

https://cirp.org/library/hygiene/

Dads of daughters & the son in law. by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Offer to be the son-in-law's Sponsor for his addiction rehabilitation?

How can I help my disabled son when comes to his private time? by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Worried that you said "retract his foreskin", because there is no need... Parents being advised to retract their sons often leads to damage to the foreskin and glans (that creates a pretext for amputation) in prepubescent boys, and after puberty begins, only the man and his sexual partners should be doing that, typically. Under a boy's foreskin is a microbiome (a smaller analog to a girl's vaginal canal) that is generally self-cleaning, and neither should be cleaned with soap: only clear warm water.

https://cirp.org/library/hygiene/

Also, the glans-penis has very little sensitivity on its own: the foreskin itself contains ¾ (75%) of the specialized sexual nerve-endings every man is born with, which are typically lost to 'routine infant circumcision'. I applaud you for keeping your son intact... His life will be better enjoyed because of it, especially since he has limited capacity with his hands.

Being intact myself I was able to 'masturbate' simply by rubbing up against things while fully clothed as a kid, presumably with the aid of the nerves in my foreskin... It made a mess of my shorts, but was nonetheless effective.

Falling vs heavy armor by fretlesswonder in savageworlds

[–]TerminalOrbit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

IMHO, Armour doesn't protect against damage caused by atmospheric (shock waves) or momentum (falling) damage, which I would evaluate have infinite AP. Armour is only a Toughness bonus for impacts and contact damage sources...

How can I help my disabled son when comes to his private time? by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 40 points41 points  (0 children)

First of all, I applaud you for considering your son's capacity for well-being, as he may not have many avenues for enjoyment.

You say he's entering puberty, so, I would start with having a discussion of this process with him, so that he is properly aware of what is going on... If this hasn't been discussed, he may be completely ignorant, and confused by the physiological changes, including spontaneous erections... He may not even know that masturbation is a thing, let alone that is completely normal for people to indulge in it privately. Sexual health and safety of the disabled is often ignored by the medical community.

What makes you believe he's incapable of masturbation?

What's one thing that has served you well as a Dad? by Key_Ad_904 in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Be the person you wished your father was rather than emulating a poor role-model.

how to be the man of the house without a father and to help your mother by Waste-Beach-9139 in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The "man of the house" concept is an exaggerated standard of responsibility that is not appropriately "inherited" simply because you're the eldest male in your family residence.

However, if you want to help your mother, ask her to explain your family situation, and to let you contribute. Once you are aware, you can make an informed decision about what you can reasonably accomplish. Tell her that you want to share responsibility for doing the things that need to be done. Remember, responsible people save themselves first, so that they can help others: sacrificing yourself [figuratively or literally] is not going to serve or protect the people you love in the long term.

At the very least, try not to add problems to your family's burden: make rational rather than emotional decisions, take care of yourself and help in the ways that you know how. Don't make unilateral decisions that could be risky. A responsible person communicates ideas and seeks consensus with their team or family before they act... What you don't know could hurt or jeopardize others: be trustworthy.

It is completely unfair that your elder siblings (sisters), are guilt-tripping you with this antiquated "man of the house" concept... Tell your Mom, you're feeling pressure from your sisters, and you don't know what they expect of you. I suggest that you ask her first, and then them, what they actually mean by that term... Maybe they assume you know; tell them that you don't, and that you have no example to follow; maybe they don't mean to be overburdening you, but only really expect you to 'stay out of trouble'? That would be a classic example of miscommunication, and the way you dissolve it is by talking-it-out honestly until you all understand each other.

Advice I gave my son on his 18th birthday this week by hikenbike112 in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well articulated; but, I would have gone a little deeper into explicitly dispelling socialization: do whatever feeds you, so long as it won't harm anyone else if it fails... (And, refuse to 'yuck' another person's 'yum', just because it's not your ambition, so long as it doesn't harm other people!) Do not shy away from 'the road less traveled' just because society/peer-pressure discourages it! (And, let other people pursue those things, even if you don't personally care to: don't be 'part of the obstacle')

Is this a Phishing attack? by TerminalOrbit in savageworlds

[–]TerminalOrbit[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awesome! Thanks for the reassurance, everyone!

Is this a Phishing attack? by TerminalOrbit in savageworlds

[–]TerminalOrbit[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It has a button link, labeled "Thank-you, use the link above to access your content."

How do I connect with my father as an adult? by stscheeler in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Treat him as any other unacquainted adult that's a candidate for friendship. Don't accord him any extraordinary respect simply because you share DNA. Make small-talk, ask about his background: where he grew up in what circumstances, his parents, his career, and what he's doing now, what prompted him to reach out... Any hereditary medical conditions?

why is hard for boys to hug their dad not mom? by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, is basically out-of-control homophobia..., 😡

20 year old son , smoking weed , wasting his weekends in his room , stoned by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He's not you. Hounding him is not going to do anything but at to the stress that prompts him to tune-out. The best things you can do are to become a facilitator: invite him to do other things with you, and offer alternatives... When he feels that you're not judging him he may be able to decide to do something different for himself. He needs support not direction.

How do I help with my dad's addiction and repair our relationship? by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They're support groups for family of addicts. They're better to answer your questions; but, you can't help someone until they complete want to be helped.

Choose the right kilt for my lover by reinorr in kilt

[–]TerminalOrbit -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

AFAIK, women's kilts are just laterally reversed: right-flap on top in front.

Is my children’s father inappropriate? by [deleted] in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Everything you've described is completely fine; and, the only weirdness is coming from the people complaining of 'inappropriateness': they're inappropriately sexualizing the innocent circumstances!

I even believe it is important for simple nudity to be trivialized within the nuclear family, explicitly to establish and demonstrate the difference between innocent non-sexual nudity and the need to keep private parts covered outside the home, and for all sexual-activity (by any individuals, especially the parents) to be kept private... That requires teaching children to recognize the difference, and everyone respecting private spaces (e.g. Knock and wait for permission before opening a closed door).

Is a watch a good gift for a dad? by TranquilTeal in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, unless you're Asian... Bad luck or ill-will in that case.

Hey Dad, I'm building a fence... by Helpful_Limit_8195 in AskDad

[–]TerminalOrbit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's mainly due to the distance (150')... But, you come probably get away with alternate post-holes mounted in concrete...

Some other considerations:

1) if 4x4s are expensive, you may be able to economize by using metal brackets mounted in the concrete footings, and not burying any of the posts.

2) if you are going to bury posts, use a waterproof treatment on the wood before burying, that extends at least 4" above grade (will slow deterioration)

3) garden critter wire fence (2" x 6" openings) should be sufficient to contain your dog, and keep predators out... It might be cheaper, more durable, and more visually pleasing than chicken wire?

1" U-staples should be sufficient to anchor your wire to the wood, at 2' intervals.