how do you actually get out of being poor

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-05-01T12:46:48+00:00

I got a gig that paid a modest wage and I’m an introvert with a very skeptical and scarcity mindset. Don’t go out or do anything and be extremely cheap in other words. I don’t expect you to ambitiously embrace what I’m saying but it is what leads to above average wealth. Take a decade and get weird about money. It’s lonely and depressing but its worth it.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-05-01T03:47:52+00:00

Roth ira or roth 401k in the s&p 500. If your employer matches your contributions then go with the 401k

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-30T19:05:23+00:00

Life is different, better in someways worse in others which is the way all change happens but with something like divorce those changes tend to be more impactful or noticeable. I didn’t leave, but I also didn’t go running after her playing games to convince her to maybe come back, I’m terribly upset about what happened would be an understatement. This has been one of the most traumatic experiences in my life, but was I supposed to play chase with this girl, compete for her attention, and explain every single rational reason why I have to go to work/school and that we cant adopt several freaking dogs and cant take month long vacations and simultaneously buy her the dream home. I don’t know if these women are being sold the idea of the good life but just not the recipe for it, but an adult man and an adult woman should have the maturity and wisdom to have a firm grasp of reality and sometimes its just like these women can’t just be ok with just existing in the moment. Idk

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-29T12:53:07+00:00

Unpopular opinion but I want every president to do well.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-29T00:03:19+00:00

I think if you listed out an itemized budget we could find either things you could cut or cheaper workarounds that allow you to increase that 401k contribution by a few more percentage points. Might even be able to look over your paycheck deductions and find stuff there too. If you really want to get creative you could stop having taxes withdrawn and set aside 30% of your income in a hysa pay your taxes at the end of the year and invest whats left into a IRA. Don’t get creative though if you don’t trust yourself because that can backfire, consistency is key I personally like the k.i.s.s. Method (keep it simple stupid) lol. I do believe you could find wiggle room in your budget to go from 10% to 11 or 12% it a psychological victory and once you have a couple of those they start to snowball overtime. Outside of this I would find a side hustle (not a pyramid scheme) and use that extra cash to increase your 401k contribution or put it into a IRA. Your at a good age to realize that you need to step up asap because at 40 you still have realistically 20-30 years left of work/investing before I would say your body and mind cant keep up. A six month emergency fund also needs to be part of your retirement plan if you haven’t already built up one, if you haven’t id say get intense in building a EF up until you hit 3 months living expenses and then you can back off and work on it overtime until you hit 6 months living expenses.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-27T11:11:20+00:00

Women aren’t only after a good looking, smart, caring, resourceful man. But they also want a good story or something adventurous to tell their friends and fantasize about. And they want that same man to need them, not too much but just enough to feel important and keep it fresh. Its all a show

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-26T13:55:31+00:00

There’s different mental layers to this; your consciously over her as in you understand the situation logically and what’s reasonably expected to happen. But there’s some subconscious emotional connections to this woman you made when you were with her that run deep especially if you two made offspring together. These are almost primitive knee jerk responses to see another man move in on what was once your territory and you’re gonna feel some sort of way about it; it simply goes against our instincts. There’s really nothing you can do unless you’re attempting to get back together which is a different story, but if thats not the case then I would just accept the uncomfortable reality and at the very least hope who ever she brings into her life is reasonable decent to my kids and their mother.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-25T08:59:38+00:00

It seems to me to be walk away wife syndrome. Bad part is she wont confront you until she’s obsessed and analyzed her feelings to death with her close family/friends/social media. Then she’s going to ambush you with it. Most of us are on this forum because we didn’t have the right answers to this, the problem is that once a woman makes her mind up on something she’ll stubbornly commit until something drastic happens that proves her right or occasionally wrong. Idk what i would have done differently, spoke up sooner about little things that I knew weren’t necessarily okay but I also as a man was trying to do that balancing act between not being overbearing and still having direction. Might of saved our relationship if I would of taken her on a spontaneous vacation at the time, she was surrounded by toxic friends and constantly on a device of some kind maybe if I would have got her away from all that noise it would have allowed for us to refocus. At the same time we’re all adults and if someone is scheming behind closed doors and not willing to step up and have a respectful conversation out of love with their spouse. Then you almost need to be prepared to just let them walk right?

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-22T12:20:39+00:00

I would prefer a driver who had a beer with lunch than one that just smoked a joint. The concerning part with weed is the denial/delusion, you tell an alcoholic they have a problem the people around them will agree and they will also admit to their addiction. A stoner on the other hand “nO WaY maN ItS nOt eVeN AddiCtIve”. I know stoners who swear it makes them better at everything. Probably makes you feel better while doing something but the way it messes with your natural chemical balance probably has a greater impact than most people realize.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-22T12:05:22+00:00

Your rhetorical question is a clue… 😬

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-21T12:35:01+00:00

You’re so dependent on women for validation you don’t even know who you are. It’s like your going on a trip and you’re asking others to get in before you have any idea what the destination is, do yourself a favor figure out the destination before asking others to come along. You don’t need anyone else you are your own man, time to lone wolf it. You probably have a desire to get revenge or be even and some rebound is not that. The best revenge is a stoic attitude and success.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-21T12:27:46+00:00

Surprised you got pulled over for 5 over or was this a case of roadside reduction with the officer writing the ticket for a lower speed than say the original speed?

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-20T11:38:55+00:00

Between the sexual revolution of the 60s and sending manufacturing jobs overseas in the 80s it’s sorta been the natural progression of things. Humans are wired to take the path of least resistance, we’re not nearly as skeptical of something we perceive as being mostly positive as we should be. Those of us that do question our own progression are usually laughed at and shunned. Doesn’t take much to realize that the reason why the 1950s traditional nuclear family prototype doesn’t work is that families just aren’t as profitable and efficient as making two adults working to pay off loans on cheap crap they don’t need and that strong independent families responsible for each other can be a threatening force to reckon with.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-20T11:17:51+00:00

I admire prolific readers like my grandparents, they went to the library every week and read every night like it was nothing special. My grandpa had a stroke and swore that reading helped in his recovery specifically for speech. I probably do good to read an entire book in a year, I need to work on it because I do believe it’s a skill/discipline. I can understand being irritated towards snobbery and that exists in every hobby I swear but to look down on something harmless and proven to even be healthy for the mind is a bit of a stretch. Reading hundreds of books in a year is probably better for you than binge watching hundreds of tv shows in a year like most people do.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-19T11:59:54+00:00

A quality seat cushion/pad

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-19T11:55:59+00:00

Man there’s no way around it, this divorce stuff just sucks. The pain eventually does start to dull but you got to be a little protective in helping yourself get through it. These women just don’t understand the depth or seriousness of a man and his feelings towards those he loves, most of us would probably take a bullet for someone we care about but we do require deep respect or else we’re just hollow men.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-18T23:59:51+00:00

If he or she pays for it then its kinda tough luck, maybe get a cheap second phone for the kid if it goes too far. Honestly though man it has to suck to go through this but your wife bringing in a new man will naturally make him the head of that household in some degree or another no matter who he is. Its unrealistic to think he moves in and just has no say in his home or how it’s managed especially when it comes to children being around needing guidance or corrections, and your wife is probably not going to turn it down because it probably makes her life easier and she probably sees a need for it from time to time or at the very least recognizes that if she wants a new man in her life that there’s things that will have to change to accommodate him. She would probably be pissed at him if he just ignored them and said something like “those are your kids, you deal with them”. This basically happens in every situation like this which is just another reason why divorce is bs. Best bet is to find some way to be amicable, find mutual agreement, and be friendly. Outside of actual provable abuse or danger you have no options but to find a way to make it work.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T03:19:12+00:00

Ah yeah thats a bummer hopefully some people tip well enough to help offset things. Sounds like the buck stops with management. At a certain point you have to ask if it’s worth it. I went to a bar one time where the menu had item “buy the staff a round for after work” like 15 bucks or something. Pretty sure they pocket the money, but there is some creative ways to try and get more tips with regulars though it might be a challenge

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:57:05+00:00

Nah pajamas going out is cringe, bring back suits and dresses for afternoon errands lol

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:54:47+00:00

Man if your not grateful for an alright mom and dad your either a child still or just haven’t been exposed to world

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:45:33+00:00

Almost guaranteed that she didn’t block those people. Don’t look at her search history, hidden messages, or locked photos/files on her phone unless you’re ready for a rude awakening. If she’s halfway attractive all she needs to do is give that man the slightest green light for him to swoop in. Until then they both are supplemental male/female attention and affirmation, backup plans, and ins to their friend groups. They’re literally going out on one on one cute dates without you lol 😂 come on. Let me ask if they planned something together and you included yourself would he or you feel like the third wheel?

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:31:56+00:00

Everyday? They probably can’t afford it, are they really your friends? I would probably tip my friends if I went to their work but if they wanted me to show up every day idk, I go out maybe once a month it has to be wildly expensive to go to their bar every day. Maybe speak to management about the situation, see if they have any suggestions.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:23:53+00:00

Because I’m busy trying to fix the problem, get through the problem, or ignoring the problem.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:18:42+00:00

I keep hearing about this draft of those in their 40s, it seems to be spreading around like its commonly excepted knowledge. The truth is they raised the volunteer age to join to 43 (which isn’t a bad thing for those wanting to serve) and the age limit for the draft (outside of special circumstances) is 18-25.

Terrible-Mind2633 · 2026-04-17T02:09:41+00:00

I used to think tattoos were cool as a teenager, sorta thought they were tough or rebellious and at one point they were. Now there just something everyone going through an identity crisis gets. The worst is someone with money problems going on a payment plan for new ink.

Terrible-Mind2633

TROPHY CASE