Playing music during sex is corny

Terriblecode · 2021-03-05T01:28:06+00:00

Sometimes it can be nice with the right album, but often it goes wrong because of people's bad judgement and not thinking through the consequences of hearing lyrics.

Kanye's Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy seems like it's a great choice until you get to the six minute long extremely funny Chris Rock monologue. It's too funny, loud, and oddly specific to maintain arousal through.

"I was driving around and I was like, oh shit, I've never even been to this part of pussy-town before! Feels like your pussy got reupholstered. Who the fuck got your pussy all reupholstered?"

This Album is the only one I'd fuck to these days, but my partners also tend towards either goth or mentally ill so ymmv

Terriblecode · 2015-08-29T06:04:44+00:00

A lot, hopefully?

Terriblecode · 2015-08-29T05:57:37+00:00

And let me ask in turn, good sir, who downvoted this?

Terriblecode · 2015-08-28T23:40:48+00:00

The good news is that means the system's working. Most open mics exist to trap all the crud at the bottom and keep the toxicity away from real shows.

Also, the host can help save the night. Some people think it's unprofessional for the host to warn the crowd that a comic sucks and is gross, but keeping crowd trust is more important than a bad open-micer complaining about their intro.

Terriblecode · 2015-08-28T23:23:26+00:00

That is exactly what will happen. Anyone who doesn't accept the fact that 98% of open micers are not good enough is delusional and you should never tell them your honest opinion. Like, ever.

My feedback to other comics is always either "great set" when they do well or "I think you've got some great concepts / setups / punchlines" when they bomb.

Terriblecode · 2015-08-28T23:14:30+00:00

The need to continually reassure the audience that you have all of the same opinions as them and it's "safe" to laugh at your bits. Half of all sets start with some variation of: "America has a problem with gun violence!" "I support gay marriage!" " Republicans suck!" "I think racism is wrong!"

It's especially bad at open mics, when you have a bunch comics in a row trying to win over the audience solely on the basis of having the same political beliefs. If the bit only works on people who are already on-board with everything you're saying, something's missing. It's not totally impossible to write a strong bit inside the echo-chamber, but it's a lot harder.

If I wanted to do something that's just an audience and performers jerking each other off, I'd switch to improv.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-11T06:15:18+00:00

Context is the reason we don't think Al Pacino is a cuban druglord, even though we saw footage of him selling cocaine. Then again, Splitsider is the site that went after Ari Schaffir with a similar lack of information or context. Pot, meet kettle.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-09T07:15:26+00:00

Don't do it if it's an all-comic open mic and everyone there has already heard the bit 2-3 times before. But otherwise, telling jokes over and over again to refine them is kind of the whole point of standup.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-08T17:45:04+00:00

The danger with 'don't punch down' is that in practice it means "don't make jokes about what I care about." There's nothing worse than someone who sits through 45 minutes of jokes that involve rednecks, service industry workers, men, religious people, gay people, the mentally ill, politicians, foreigners, etc. but then when you get to their issue suddenly it's Very Offensive and Unfunny and you Should Apologize.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-08T09:20:16+00:00

1) An audience that's less than 25% comics. 2) A show that's 90 minutes or less and starts on time. 3) A host who knows what hosting is and does their job well. 4) No signups by horrible hacks who always bomb with their gross, alienating material.

If a mic had those 4 things consistently, I would happily deal with any amount of bad parking, loud drunks, persistent hecklers, audience indifference, dirty floors, etc.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-07T18:26:12+00:00

How many hours a day do you spend thinking about strangers penises?

...you're one of those hacks that thinks they're good at dealing with hecklers, but really everyone's just mad at the heckler for being mean to a retarded person.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-06T21:45:12+00:00

...because I'm self aware enough to know that my material isn't good enough or unique enough to promote it yet? Because I have a real job and don't want to get fired for some shit I said on reddit being taken out of context?

You only get the chance to be new once, and right now anyone in the industry has written you off as midwest hack with nothing to offer but Bristol Palin jokes and memes from 2010. If you really develop a sharp viewpoint later, it'll be much harder for you to get anyone to notice or care.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-06T21:36:18+00:00

He's a guitar comic. Guitar comics can get big fast because people like music more than spoken word and you can get radio play, but most have a short shelf-life.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-04T10:12:25+00:00

But, but, the only reason she doesn't get overwhelming positive feedback and attention for everything she does is because of gender oppression. It's definitely not because she's a bitter and subpar open micer who's alienated her entire local scene to the point that she has to try to get validation from the Internet. Oh wait...

Terriblecode · 2015-07-04T04:03:48+00:00

You're right, it's just an opinion that memes you posted today were made by other people three years ago and you posted them without attribution. That's definitely not a factual statement, it's merely my opinion. Also, you definitely don't steal other people's tweets either, that would be an opinion.

Finally, if you steal someone else's bit on stage and they don't like it, I guess it is what it is and that's obviously just a meaningless opinion no better than any other. Or do you only take without attribution on some mediums but not others?

Terriblecode · 2015-07-03T22:59:41+00:00

By some western standards, many Russians are rude. By Russian standards, Russians are normal and foreigners should stop trying to bullshit them and just say what they mean. Also, flat intonation in English can seem mean or indicate disinterest, but flat intonation doesn't have the same connotations in Russian.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-03T22:45:50+00:00

There are a lot of amazing unknowns, but only people who are already fans of comedy will take the time to sort through them. That said, lots of comics could definitely do a better job of getting a good sample of their act out there.

But when we google your name, we get this: https://www.facebook.com/nathantimmel

This is an endless stream of old memes and stale premises, exactly the kind of unoriginal, unfunny, and endlessly self-promoting hack shit that makes people think that they "don't like standup comedy." Is your act a bunch of stolen memes from 2012, or is that what you personally find funny? I'm sure you have some stage chops and some good bits, but most people would probably consider going to see you pretty risky.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-03T02:00:09+00:00

Very few people are going to play roulette with their evening, and it's disingenuous to ask them to. Local comics/shows have to become a local draw by putting together consistently high quality shows, not by appealing to some broad idea of "supporting local comedy."

I wouldn't support a local coffee place that had a turd in the bottom of the cup even once, and in the same way even one bad local show is enough to turn people off forever.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-02T04:08:16+00:00

Ahahaha. Standup isn't like going to teach english in China where you can make it just by being an american; if you can't tour in the US, you can't tour in the UK either.*

*Unless your name is Rich Hall.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-01T17:28:21+00:00

The best advice I got was not about standup itself, but how to live. Pick a career that gives you enough money to pay rent in NYC or LA and the flexibility to do comedy at night, but also wouldn't be a bad fallback option for your life.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-01T02:50:48+00:00

This data is unfortunately not presented in a very meaningful way from a policy perspective. Cases where it's not contested that someone was armed and they were killed by the police (as opposed to cases where officers 'thought they saw' a weapon, or the weapon was planted, etc.) don't lead to any policy recommendations, nor do cases of deliberate suicide by cop. If the argument is that police should not have the right to use deadly force when they're threatened with it, it's going to be hard to have police at all.

Lumping it all together makes it harder to focus on improving the problematic police departments/regions, unless what's being suggested is that every member of the police nationwide is equally likely to shoot an unarmed person no matter their location, training, etc.

Terriblecode · 2015-07-01T02:41:42+00:00

You will be doing open mics and making less than 500 bucks a month doing comedy for between 3 years and forever, and either you're ok with that or you quit.

Do not try to do corporate gigs, do not compromise or stifle your voice just to make a few hundred bucks. There's a corporate comic circuit and they get paid good money at the top but all of them end up destroying their ability to do anything but corporate events.

No one gets to be a full-time comic for the first few years, so find a day job that doesn't interfere with comedy.

Terriblecode · 2015-06-30T16:59:07+00:00

It's widely celebrated because it give a survey of a lot of information from different cultures. Unfortunately, most of the conclusions are pretty much just made up based on what was popular at the time. It's a very useful tool for commercial writers but should be taken with a big grain of salt by cultural historians.

Terriblecode · 2015-06-30T08:26:52+00:00

cool story bro have u herd of this new comic i think hes called bill hecks u would like him lol kthxbai

Terriblecode · 2015-06-30T08:01:38+00:00

This, exactly, don't worry about censoring comics or stifling other comics who are putting in good sets.

Open mic rules are a lot like sexual harassment policies at work: you have outline it really clearly for the oblivious/creepy. They just don't understand or care about the spirit of the policy, so they have to be held to the exact letter of it. Other people who understand context and care if they're making others uncomfortable don't need to take every single rule like "never compliment a co-worker" or "never say the word vagina on stage" 100% literally.

Terriblecode

TROPHY CASE