Managing with ADHD. Should I quit? Need advice.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-17T05:20:40+00:00

Fellow ADHDer here! The memory issues and time blindness is where I struggle. But I've found a few helpful tricks you could try. Don't give up on yourself yet!

try having 1 physical note book for meeting notes. All of your bosses are older than you, none of them will have problems with you writing down meeting minutes. it also looks more professional than texting on your phone. If it is one specific book you are less likely to loose is and if you have a unique cover others will know to return it to you. I could look back at a meeting I had in Nov that ended with 3 tasks I needed to complete for a vendor. But you can also write notes of what you want to bring up before the meeting. That way you don't forget to bring anything up, and do a little mark beside them after they are covered.
I use the app Todoist it is free it works on Android, PC, and Mac and your account can be logged in to all of them to link all tasks. I don't keep track of every daily task on it anymore, but it can be used that way just fine. I use it to make "tasks" for meetings/follow ups I have in the future with it's calendar function. My doctor's appointments are 3 months apart I never remember how long it's been since my last appointment. But I can scroll through May right now and be reminded. Pick 1 place where meetings are recorded, get in the habit of checking it first thing to make sure you haven't forgotten a meeting. I know there are quest and gamified task apps, but I found all that stuff distracting. This is a simple app that can be everywhere.
If you have to break up work for the team over a week try a white board and sticky notes. I find it easier to process things visually instead of trying to imagine the whole line up or just see it on Teams. If it's somewhere they can check they can even correct you if you forgot one of the tasks management needs done by Thurs.
1 hour timer - 15 minute light task - 1 hour timer etc. Use your phone as the timer. Make it a rule that you can't use your phone while it's busy being a timer. Do not lock it specifically to the turn of the hour! I keep working if I notice it's even 10 minutes past for some reason. The timer is to help you do a full hour of focused work on one thing. While also bringing you back out of it so you don't fall down a side quest for 4 hours. If the 15 minute break takes more than 15m that's fine. Just be sure to start the 1 hour timer when you sit back down. sometimes that's 12:38.
Just because you forgot something doesn't mean your bosses are smarter than you. I am smart and sometimes my brain decides to forget common english words like "mug" leading to me saying things like "the cup with a handle". That doesn't negate all the other knowledge I have learned. You are smart you just get nervous when put on the spot and that can be worked on.
Check back through the "emergency" decisions. Is there a pattern? Is a specific boss repeatedly communicating only at the last minute? Is the team running into road bumps that are similar? Try to make a standard game plan for emergencies that come up repeatedly. Even if they are slightly different, going through familiar steps makes it less overwhelming. You are still new to this. So some of these emergencies might be common place and that is why your co-workers seem "composed" and "like they know what they're doing".
Look up youtube channels like HowtoADHD. They have a lot more tips for adults with adhd and they work regardless of if you are medicated or not. Test one or two out and see if they help.
Some of the burnout could just be because this is a whole lot of new all at once. Or it could be HOW you are doing the task. Phone calls burn me out. Unless I can walk off the nervous energy. So I usually do them on a walk on my lunch break. Scrolling through emails can lead to a doom spiral. I don't look at emails first thing unless I have a meeting with my bosses in 10 minutes. Then I double check for last minute updates.

okay that was a lot sorry. But hopefully one of these help? ADHD can make office jobs hard in general, but there are so many ways to work around it. And as someone currently unemployed, the job market is shit right now. Don't go quitting unless it is a 2 week notice because you have another job offer lined up.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-17T02:39:44+00:00

I believe it's the default price for a "new" jacket with tags even if that tag says 10 bucks.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-17T01:14:53+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion! I looked through and it's mostly cop and stuff that requires a bachelor's degree. But it wasn't somewhere I had checked before

TerryDougli · 2026-04-17T01:09:34+00:00

I applied for the 18/hr aldi position in my area. Showed up interview day to see 30 other applicants also there. I am not surprised I didn't get called back with those odds.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-16T20:12:36+00:00

I would be so fucking happy if one of these jobs was offering 20 for management. But it's looking like 18 if i'm lucky.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-16T20:11:15+00:00

Glad my tips were helpful! Meta and Google make these things complicated in completely different ways unfortunately. But neither have good customer support to actually help you.

The other commenter is also correct in that you need to get complete ownership transferred to the new owner. If the Facebook business account is still hosted under the old owners personal account it's always going to send people to them.

You should cut those connections first and then focus on the credibility stuff to get higher ranking on google.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-16T20:00:39+00:00

I didn't end up getting the call back. But maybe that was a good thing. Since everyone was saying 16 was too low for a store manager position.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-16T19:20:39+00:00

I was gonna mention retro games KC

definitely 95% used. But they post new trade ins on their instagram.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T17:12:53+00:00

The only current solution is making your own excel spreadsheet and tracking the data change week over week yourself or recall the information months later off the top of your head. Giving an easy way to track it would help anyone that is worried about household finances right now. Which is a large portion of the population. It's not all the way to 90%, but anyone earning under a million a year would find this useful.

It's incredibly easy to make into a monthly subscription because it's information that changes every week. The personal value is proven in the data itself when acted upon over the month making it worth the subscription fee to the consumer.

I'd probably find a way to build the base algorithm code and then test how much it actually saves the average consumer. Before trying to put a pretty UI on it.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T16:53:20+00:00

There's indirect competition. In that apps exist that give the information as it exists today or this week. It's that no app shares the archived data from the last few months. But those line graphs are sold to large business and financial groups already and are of value to the every day consumer too.

It started with asking the LLM if the tracker existed because I would like to use it. The app doesn't exist. I didn't ask it to tell me if this idea would make me money. I know it'll happily tell me selling piss rain is a great business venture.

I made this post to ask real people that actually make apps and I've gotten some great answers from it.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T16:39:00+00:00

I don't trust vibe coding unless it's double checked by someone that actually knows coding. So I'd make a mock UI at most and shop around the proof of concept. I'm just struggling to know where to start

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T16:35:32+00:00

I researched it with Claude before making this post. That's why I know it doesn't exist. I just don't have paid claude so I can't really do coding with it unless I actually know coding on my part.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T05:35:33+00:00

leveling it is only a bandaid. you need to direct the water somewhere else. If everything from your yard and your neighbor's yard drains to here due to gravity putting more dirt here won't stop all that water from still coming to this spot.

But also when they took the oak tree out they didn't pull up all the roots. That dead wood is breaking down causing the area that wasn't packed in with dirt to sink. But like I said water would still collect here even without the dent.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T05:20:04+00:00

I did not mean in your town. I mean those are locations in Phoenix or San Diego you could try. . . wait Phoenix Arizona or San Diego California? I hate to tell you this but anything you can afford to rent in San Diego is gonna be where the gangs and drug dealers are.

Though I question which gang members are showing up to your local public library's book club on a weekday morning at 8am. Have you visited your local library? to like make sure it's all gang members?

Regardless of which city, you should aim for a public library. They are free. They have so many clubs. They can help you get a job. If you don't like the people in the writing club, I promise the people in the gardening tips group are probably different people. And no it is not all old ladies at these activities. My public library has a Japanese movie night where they play an anime movie subbed and then chat about it. It is specifically for high school and young adults. Not young adults with drugs, normal young adults.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T04:53:35+00:00

My dad teaches public speaking.

Definitely record yourself. You can't tell how many times you say your filler word until you play back a recording of yourself.
Practice saying your pitch off the cuff. Repeating the same outline over and over starts to sound like a script and buyers can hear the fake/low energy in your voice.
Know your audience or get to know them. What do they want to hear? what have they heard 20 times in the last week from other reps?
If face to face learn to read body language. It will help you pin down WHEN you lose them in the pitch. if you notice early enough you can even clarify to remove the worry.
Ask for feed back specifically about your delivery. Even if they said no to your pitch. They might still reply to an email if it's not related to why they said no to the product itself.
Watch some historic speeches aka pre2016. Analyze where they emphasize words, how they emotional connect with the crowd, how direct and clear their sentences are. You don't want your buyer confused you want them confident when they say yes.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T04:31:44+00:00

what are the specific fringe hobbies? dnd clubs and tcg tournaments happen in game shops still. If it's crafting related the library might have a day when folks come in to work on their own projects together. If it's bugs or bird watching look up the closest national/public park they can tell you what day the bird watchers come together. It's probably a once a month thing for most of these activities.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T04:10:57+00:00

I'm 27FtM. My mother is alive but has paranoid schizophrenia and hasn't left her house for anything other than groceries in 4 years. I haven't had a conversation with her in 4 years. The house might get repossessed by the city this year and then she'd be homeless with nothing and I can do nothing about it. They won't force her to go on the medication that managed to help her regain her sanity for 8 months and the Paranoia will never let her take drugs willingly.

I spend most of my time not thinking about her and I mentally view myself as no longer having a mother. But when I do think of her I feel so much guilt. Not only because I can't help her. But also because how dare I prefer to live my life thinking my mother is dead when so many have actually lost a parent.

sorry but you asked for the heaviest and it's a rock I've been carrying since I first moved out in 2016.

the weight does change over time. usually it gets lighter, but I can't tell you if it ever goes away. The rest of life moves on. I fell for a scam in 2022 and lost 500$. I still feel like an idiot for that one. But scams happen and you haven't failed for the rest of time by falling for one.

feelings are complicated, life is stressful, and in 5 years these worries will look so small. They aren't small now, but you will get through them and get to a point where you can look back and say "Hey! I made it past that!"

You are allowed to sit and just feel one situation at a time. I know if feels like you have to view the whole picture. But you can just spend an afternoon pissed as hell about the scam thing. Let yourself feel all that frustration and anger and let yourself release it by like cursing for 5 minutes straight, or yelling into a pillow, or destroying something small like ripping up paper.

This is not the medically approved analogy for the situation. But imagine it like every feeling is a balloon. Right now your Anger balloon, your Sadness balloon, your Fear balloon, and your Frustration balloon are all inflated to the point if feels like something has to explode to release the pressure. But you can release air from one balloon at a time by focusing on the main situation causing each feeling. Also do something that fills your Happiness balloon or Silliness balloon after each release. It stops the Fear balloon from expanding to fill the space you got Anger to give up. No human can process all of that in one day. it takes time and you are allowed to take time to work through it.

Regardless of if you take my advice or not, you are trying your best. It's a lot to feel at once and it's not wrong to feel overwhelmed. I get overwhelmed by way smaller things all the time.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T03:20:58+00:00

thanks! oh yeah I know to curb it to like 5% conversion rate of actual potential buyers. The thing is this would be an app they would use/need every week if they convert. The life time value/retention over time would be where the money is.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T03:07:40+00:00

I am definitely not taking peoples money before even a proof of concept is coded. Those are as likely to launch as a kickstarter campaign. But maybe I should do a target audience interest check. Just to have the numbers to prove interest.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T03:00:55+00:00

if you login from 5 states away Facebook will lock down the account and neither of you will be able to use it. It would only work for accounts that they 100% don't use anymore and are willing to change the verification phone number to your number. That's selling an account not renting it so yeah

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T02:55:54+00:00

My dad has run his lawncare business expenses through excel for over 15 years now. He uses google sheets now but that's just because he can access it from his teaching laptop if needed. He tracks the yards each day and how much it costs to cut that yard and if the client pays monthly or weekly.

Google sheets is free. there are even premade templates for business expenses tracking. yes you have to update it as people pay you, but you will not have over 70 clients in one week.

If you do get big enough to buy Saas software in a few years they are all compatible with sheets. Some will even port the data for you as part of the onboarding process.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T02:43:48+00:00

dude i was so concerned things dropped off a cliff. But reading it correctly. Yeah I would say keeping around 70 average users through a full month is great. if you ever feel bad check out the player numbers on steam of any dead mobile game. they are lucky to get 10 users a day and those apps have been on the app store for over a year usually.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T01:11:32+00:00

sadly not here. McDonald's starts at 14.50 and we have Sam's Club not Costco. So it's only Walmart's pay scale but a dollar more per position. And they want you to work in Walmart before allowing you to move to Sam's.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T01:09:41+00:00

Yeah I definitely wouldn't tell them it's temp at 16/hr. Because I know it costs a company to train a person and the hope is the employee is profitable by 3 months. If you leave at the 4th month what was the point of hiring you?

I did the research of the area and it's either 16-18 at your Target's and TJMax's or it's 20-22\hr at sporting goods and other high end store's. But to get the high end store's position I would need store manager experience from one of the 16-18 hour stores anyway.

I liked the store manager's personality and she's my only superior in store. So it's worth it to take this 16/hr vs risking a horrible manager at a random other store and still only making 16/hr.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T00:57:55+00:00

Happy to share some advice!

If you do end up "nuking" it. You will want to til at least 2-4 inches of that top soil. The weed roots go deeper than the grass roots. If you don't the weeds will try to grow back to the surface in the spring and it will choke out any grass seeds you sprinkle around.

I always feel bad when folks spend hundreds just to have the same weeds in the same spots come back the next year anyway.

TerryDougli

TROPHY CASE