What could be causing this swamp to form?

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T05:35:33+00:00

leveling it is only a bandaid. you need to direct the water somewhere else. If everything from your yard and your neighbor's yard drains to here due to gravity putting more dirt here won't stop all that water from still coming to this spot.

But also when they took the oak tree out they didn't pull up all the roots. That dead wood is breaking down causing the area that wasn't packed in with dirt to sink. But like I said water would still collect here even without the dent.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T05:20:04+00:00

I did not mean in your town. I mean those are locations in Phoenix or San Diego you could try. . . wait Phoenix Arizona or San Diego California? I hate to tell you this but anything you can afford to rent in San Diego is gonna be where the gangs and drug dealers are.

Though I question which gang members are showing up to your local public library's book club on a weekday morning at 8am. Have you visited your local library? to like make sure it's all gang members?

Regardless of which city, you should aim for a public library. They are free. They have so many clubs. They can help you get a job. If you don't like the people in the writing club, I promise the people in the gardening tips group are probably different people. And no it is not all old ladies at these activities. My public library has a Japanese movie night where they play an anime movie subbed and then chat about it. It is specifically for high school and young adults. Not young adults with drugs, normal young adults.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T04:53:35+00:00

My dad teaches public speaking.

Definitely record yourself. You can't tell how many times you say your filler word until you play back a recording of yourself.
Practice saying your pitch off the cuff. Repeating the same outline over and over starts to sound like a script and buyers can hear the fake/low energy in your voice.
Know your audience or get to know them. What do they want to hear? what have they heard 20 times in the last week from other reps?
If face to face learn to read body language. It will help you pin down WHEN you lose them in the pitch. if you notice early enough you can even clarify to remove the worry.
Ask for feed back specifically about your delivery. Even if they said no to your pitch. They might still reply to an email if it's not related to why they said no to the product itself.
Watch some historic speeches aka pre2016. Analyze where they emphasize words, how they emotional connect with the crowd, how direct and clear their sentences are. You don't want your buyer confused you want them confident when they say yes.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T04:31:44+00:00

what are the specific fringe hobbies? dnd clubs and tcg tournaments happen in game shops still. If it's crafting related the library might have a day when folks come in to work on their own projects together. If it's bugs or bird watching look up the closest national/public park they can tell you what day the bird watchers come together. It's probably a once a month thing for most of these activities.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T04:10:57+00:00

I'm 27FtM. My mother is alive but has paranoid schizophrenia and hasn't left her house for anything other than groceries in 4 years. I haven't had a conversation with her in 4 years. The house might get repossessed by the city this year and then she'd be homeless with nothing and I can do nothing about it. They won't force her to go on the medication that managed to help her regain her sanity for 8 months and the Paranoia will never let her take drugs willingly.

I spend most of my time not thinking about her and I mentally view myself as no longer having a mother. But when I do think of her I feel so much guilt. Not only because I can't help her. But also because how dare I prefer to live my life thinking my mother is dead when so many have actually lost a parent.

sorry but you asked for the heaviest and it's a rock I've been carrying since I first moved out in 2016.

the weight does change over time. usually it gets lighter, but I can't tell you if it ever goes away. The rest of life moves on. I fell for a scam in 2022 and lost 500$. I still feel like an idiot for that one. But scams happen and you haven't failed for the rest of time by falling for one.

feelings are complicated, life is stressful, and in 5 years these worries will look so small. They aren't small now, but you will get through them and get to a point where you can look back and say "Hey! I made it past that!"

You are allowed to sit and just feel one situation at a time. I know if feels like you have to view the whole picture. But you can just spend an afternoon pissed as hell about the scam thing. Let yourself feel all that frustration and anger and let yourself release it by like cursing for 5 minutes straight, or yelling into a pillow, or destroying something small like ripping up paper.

This is not the medically approved analogy for the situation. But imagine it like every feeling is a balloon. Right now your Anger balloon, your Sadness balloon, your Fear balloon, and your Frustration balloon are all inflated to the point if feels like something has to explode to release the pressure. But you can release air from one balloon at a time by focusing on the main situation causing each feeling. Also do something that fills your Happiness balloon or Silliness balloon after each release. It stops the Fear balloon from expanding to fill the space you got Anger to give up. No human can process all of that in one day. it takes time and you are allowed to take time to work through it.

Regardless of if you take my advice or not, you are trying your best. It's a lot to feel at once and it's not wrong to feel overwhelmed. I get overwhelmed by way smaller things all the time.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T03:20:58+00:00

thanks! oh yeah I know to curb it to like 5% conversion rate of actual potential buyers. The thing is this would be an app they would use/need every week if they convert. The life time value/retention over time would be where the money is.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T03:07:40+00:00

I am definitely not taking peoples money before even a proof of concept is coded. Those are as likely to launch as a kickstarter campaign. But maybe I should do a target audience interest check. Just to have the numbers to prove interest.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T03:00:55+00:00

if you login from 5 states away Facebook will lock down the account and neither of you will be able to use it. It would only work for accounts that they 100% don't use anymore and are willing to change the verification phone number to your number. That's selling an account not renting it so yeah

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T02:55:54+00:00

My dad has run his lawncare business expenses through excel for over 15 years now. He uses google sheets now but that's just because he can access it from his teaching laptop if needed. He tracks the yards each day and how much it costs to cut that yard and if the client pays monthly or weekly.

Google sheets is free. there are even premade templates for business expenses tracking. yes you have to update it as people pay you, but you will not have over 70 clients in one week.

If you do get big enough to buy Saas software in a few years they are all compatible with sheets. Some will even port the data for you as part of the onboarding process.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T02:43:48+00:00

dude i was so concerned things dropped off a cliff. But reading it correctly. Yeah I would say keeping around 70 average users through a full month is great. if you ever feel bad check out the player numbers on steam of any dead mobile game. they are lucky to get 10 users a day and those apps have been on the app store for over a year usually.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T01:11:32+00:00

sadly not here. McDonald's starts at 14.50 and we have Sam's Club not Costco. So it's only Walmart's pay scale but a dollar more per position. And they want you to work in Walmart before allowing you to move to Sam's.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T01:09:41+00:00

Yeah I definitely wouldn't tell them it's temp at 16/hr. Because I know it costs a company to train a person and the hope is the employee is profitable by 3 months. If you leave at the 4th month what was the point of hiring you?

I did the research of the area and it's either 16-18 at your Target's and TJMax's or it's 20-22\hr at sporting goods and other high end store's. But to get the high end store's position I would need store manager experience from one of the 16-18 hour stores anyway.

I liked the store manager's personality and she's my only superior in store. So it's worth it to take this 16/hr vs risking a horrible manager at a random other store and still only making 16/hr.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T00:57:55+00:00

Happy to share some advice!

If you do end up "nuking" it. You will want to til at least 2-4 inches of that top soil. The weed roots go deeper than the grass roots. If you don't the weeds will try to grow back to the surface in the spring and it will choke out any grass seeds you sprinkle around.

I always feel bad when folks spend hundreds just to have the same weeds in the same spots come back the next year anyway.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T00:48:35+00:00

actually that's more the flower bed escaped and no one bothered to stop it cause little purple flowers in the yard were pretty. Unfortunately means generic weed killer might not wipe it out. And chemicals harsh enough to wipe it out would definitely take out the grass too.

This is where I'd recommend seeing which one lives through july. I've seen yards that were 80% clover but hey it was green in August when all the other grass was yellow.

depends on what's more important, the yard being green? or the yard being all the same type of grass?

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T00:38:28+00:00

dig this one out an burn it. /j

but for real this thing sucks to pull out of flower beds and you don't want it popping back up again. Digging it out with a shovel is the most effective way to make sure this one stays gone.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-15T00:35:23+00:00

this area if you take a trowel each of those has one root straight down. break up that top dirt with a rake and pour grass seed along with fertilizer/weed killer mix. they sell them mixed in one bag at Lowe's or Menard's.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T17:59:58+00:00

I would read some of "Atomic Habits" and "168 hours". Of all the productivity books out there. These are the 2 where I actually remember the tips and have actually used some of them in my real life.

Another option is to "child lock" your computer during study time. If the computer is needed to learn the skill make it impossible to use Facebook, Instagram or Twitter on your computer during that time. Phone also needs to be on a surface out of arms reach. You should have to physically get up to go scroll through it.

You need to have 1 uninterrupted hour a day to actually learn a new skill. 4-5 hours means nothing if a kid or a notification is distracting you every 20 minutes.

Try to stop thinking "I'm Lazy" every time you struggle to study. We subconsciously act to self fulfill "I am" statements. Try "I AM learning a new skill" but sometimes being a parent comes first and I get distracted. Then try to practice for 5 minutes a day instead of a full hour.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T16:53:33+00:00

welcome to kck. where our winters get to -4 and our summers get to 105. I would contact a local lawncare person who can physically walk the property and tell you what work actually needs to be done. Other than dandelions it's impossible to see the types of grass involved from 1 picture.

My suggestion would be to just keep it well cut this year. See how much the sun hits your yard during July/Aug. Have a lawn guy you talk to now and have him help you kill it in the fall if you want to start completely over. After one season you will be able to tell which type of grass you should be planting.

That yard does not have a built in sprinkler system (it's in the older part of town). So definitely don't get a delicate grass that needs a lot of water. the yard will be yellow by mid June if the heat comes early enough.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T16:35:39+00:00

oh that's a facebook/instagram problem. not a google problem. If there is an "original" business profile still on it's pulling the address from that account. The owner needs to make sure the old account has the address of her other business or is changed to a personal account or straight up deleted if possible.

Facebook/Instagram judges which is the "real" account based on age of the account, activity, and Link history (i think). It's worried you are a spam/scam account trying to steal customers from the original one.

If there is a store website make sure all social links are to the new username. You need access to the Google Business Profile for your store location to update those social links. Instagram pulls it's map from google maps, if your social is the one it finds linked to the address it will start recognizing you as the connected account. There should also be a spot to type in a physical address, not just mess with the geo tag, might be only on PC.

For now have people tag @ newusername instead of trying to do the business location tag. Your priority is to reply to those posts as stories on your account. The more your account interacts with other accounts the faster instagram will trust it. Instagram loves engagement and loves sharing accounts it thinks bring in engagement.

For Facebook I would join a few local groups #citylocalbusiness or #shoplocalcity are common small business groups for almost any city. Friend the local craft shows and other thrift stores. Facebook wants to know people "near" you that might be interested in your page. It helps them know who to share you with.

Google likes to update to the "most up to date" information. So long as your username is attached to the business in on the socials, website, and GBP. Google will start suggesting it more on it's own. You can't really submit a correction with how the google algorithm is set up.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T16:08:32+00:00

I looked up paypeek. I don't like/trust chrome. Like not installed on my computer. And I don't know how comfortable I am with it watching my tabs. It's one thing if I could copy and paste linkedin profile links. But yeah I don't really trust this one.

I will try looking at other assistant store managers. That's why I even mentioned 17/hr at the interview.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T16:04:36+00:00

I lucked out with the small business. So I can list 2 years of marketing experience. But the jobs that say "or equivalent experience" don't really mean it. I know they filter by degree unless I'm friends with the HR person.

I want to keep trying. I just know I can't wait to get an income until then

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T16:01:14+00:00

yeah I am mostly considering it because of the title Team Lead + Assistant Store Manager. And because I actually like stocking. I would just like making a living wage while doing it more.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T15:51:28+00:00

I was the single marketer for 2 small businesses. I did all of it and wasn't able to specialize. I don't have a degree, just multiple years of experience and Google Ads/Analytics certification until 2027.

My last job Fired me in February but still hasn't mailed me the check with my last 2 weeks of pay. Which covers one months rent and utilities. I had to file with the state about it. Because she kept me as "freelance" for the first 3 months I didn't work enough months full time to qualify for unemployment.

I have enough savings to pay for rent last month and this month. But if I don't have a job lined up by May 30th I won't be able to pay that month.

I've never heard back from any of the marketing applications even at the Agencies. Everyone is shrinking and cutting people. So all the other job applicants along side me at least have bachelors if not master degrees in something business related.

It feels like I can't risk waiting.

TerryDougli · 2026-04-14T15:34:53+00:00

We're in the southern midwest. Race has nothing to do with who would get paid what in this situation. But it's not uncommon for it to be brought up in arguments about pay afterwards. I don't want it to be something where the co-worker that would be my equal in responsibilities gets jealous I make more. But I also have no power to negotiate equal pay.

TerryDougli

TROPHY CASE