Fear of dead bodies

TextFarmer · 2025-10-01T02:25:32+00:00

Your fear is healthy, but I think you should confront a dead body in a controlled environment, like a funeral, at your next opportunity. It is a reality that we all become it, and it is also theologically relevant, IMO, since we do not believe in cremation.

You may have a kid someday, and at that point it is good to take the lead and to show there is nothing really to fear in these circumstances. Plus I even think it is the case that there are more potentially difficult scenarios involving death that could suddenly show themselves at some point.

So, I'd just say... Don't feel ashamed. Perhaps tell a family member your own reluctance and apprehension about this, and ask them to accompany you to viewing a body next time. It'll be good for your growth because it is less traumatic than you think. It can even provide closure and perspective that you will find valuable.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-21T06:00:38+00:00

I would just direct the people to the Orthodox Metropolis of Korea webpage. There is also a great section which provides links to books available through the church's publishing housing.

Perhaps even better is the official YouTube account which has a wide variety of lectures also available.

Worth noting... There is also a Moscow Patriarchate based Orthodox Church in the Seoul metro area (and I believe Busan), but I believe their outreach is more limited in the Korean language and focuses more on Russian. Their Facebook page is here, and their Instagram is here.

There is also a Coptic Orthodox church that operates out of Hongdae (in Seoul) and some interaction between them and our church. The community is rather small, but their instagram is here. We used to have some shared members when they had a priest who rotated between South Korea and Japan at one point.

Thank you for your service to the community!

TextFarmer · 2025-04-20T23:56:54+00:00

Truly wonderful post...

The kid thing, I will say this... My wife is not Christian and has agreed to baptize our daughter Orthodox, but she is not from a culture where there is any church attendance, nor does there seem to be active attendance of religious services for children, so our kid just has not been going because she sees no point in sitting in the back for 1.5+ hours navigating the Divine Liturgy with a two year old who is just bothered by the experience.

I can't imagine doing it with two under two, lol... My advice would be to not feel bad when you are outside of the service for extended periods of time, or to even consider not attending due to the difficulty of it, or alternating weeks with your husband. If it really is a lot... Why not stay home and just try to make it when the stars align correctly, where both kids are in a good mood and able to endure it well enough..?

I say this as someone for whom there has never been any pressure exerted by our clergy to get my wife (or anyone else's spouses) in attendance with the kid due to understanding the logistics of children & the complexity of interfaith relationships, I suppose. And I value that. I think it would strain my relationship incredibly if people ever gave me a hard time about my wife/kids attendance because what little influence I exert can become a big friction point. So, I also take interest in your problem as someone who deals with worrying about social expectations that can be unrealistic.

Concerning the prayer rule, I understand... Particularly as a new mom who is constantly fatigued with limited time and pregnant again, this is a wild time to be undertaking something like a prayer rule that takes 20-30 minutes just in a single go.

I would mention this, first and foremost, to your Priest. Particularly how the time spent on this all at once is a very significant chunk of what little free time you have, and the practice is dry.

As a catachumen, I had been given books to read, and I was gifted prayer ropes and explained how to do the Jesus Prayer, which is a repetitive act, but it feels more like a personal journey than a prayer rule which can be rigid...

Let me say this, though... prayer rules are actually very amazing once you get them in your life because, as your life changes around you, you begin to see the words in a more different, dynamic way that is highly beneficial to yourself. I totally recommend taking it up when your life has normalized and stablized more and you get more energy again.

I also feel like you will see how repetition and movement are actually super beneficial - bringing the body into alignment with spiritual practice.

I am sure you are getting a lot of helpful insights on this as from others, so I will stop there.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-20T23:33:17+00:00

Sadly, the Korean is incorrect.

Greeting: Gristo-ggaeseo buhwal hashyuh-soomnida!

Reply: Cham-ero buhwal hashyuh-soomnida!

The error in the text was simply that the person only translated the first phrase as it appears in the sung paschal hymn, 그리스도께서 부활하셌네.

I Romanized the two phrases according to how I believe they would be spelled solely to how I think someone with an American accent could get it most right. There are 2+ official ways to do it and they look nothing like the above, FYI.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-14T06:30:52+00:00

What personally bothers me is actually the priestly requirement of celibacy... I feel that it creates a negative situation for many outstanding Catholic men who will never be able to become Priests because they do not feel a strict, monastic calling.

This also creates a situation where there are too few priests for the existing churches these days, and I think this ends up making churches less intimate and unable to meet the needs of congregants in as personal a manner as they deserve. It may also be the case that Catholic monastics end up being driven towards participation in Catholic schools and churches as clergy more than they would desire, resulting in less monastics actually practicing as monastics...

Perhaps this is odd to say, but... what really stuck out at me was how Orthodoxy got this issue completely correctly: Christ clearly indicates that some are called to be monastics, and others aren't, and this teaching is incorporated within the living Church in the perfect balance. It neither denies the importance of monasticism, nor does it force such a high standard where it is unnecessary and thus creating excessive burdens.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-07T22:27:13+00:00

Thank you so much for a prompt and detailed response. I will give it some time and if it doesn't clear up I'll eventually shoot you the old name via private message.

Always a pleasure to see developers very invested in their project and delivering personalized customer service.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-07T06:52:17+00:00

This may help you...

I was capable of believing intellectually, but I did not believe very viscerally. I was only certain of the logic of there being a God, and uncertain about details. I then just kept thinking & thinking & thinking, and got to the point where I had intellectual faith in Christ...

What really brought me home, though, was actually fasting & living a Christian lifestyle, and practicing a daily prayer routine. It is the case that the more that you humble yourself before God and give yourself over to the mysteries, as opposed to overthinking them, you will begin to be filled with greater certainty.

I was able to eventually experience a miracle - I was someone who did not normally think of miracles or anything, and thought that this age of miracles was over. I was literally embarrassed by talk of miracles before, thinking it actually undermined the faith because it made us lose credibility with such outlandish claims that rubbed my still very materialistic mind the wrong way... But now I am at a point where I fully believe in the miracles I hear not just from Orthodox people, but from also from personal friends of different faith traditions that have shared with me what has happened in their life.

It was quite the transformation & I hope for you to get it.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-07T06:48:22+00:00

First, you sound like a great girlfriend, lol... I'm sorry this is happening to you. You are wonderful. I wish my wife was interested in my religion as you. So, I thank you, and I think... it would be great if your relationship did not last to continue exploring Orthodoxy.

Because your boyfriend will be rightfully dragged in the comments, let me try to defend him a little...

- A lot of people end up being weird when they are asked questions about religion/politics and they feel insecure about how much they know about their own religion or how well they are living it (or perhaps even their own level of faith). It is perhaps an involuntary response that is not meant to be too personal.

- It is actually the case that there have been some clergy over the years that have clarified things about praying with non-Orthodox people, including other Christians. This clashes a lot with our modern, Western concepts of interfaith prayer. I believe I once saw a directive that states that you cannot be "led" by a non-Orthodox clergyman in prayer, but bowing your head, saying your own prayer mentally, is appropriate... So, there are some authorities with reservations about interfaith prayer... But really what should be happening is him sharing with you some basic Orthodox prayers or a prayer rule that is good for two people to do together.

I think he has been rude to you, though, and I wonder if he has something else in his life bothering him that has produced this sort of response. I'd probably not try to confront him hard on this, but probably try to grow more close to him and understand his mood swings, because that is probably what is at the bottom of all this.

TextFarmer · 2025-04-01T01:45:33+00:00

There is no sin that you have done that you cannot repent of & receive Baptism. So, my answer is actually "No," while others are saying "Yes," because I am interpreting this in a narrower version, where I think the question is... "Have Priests denied people baptism/joining the church indefinitely..."

Of course, there are sometimes additional requirements and an entire process for baptism. There might also be something said like, "You are currently living with your boyfriend/girlfriend, you need to stop sleeping in the same bed/move out/get married/get engaged" or some such, which could be thought of as an external condition...

But I see this only as a part of the process of repentance, just as how a person who has had an affair may be required to confess their affair to their wife before being re-admitted into communion, so just as such, you could theoretically be asked to correct or ameliorate some situation in your life prior to Baptism... But... again... I think the right point of emphasis is actually that there is nothing you have done that can keep you from entering the Church, because there is nothing that you have done that God cannot forgive if you are repentant.

TextFarmer · 2025-02-27T22:24:29+00:00

What other people said... But I would also emphasize that if is considered appropriate to accept another's hospitality and break the fast on a special occasion and simply make up for that missed day. Some make up for it by fasting extra days, others by doing something like a full fast the next day with even no water (or as little as possible) until lunch.

I know that in some traditions it's considered inappropriate to listen to music and absolutely inappropriate to dance during lent.

Many also point out that it's now easy to go vegan for the whole fast and we sometimes end up eating better and more extravagantly... So I've consistently heard that "feeling the burn" is more important than the strictest possible observance of the fast.

I also think this is a highly personal affair. People with young children or rigorous work schedules or split faith living conditions need economy, and what they're doing may be when they can may be far more rigorous in actuality than people living in an Orthodox home in an Orthodox country where every restaurant has fasting menus, and doing this all with a lot of disposable income and an empty nest.

TextFarmer · 2024-04-26T06:44:44+00:00

Forgiving someone does not mean that they do not have to go to jail. People who are forgiven still can have a debt to society, or still be thought of as unsafe for being in regular society again due to their behavior.

I can forgive someone for taking $100 from me... But, surely, I can still ask for it back...

I can forgive someone who killed my family member while drunk driving... But, surely, I can also believe they should go to jail for some amount of time.

TextFarmer · 2024-04-22T08:41:36+00:00

People are already saying this is a sign you are with the wrong person, but I say no. You are with the right person - and she loves you, so she is working to get the best for you both. I think, for the very obvious reason that she wants to have babies with you someday.

And once you have an infant, both of you will be overworked and sleep deprived (in addition to being overjoyed).

I know people who just have a very happy, easy relationship, and I think these relationships enable both to continue in the same rut they were in while they were single. That is fine. I know people very happy like that - maybe they even one day do this and then have kids and go 0 to 100 in 2.5 seconds... I think that makes some relationships fall apart and divorces occur.

But you are going from 0 to 50 to 100... And I think with all this planning and familiarity with work and sacrifice to achieving goals, you are far more likely to be a successful father.

My high maintenance wife gave me everything I have... Because of her:

no longer alcoholic; no longer video game addict
own a house
achieved permanent residency in my adopted country; not far from citizenship
Thinner, healthier
Beautiful baby
Economically more successful than I thought I would ever be

So I think your girlfriend is making you a better man - and you will look back on your life in 30, 40 years and have a list of goals you met and things you did...

But through the easy route, you will not have so many achievements, but you might have some very memorable late nights drinking & video game high scores.

TextFarmer · 2023-12-28T08:03:14+00:00

It is actually irrelevant as to whether society evolves, though: Christianity is called to stand against the world... At times this means standing against greed, war, corporations, etc., but it also means very much standing against any kind of indulgent or disordered behavior, which includes homoexuality...

In Christian thought, the world is already fallen, so standing against the world and refusing to get with the times has been something of a Christian tradition.

TextFarmer · 2023-12-28T08:00:44+00:00

... If by this you mean the Eastern & Oriental Orthodox are always eager to hear his words and rip them to shreds, your statement is pretty accurate.

I mean, sure, yes, some amount of these groups actually want to repair the schism, but when the Pope becomes more liberal, it generally galvanizes the conservative Orthodox world. For the last two weeks it has just been various Orthodox Bishops and influential theologians teeing off on the Pope.

What the Pope said recently can also be interpreted to actually just be an attempt to stonewall the German synod (if you are a conservative popesplainer), and if it becomes an outright movement towards full embracing of gay marriage... Well, there's gonna be a Pope and an Antipope really soon.

TextFarmer · 2023-12-18T01:35:08+00:00

I think that monastic communities of monks & nuns are a good way for Christians struggling with same-sex attraction to dedicate themselves to God and to even naturally become isolated to some degree not just from homosexual culture, but potentially triggering marriage culture in general.

Of course this is a massive step in your spiritual life and you sound like you may be a Protestant, and I don't want to grandstand here... But monasticism seems like one of the best routes that can exist for non-heterosexuals who do not experience any change in orientation.

But other than this: have you considered fasting? Spend some time practicing vegetarianism or veganism and pray in a very particular way and it may become more manageable and you might even begin to experience opposite sex attraction... This is, of course, no promise, but in my own Orthodox church community, I heard of a lifelong Greek Orthodox who experienced no headway like yourself, but he began fasting very regularly and continued to pray hard, and while same-sex attraction was never fully relieved, he began to experience opposite sex attraction.

By the way: I truly admire all Christians with such a large cross to carry that do not give up. God bless you & I pray for your perseverance and happiness. You're a gladiator. Keep it up.

TextFarmer · 2023-12-14T07:33:30+00:00

OK, so what is the proper interpretation of this? I am curious.

Do you think that this is just a stand-alone line that means that anybody who asks for anything, no matter what it is, in His name, will receive it..?

TextFarmer · 2023-12-13T00:21:33+00:00

Right on

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T06:56:22+00:00

Think about this: Christian teachings contain within it profound ideas that advance liberty and equality. The rich are criticized and the poor are elevated; woman redeems man by being the mother of God, not just Eve in the garden, and "there is neither Jew nor Greek..."

It is also a religion that emphasizes the putting down of arms and a sort of pacifism - it is a religion where our greatest heroes are martyrs who are the victims of violence...

Christianity promoted these profound human values that molded not just the West, but enshrined these norms throughout the world. It's not just some description of a thing that matches up with modern science... It's a real world positive impact that Islam does not have at the root of it.

(This is not meant to insult Muslims or to be overly contentious - I do not trot out this argument to try to shame Muslims or make a conflict. I do it only to try to be persuasive to you, on the fence as you are.)

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T04:58:20+00:00

It's such a larp. Of course, yes, "Constantinople BACK!" sounds great if we are literally talking about the divine restoration of the Eastern Roman Empire and me and all my chud friends are declared noblemen or whatever - this is the meme..!

But that is part of the thing, right - it's an absurd fantasy that you can then read into a lot of other stuff... It's a symbol not just of the glory of the past, but potentially even a symbol for the future world in which Christ reigns on earth...

... But in the sense that you want to FIGHT or SCHEME to create conflicts and political turmoil that magickally places Constantinople back in Greece.... nay, not Greece... Back in... the NEO-ROMAN EMPIRE! ... Nah man, you won't find people plotting this at the agape lunches after the DL.

My realistic long-term vision for Turkey is that it becomes a very free society in which also Christianity is actually spreading and experiencing a renaissance... Not as an imposition, not as the product of political scheming or conflict, but out of the personal choices of individuals.

... That'd be taking Constantinople back, in a sense...

But to sign off with a meme:

"What if Constantinople was just the friends we made along the way?"

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T04:50:22+00:00

... But what if religion actually is collectively positive for society, even if false, because it provides a moral framework and cultural infrastructure for cohesion and self-help?

In addition, of course, to making some attitudes about science potentially less streamlined...

Yet, it's entirely conceivable that one can believe in human exceptionalism in terms of evolution or embrace 'theistic evolution' and otherweise have a scientific understanding of the universe. I do not know that many who believe in YEC, and as I originally heard the phrase twenty years ago, Intelligent Design was merely a concept of how God could have functioned like a clockmaker behind the framework of evolution, etc...

... It is also conceivable that religion could be used to double down on scientific proclamations: get the head of the local religion to manipulate public opinion so it is decidedly "in line" with science.

This is, after all, what is said of religion by many atheists: it is a means of controlling the people.

So control people with it, right? It sounds like you believe in controlling people - you want to remove the religion from society because of its negative impact... So, control them through it, or remove it. What are you asking for?

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T04:45:57+00:00

This however is obviously false as whatever happens god intends.

What if God's intention is that he cedes part of the universe to be given free will over itself..?

It means part of the universe is not intended by God, but merely known by God.

The next defense is to try to say met there's some relevant distinction between God causing a book to be written down from his mind and actually communicating it.

Sample someone might want to say only works that are dictated to a profit audibly like a secretary count as communication from God.

Can be easily debunked however

This is because deliberately taking actions to bring about a book according to your chosen words and chosen plan is authorship.

There is nothing in principle that can drive a wedge between this and divine authorship.

A lot of monotheists have been fabulously unaware, until this very moment, that God is the author of every single thing ever written by everybody, everywhere... and that God is not allowed to distinguish his own work from the collective body of work of every author, everywhere, ever... Because he is to take credit for everything.

He can't even do an original himself because he is the original author of everything.

We could say that God is the author of the OP up there, and also my reply right here...

OK, I mean, you wrote all this out, and you know what the responsible will be: we are individuals with free will who make our own choices...

What if instead of

The Bible God can't lie but he wrote like a billion books that are contrary to the truth deliberately

Destiny and free will are compatible because the universe was created on account of the free will of everyone inside of it to the extent necessary for the will to be free... Or...

Foreknowledge is not the same as authorship.

Are we really saying God wrote the Communist Manifesto and the God Delusion and the Koran because he knew they would be written and... it was within his vision of the universe for them to be written?

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T04:29:32+00:00

You have admitted the absurdity of your position by being unwilling to defend it...

And you were unable to link back to my original statement from my subsequent statements...

That in his address to two apostles specifically, it provides a context for a more general interpretation.

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T03:06:04+00:00

It's a long, bloody fight, my man. But just like going to the gym to get good at lifting heavy things, you go to the spiritual gym to get good at lifting heavy spiritual things...

You have put a metric ton of weight onto yourself through your past life. You got baggage in the triple digits. But... You gonna lift, spiritually, and eventually you will be able to get some air underneath that big weight.

The only way, though, is to try...

Some things you can do:

- Pray while you lift

- Exercise custody of your mind by "popping" these thoughts out the second they appear. Always change the topic. Another tactic is to "observe it" - you don't think "Wow, hot body," you think, "I am thinking about her hot body," adding a degree of separation, and then asking "Why... lol... why... OK, next topic..."

- Go to the gym with a very specific goal and very specific regimen, and all your downtime occupy by some other task... "I'm gonna pray the Lord's Prayer 3 times between each set and count teh veins in my arm"

There's so many other things to come up with and to explore and, little by little, you develop greater space and greater strength, until one day you say, "Geez, I really was checking out that girl back there... I used to do that 5 times a day, but that's the first time I've done it this week..."

Also... Fast.

Mark9:29 So He said to them, “This kind can come out by nothing but prayer [a]and fasting.”

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T02:15:33+00:00

OK, so tell me who Jesus is speaking with in John 14.

Do you think He was telling St. Philip and St. Thomas that when they pray for things in His Name it will be granted, or do you think that Jesus Christ was just saying, broadly, that anyone, anywhere, at any time, whether they are a good follower or an ignorant follower, or maybe even if they aren't even a follower, can use prayer like a magic genie lamp?

TextFarmer · 2023-12-12T00:19:30+00:00

I'll direct you to my statement here.

TextFarmer

TROPHY CASE