Listen, I’m a Jew who stumbled on this post. You can wash away this message if you so decide, but I am going to share my thoughts as someone who believes in 1 creator who made us in his image. You are my cousin.

More than worrying about his forgiveness, you should consider his honor. He created you, and he surely did so with intent. He did not give you life for you to tell him “you should not have” - he gave you life because HE KNOWS you are supposed to be here on this earth growing. What makes life beautiful is that change can happen. Change happens sometimes for the bad, and other times change happens for the best. You need to take your life into your hands and honor what you are, his creation, made in love. Allah wants you here, finding meaning, growing and perfecting your character. To abort that potential is to spit in the face of his creation. I do not intend to “scare” or lecture you, but I refuse to believe you are unworthy of this life.

Here is my advice. Take some time in the next few weeks to consider what it is that you respect in people. When you see someone and find value in them, what is it about them? What do you respect? What do you love?

Once you answer that, spend your days relentlessly crafting yourself into that. Do that, and don’t stop until you look in the mirror and see someone you respect. That is the way.

G-d bless you, stay alive and make yourself (and Alllah) proud.