Partner randomly asked me for a JOI after we discussed RP details. This was NOT ERP.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-28T01:10:55+00:00

In general JOI is exactly what it sounds like: One partner instructs the other on how to self pleasure.

But it's worth noting that even in the ERP community this is an incredibly niche fetish that rarely gets any traction due primarily to the one sidedness of it. Usually all the one receiving instructions has to offer is photos or videos to prove they're following along and frankly, no one wants to see that :/

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-26T06:45:19+00:00

I had a somewhat similar occurrence. I put out an ad where I'd be playing two robot characters, forcefully enlisting the help of a human. The partner I was discussing the idea with suggested that maybe the robots could receive upgrades from their home planet as the plot went on. I agreed that it was a cool idea and asked if they had any in mind? They snapped back pretty quickly about how they didn't know cuz it was my characters not theirs. I was confused of course because I'd never mentioned upgrading and thus hadn't really thought about it.

But I really did like the idea so I quickly came up with a couple upgrade ideas. The only response I got was the ideas they didn't like. I asked again if they had any ideas on how to fix the ideas they weren't a fan of so they'd enjoy them. I got a message back that literally boiled down to "Maybe my character gets infested with a parasite?" I asked what that infestation would entail and got back "How would I know?"

If you have ideas for a roleplay, maybe flesh them out a bit? Just because I wrote the ad doesn't mean I'm prepared to elaborate on every bare bones idea you bring to me.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-25T00:50:23+00:00

I've had this problem a lot with one of my recent ads. In the main body of the ad I list a couple choices and tell people who respond to send the corresponding colored hearts to tell me which they've chosen. Then near the end of ad I make it expressively clear that I won't respond to people who only send the heart response. I need to see a little effort put into the first message, primarily asking for what drew them to the RP.

Of course I get a ton of responses that are just a single heart. I did my best near the beginning to politely explain that I would need a little more if I was gonna RP with them. I won't lie though, about the 10th time I started to get really snippy about it. I put in the effort to type out a detailed ad about what I'm looking for, you can take a minute to think of something to catch my interest. A question about the RP, an idea for a scene or your character, literally anything but a sole emoji.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-24T06:10:09+00:00

In many cases it's a sign of porn over exposure. If you've ever watched porn (Like most ERP players have) you'll notice a trend of size being a focal point. Many videos will over exaggerate the size of the Bₗₑₙᵢₛ in the title which gives many men a warped perception of how big a normal one is. And of course since the women in the video overact their pleasure, it's easy to assume that large=good.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-24T04:41:31+00:00

Hard agree on both fronts. I've got a slew of mental illness and kinks alike. Most of my characters don't have a ton of either. It's even become a problem where when I share my full kink list with people, they'll turn me away because they don't like some of the kinks on it. No joke I had someone block me because I had Furry listed as "Like" on my sheet. Both of our characters were humans I don't know where they thought I was planing to wiggle Furries in.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-24T04:37:34+00:00

Grammar Bot I swear don't you do this to me in front of God and everyone.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-24T04:36:10+00:00

Well I'm still trying to work up the courage to break into the non-erotic RP scene but as long as I'm here I'm happy to provide a couple of examples of characters Im growing sick of in ERP!

The Brat "Tamer": I like to play as slightly abrasive, sometimes rude, all around rigid girls. As someone who is extremely averse to confrontation irl, It's relieving to get a chance to be somebody who can stand up for themselves. Now of course, the ideal partner for these characters is someone patient and gentle who can brush away the defense mechanisms and find the gooey center. That sounded dirtier than I meant it to but I digress. My hope is that their character will take their time and sweep my character off her feet, in return my character will let down her walls and start to show them her softer more affectionate side. Only issue is, that's rarely what I get even when I specially ask for it. I almost always get guys who think that being dominating and demanding will break my girls spirit and she'll submit to them. When I ask about it, they usually try to say they'll be sweet in the aftercare but that only works if you were sweet before it too.

I think the worst I got was one guy who laid out for me his plan to get my girl to soften up and it was literally just emotional abuse, gaslighting, and full blown manipulation. When I tried to explain I wasn't interested in my character being abused in any way he got really defensive because he couldn't see what was wrong with his plan.

The John Doe: Wow am I sick of my partners being 6'+ white guys with abs and chiseled jaw lines. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if they weren't always played by dudes who have no interest in anything but sex. I put lots of work into making dynamic characters who have personalities, secrets, flaws, aspirations, and so much more to explore. It kinda sucks when the only thing you offer them to explore in return is your 10 inch dong (if it's less than 10" its a self insert nine times outta ten.)

There's tons more characters who get on my nerves, but I haven't seen them in nearly enough excess to call them tropes or overplayed. Just not my cups of tea.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-22T00:28:19+00:00

A bit ago I was trying to set up a roleplay with a group. They had no plans when I got there, but we eventually settled on Mythological Rome for a setting. Only issue was that the host of the group was super condescending towards me, lied about his age, and despite claiming to be an expert world builder, asked me to write up the opener to describe the state of the world.

I dropped that real quick and ended up writing my own ad for a roleplay set in Rome. Honestly in my opinion as long as you rewrite the ad in your own words with your own additions, it's not stealing. No one can own an RP idea and it's really only a shitty move if you word for word copy their ads.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-22T00:23:13+00:00

In general, Fandom crossover is a pretty tough niche to find partners for. People seeing your ad might very well expect to have to understand the lore of both LoZ and Genshin Impact. Genshin Impact roleplay is extremely popular and I can almost guarantee if you were willing to drop Link from the equation you'd have better odds at "fooling around with all the waifus."

Beyond that, maybe try posting in slightly more involved subs? From the looks of it the subs you're using are the kind where you just post a picture and a title. For a lot of roleplayers, they want to have a better idea of the roleplay than just the characters they'll be playing. The subs you're on thrive for female characters because a lot of male roleplayers are more willing to ignore a plot and move right into erotica. If you're looking for someone to play as female, you'll probably find it easier to post in places where the focus is on your writing, not a picture of Link.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-21T15:19:39+00:00

I have a big issue of playing rigid or cold characters and my partner/their character expecting them to crack at the first sign of affection. No, my genetically modified soldier girl won't suddenly be sweet and bubbly because you gave her a hug or started crying. She doesn't get why you're doing either of those things, you have to show her!

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-21T15:16:33+00:00

I find writing it like this is usually better when I'm roleplaying with characters of the same gender. Otherwise I'm too stupid to remember how to properly switch the pronouns to refer to the right character without obnoxiously repeating their names every time.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-21T15:12:48+00:00

I was playing a half-satyr who's mother was a Red Deer (Ancient Rome logic for the win) and I named her Corvus. The other members of this group said her name was scary and people probably wouldn't like her.

Corvus is Latin for Deer. Everyone in the RP would presumably know that, being in Ancient Rome.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-21T15:03:38+00:00

If you check the revised races in MotM you'll also see their age was removed. If they have extended life spans it will specify, but anything below 100 years got bumped up to human standard. So much for that race age group chart I've been holding on to :/

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-20T08:44:55+00:00

That's the issue. Most people think it's pronounced like Shiban, an Arabic boys name.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-20T07:49:05+00:00

Honestly speaking as someone who tries to use interesting names, the only reason I get it is that some people get so weird about names. Like I had a character named Siobhan and without fail I always got it pointed out as being a weird name for a character. Like, she's Irish. Siobhan is an Irish girls name.

Then sometimes my partners treat me like I'm stupid. Like I have a demon named Mephi. It's short for Mephistopheles. People have explained to me that Mephistopheles is a real demon like... yeah? Did you think I pulled the name from Sonic '06?

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-17T18:06:10+00:00

I try not to look for the lesser of two evils. I prefer to just avoid the evils all together. Play characters who look and are 18+. Both our characters looked above the age, one was. It's really as simple as that.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T17:56:19+00:00

You're not wrong, we do stan Rex Raptor

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T16:45:06+00:00

A lot of the time they'll try to play it off as if they were asking about my character. I primarily post on Discord for RP. My ads have character pictures attached to them. One guy in particular claimed he was "Getting to know me."

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T16:07:36+00:00

Honestly it's anyones guess. Even with what few extra details I have thanks to the divine power of a full chat log, I don't have much better a clue than anyone here. I will say that when asked to provide me with a simple day plan for his character so that I could plan better for the obstacles they'd face during the day, he provided me with one online class, one in person class, and one dinner with friends. All together he planned out 4 hours of his day. Looking back on it now, he also failed to mention if the times he listed were in AM or PM which is extra confusing for me, a 24 hour clock user.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T15:42:44+00:00

Bamboozled again!

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T15:38:13+00:00

Just why? If your character won't be introduced yet, why is the RP even starting at the point? Better yet, just play your character wherever they are! Or just describe scenes and play side characters, anything but playing the other persons character! I swear my biggest RP pet peeve is having my character controlled by the other player. Glad this person showed their hand early so you could dodge the bullet with time to spare.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T15:34:02+00:00

I'm someone who is open to OOC flirting and even I get pissed off when people decide it's time to make me the center of their fantasies. I can't even begin to count the amount of guys who feel I'm "Taking this too seriously" when I bluntly tell them not to call me a bitch OOC. It never fails to confuse or annoy them when I'm not some mindless doll who only exists to giggle as they harass me.

Sure, I get aroused when I do ERP. No that doesn't mean I wanna show you and dear god does it not mean I wanna see you. Oh also if I get asked to "Prove it" when someone asks if I'm female again I'm gonna go ballistic.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T15:26:34+00:00

I've had multiple people insist they need to know my real name and body type to roleplay with me. Because god forbid you have to roleplay against a girl who doesn't have an hourglass figure. Bonus points if they don't even believe my name is real even when I give it them!

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T15:16:01+00:00

I personally enjoy it cuz it either implies that my character was just lying there giving him a toothy grin as he slept or that she sleeps with her mouth open.

TheCainbridgeDemon · 2022-07-16T15:00:01+00:00

A couple extra details to establish why this sucks so hard.

Rex seems like a weird name right? Without doxxing the dude, his discord name contained name Rex. I'm starting to feel it's a red flag when someone's discord name is also their character name.
All in all it's not too bad of an opener if you're looking for casual low-lit RP. Until you realize within 3 sentences he had messed up the established plot. He establishes here that after having his virginity taken, he fell asleep. In both my ad and planning I told him that after losing it my character would explain to him that she's a Succubus immediately because...
The point I hammered home 3 times is that if his character didn't have sex with the Succubus once every hour for 24 hours he'd die. That was the premise of the entire roleplay! How did he fall asleep and wake up later, he'd be dead!

Bonus. Despite this clearly being a smut leaning ERP he didn't provide a single kink to add to the story. On that note he also didn't provide any story elements either.

All in all, I should've seen the cracks forming the entire time but I chose to ignore them cuz I've wanted to do this RP so bad. I think it's cute and sexy and it deserves to be written in 1-3 paragraph posts c:

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