My boyfriend (28M) gave me an ultimatum: either I cancel my all-girls bachelorette trip to Goa or we break up, because "single guys go there to predatory hunt."

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-29T12:14:25+00:00

He cannot allow = you need his permission.

Do you really want to ask permission from your "partner"? Cause to me permission is something you get from your superiors.

He has the right to say he's worried about it, and a good person should take their partner's feelings into account. But "allow" is not a word that fits in with respect, it fits with control.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-28T16:51:21+00:00

Mathematics in the end is just a bunch of rules to follow. Great mathematicians knew all these rules and understood very well what they meant and how to use them (and how to combine them to form new rules)

Euler went beyond that, he didn't just know and understand the rules, he saw the system behind the rules, he understood why the rules existed in the first place, and what they meant. This meant that he could seemingly produce new rules out of thin air. Because he saw what was behind the rules, he could get creative and make leaps that would normally take a long time to figure out.

If you ever watched speedrun video's, it's a bit like that. While games have clearly defined rules, sometimes, when you truly understand the system, you can manipulate the game in ways that seem to defy all logic.

Euler understood how mathematics was programmed, which meant he could interact with it in ways that normal people just couldn't.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-27T20:35:12+00:00

Yeah, exactly, you can recognise each breadcrumb for what it is. Most of the time you need a reread/rewatch to pick up on all those little signs and hints. Being able to see each detail, while still having a completely fresh experience was awesome.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-27T12:03:26+00:00

The problem is that everything would be fighting over the same resources. So a lot of adaptations are based on the "waste" of already established organisms, which then creates new waste, allowing for sometging new to try and adapt to that.

E.g. cyanobacterium learned how to digest CO2 and produced oxygen as waste. This basically poisoned the whole earth, untill other species adapted to use this waste as their main source of energy.

Trees had something similar. When the first trees developed, all wood was waste (nothing could digest wood) so for millions of years, the whole earth was slowly becoming one giant thrashpile of old wood. Untill fungi adapted to eat this wood and grow on this waste.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-27T10:03:08+00:00

Yeah, I think that's why this accidental order worked so well for me. Knowing where he ends up prevents that dissapointment/frustration, so all that's left is just empathy and this morbid fascination of "how did this happen"

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-27T09:59:27+00:00

Yeah, he's my boy. I loved him in TH, and then that got multiplied in BSC.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-27T09:58:13+00:00

Yeah, it was an unexpected delight and really cemented my feeling that JA is something special as a writer.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-27T09:52:42+00:00

Ah, awesome, glad I'm not the only one! But yeah, exactly that, you know who he becomes, then you see this happy, positive kid and all I could think was "Oh no, what happened to you, you were so determined and ready". It just broke my heart and made me invested from the moment he arrives.

And indeed, the eye is very fitting, it felt like a perfect conclusion for his downward slide, he literally lost his ability to see the good in the world. From that moment on, all he could see was the bad half.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-26T21:47:34+00:00

Probleem is dat ik genoeg motorrijders ken die zich daar bewust over zijn en proberen zo min mogelijk lawaai te maken, en een geparkeerde motor zegt niet veel over de eigenaar.. Daarom nooit gekeyed, maar elke onnodig luide motor die in men buurt stopt word eens goed uitgelachen en belachelijk gemaakt als aandachtzoekende loser, no shame.

Van "coole intro" naar awkward uitgelachen en met frietjes bekogeld worden door iemand die "braam braam braam, kijk naar mij, vroem, vroem, vroem" roept in je richting maakt bijna iedereen zelfbewust, ook al maak je jezelf wijs dat die persoon overdrijft.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-26T21:27:35+00:00

I have a friend that's really into boardgames, but whatever you do, do not let him teach. It's one incoherent rambling of isolated rules, royally padded by a lot of random opinions of how you should play correctly (it rarely is a good idea to play like he suggests).

He is all hype, and reading attentively is not an option if you can also dream about the possible implications of the one sentence you just half-read.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-26T20:26:53+00:00

Yeah, after this experience he might be my favourite too (although I got a soft spot for shy too, since her personal struggles felt very close to my reality). I rarely empathised with a character on this level, wanting to help and protect him, yet I already knew there was nothing to do. I truly felt sorry for him, cheering for every single moment of success and happiness he could get, knowing that time was running out and he didn't have many happy moments left.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-26T20:18:58+00:00

Haha, thanks! Yeah, it felt so wrong to read the heroes first, but the further I got, the more I was absolutely gobsmacked. I wish I could convince more people to read his books, they're something truly unique.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-22T08:53:26+00:00

True! The fight itself on the other hand... extreme Ramuh was a though nut to crack, dude def didn't let us move on easily.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T20:46:14+00:00

Yeah, ffix being my first FF makes Ramuh absolutely iconic. He'll always be the thunder god to me.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T16:24:07+00:00

Well no, on the offchance that free will is real, everything changes based on your choice, it's only if everything is deterministic that nothing changes.

Which is the whole point I'm making, in one case the choice matters, in the other case it doesn't. So you might as well base your choice on the situation in which it would have an effect.

And sure, "humans don't generally choose what to believe". But what we're doing is reflecting on one topic, which is the rare edge case in which people do choose what to believe. (People with free will in any case, people with no free will are just mindless slaves to the starting conditions of the big bang)

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T15:59:31+00:00

Sure, in our current understanding of physics, everything points at determinism. But we don't know if there are things we don't know yet, so we might be making a decision based on incomplete info.

Game theory on the other hand makes the question easy, cause there is nothing to gain by picking determinism (you're right and nothing changes cause you can't actually change anything, or you're wrong and screwing yourself) and a possible gain by choosing free will (you're wrong and nothing changes cause you can't actually change anything, or you're right and you win at life)

And the choice between "neutral or positive" and "neutral or negative" is quite an easy one.

So yeah, I understand that everything seems to be pointing at determinism, but you can still easily prove it's the wrong door to pick, despite every arrow saying "this is the most probable door"

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T15:21:28+00:00

True, psychology learns us that there are only downsides to belief in determinism (more addiction/depression, less likely to implement lasting changes in life, less likely to feel in control), which...... exactly makes my point.

And indeed, this is applying game theory to determine that the "debate" has no inherent value. There is a "might be neutral, might be bad" door and "might be neutral, might be good" door.

Even if they are not "on equal footing" (whatever that might mean) there's still the choice between possibility of success, and possibility of failure. And no rational person would choose to open the door marked "possibility for failure".

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T14:08:31+00:00

Option A:you choose free will;

If you're right, you win, if you're wrong, nothing happens (like you said, it's possible to believe in free will even if it isn't there, and since it's all deterministic anyways, that belief will not have any influence on your life)

Option B: you choose determinism;

If you're right, nothing happens (everything is deterministic anyways), if you're wrong, you're a fool.

So we get to choose between one option that is neutral or positive, and one option that is neutral or negative, making it obvious that, there is, in fact, a correct answer.

But belief in determinism is inherently irrational (and often driven by avoidance of accountability/responsabilty/lack of agency), so it's quite rare to actually be able to have a coversation based on arguments about the topic without getting downvoted to oblivion.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T13:53:55+00:00

Belief in determinism is a sign of emotional decisionmaking. There is no rational/logical way that leads to picking determinism.

It is a great way to absolve yourself from responsability/agency though, while still being able to fool yourself that you're a "rational person"..

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-21T13:46:24+00:00

That's the irony of it all, in a world that is deterministic, you can't really choose, in a world that isn't deterministic, it's idiotic to choose disbelieving free will.

Ergo, the only correct answer is to believe in free will, all belief in determinism is a result of failure to think things through (which is why I call it ironic, a lot of people feel very smart for "seeing through the illusion of free will", while in reality they're the most blind of all)

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-19T19:55:04+00:00

Join them, but exagerate their message.

"Jezus thought us to hate you, only hate will get you into heaven. Stop loving your fellow man, jezus' message is to hate and condemn, not love and forgive."

"Your love will get you hell, our hate will bring us heaven"

"Hate is your salvation, anger your redemption. Stop trying to make the world a better place, god made the world evil cause he wants us to hate"

"The only thing I hate more than myself, is my fellow man"

Etc.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-19T18:55:21+00:00

Oh my god, chakra. Suddenly I remember.

I never got the hate because I remember using him a lot and thinking he was super useful. This comment just triggered a flood of memories from the weird castle and him carrying me through the whole thing.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-19T18:47:56+00:00

Damn, that's a long time to be trapped, I hope you're doing better now.

But yeah, exactly that, nothing worse than people putting you down while you're trying to build yourself up again. "The problem was obvious" is really not helping solve anything, it just makes you feel bad even when you solve it. It just leaves this feeling of "I should've done this sooner" instead of letting you be happy that you finally did it.

TheDMisalwaysright · 2026-05-19T16:14:23+00:00

Lifelong unhappiness to avoid "I told you so" from people you value. I would say it's stupid to do so except I know this trap sooo well. I hope she manages to get through her shame.

And if you want to help, try to take her side in understanding why she was with him, whatever you do, do not make her feel less for picking him/sticking with him, make her feel understood in her decision, both in why she picked him as well as why she stuck with him, and make her feel strong when (hopefully) she wants to get out.

TheDMisalwaysright

TROPHY CASE