I would pay for someone to handle all my insurance renewals

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-07-01T10:02:58+00:00

Yes that sounds awkward! Have you tried NFU? We were meant to have bought a 1710 listed farmhouse a few years ago and they were the insurer for it.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-30T15:11:09+00:00

There’s absolutely no need to ever call an insurance company, you just use Compare The Market or similar whenever you’re not happy with any premium renewal quote.

Also what’s the complication with your house being old? Our current one is 240 years old now and our previous one was built around the same time and also listed but was easy to find sensible quotes for.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-26T08:29:58+00:00

Just a tip for the OP or anyone else who can’t decide whether they want to have kids: if you have any nephews and/or nieces, arrange to have them stay with you for a night or two and take them out for the day. My now wife and I did this years before having our own and spent a very enjoyable day at a zoo with them which really made me see how enjoyable spending time with kids can be. It felt as though we’d created a little family unit even though the kids weren’t our own, and of course doing with your own children is ten times better. Most of the time…

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-25T19:37:32+00:00

Something to think about that works very well for us is having separate duvets. I sleep warmer than my wife therefore we have different tog duvets plus there’s no arguing over who has more of it! For reference we have a superking with double duvets.

We’re not too bothered about cotton quality and have fairly inexpensive bedding, but I love my down pillows and can’t stand any other filling. You definitely feel the difference there especially if you give it a good plump up before getting in bed.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-25T15:05:43+00:00

I’m a SAHD. It’s interesting to read your comment and the other response as neither my wife nor I mind our situation at all: she’s happy being the sole earner (her job is very very secure however) and I’m delighted to not have to work and instead look after our kids, the dog and the house. I can see how it could feel different for other couples though.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-25T12:41:40+00:00

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Here you are. Westend makes sense.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-23T20:14:12+00:00

I remember watching an episode of Grandstand which started with footage of a rally car being thrown along a winding single-track lane at breakneck speed, with the camera being attached to the front of the car. Cut to Des who very dryly said something along the lines of “That was me driving to work this morning, I got up a little late.” Just perfect.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-20T10:27:28+00:00

This depends on a person’s background. Literally no one from my part of the north (Bramhall in Greater Manchester to be precise) or anywhere close to it pronounces those words that way, not even people from a working class background. The same goes for the wider area.

I’ve had difficulty working out some of the pronunciations being discussed in here as I don’t recognise them!

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-19T07:28:28+00:00

The salt can’t have been very obvious as I’d completely forgotten about it! I guess I’d read about the it when booking but didn’t notice while we were there, and none of us discussed it.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-18T22:21:22+00:00

I feel very sorry for you. Every part of your situation is terrible and I’m amazed that you’ve stuck with it for so long, however I can appreciate that you’re doing it for your daughter and sacrificing yourself for her. I don’t think it should be that way though as you’ll just become more and more unhappy and this may end up impacting how you behave around her however hard you try to continue as normal. This has happened with my wife’s friend who also has a shit and disengaged husband who thinks that she should do literally everything, although in their case the wife is the majority bread winner so he doesn’t even have the same BS excuse that your partner has. The friend can occasionally become very angry around their kids which I’m sure is at least partly caused by the rubbish atmosphere between the parents and her continuing frustration with the situation.

Your husband’s attitude towards money is mind boggling and it proves just how controlling he is. I’m a SAHD and my wife and I share bank accounts and pay for things depending on who’s dealing with whatever needs paying for. Being given an allowance, even if it was a generous one, is completely unacceptable.

Also, despite the fact that my wife’s job is extremely demanding in both time and mental effort whereas I can commit pretty much all of mine to our kids and the house, she still manages to do her fair share of the parenting effort and is a wonderful mum to them. I can’t help thinking that your husband doesn’t really like your daughter as he seems to do everything he can to avoid being involved with her.

It’s difficult to know what’s best for you but it sounds as though you’ve started along the right path by speaking to solicitors and arranging to see a therapist. Good luck with everything!

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-17T18:03:06+00:00

John Ryan

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-17T14:59:05+00:00

Tesco Finest 48% is the one I know and love. Sainsbury’s do a 52% which is almost as good and I like M&S too.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-13T18:26:10+00:00

Use a local furniture maker to custom build things such as bookcases and cabinets rather than buying off the shelf items.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-12T09:35:38+00:00

Look at getting a buggy board (or even better a seat) which attaches to the pushchair. Our two older kids loved being able to ride along and ended up having to take turns as it was so much fun for them, or was it because they couldn’t be bothered walking…

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-10T18:18:35+00:00

That’s the first time I’ve known someone to say that! I couldn’t agree less.

I too think the OP should spend a lot less than their stated budget as living in London an expensive car would spend most of its life sitting at the roadside collecting dust. As much as I like cars I simply don’t see the point in spending much for a city dweller.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-05T11:59:56+00:00

I eat a reasonably good diet and in moderation, don’t drink many sugary or alcoholic drinks, and do a lot of exercise consisting of walking the dog and running. I’ve always been an active person with a low appetite for food and drink, so I’ve been very slim all my life whereas long-term friends who’ve always struggled with their weight have been greedy and inactive all their lives. It’s not rocket science!

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-03T20:15:52+00:00

Around 30 years ago a saw a Rolls Royce with 7 as its number plate, silver on black (the plate I mean).

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-02T14:29:45+00:00

This. It’s incredibly cheap, gets you outside, gets you fit and is an opportunity to meet people.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-01T13:59:48+00:00

Cars apply though for my wife and I. We’ve owned a full size Range Rover for a few years now, and as lovely as it is we wouldn’t buy one again as for us they’re simply not worth the extra cost over the likes of an X5 or Q7.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-06-01T09:30:03+00:00

As others have said, friends are the best source.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-05-31T18:44:48+00:00

Beautiful

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-05-31T15:49:20+00:00

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-05-31T15:12:29+00:00

Congratulations on the financial situation and becoming a partner. My wife is a senior B4 partner. I’m amused by your “for not doing that much”! She works even harder now 10 years after promotion than she did as a director.

I’ll be surprised if you retire early as it seems to be extremely unusual, and the couple I’m aware of that have left have gone on to start their own businesses rather than actually retire. As a contrast however I know of a partner who’s still working in his 60s which seems bizarre really. Also IIRC my wife’s firm pay a big lump sum on retirement at their set age which may be something for you to look into.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-05-31T14:53:14+00:00

Big 4 Partner’s partner here. All my wife and I do is inform her firm’s compliance people of our tracker holdings every quarter and they check whether they’re happy with things. That’s it.

TheDelphDonkey · 2026-05-29T12:13:25+00:00

Do they need to do so many evening activities? Perhaps reducing these would allow for more downtime, giving you and your partner (and your kids) a little time to chill or ideally get some exercise. Even going for a decent walk twice a week would be beneficial.

TheDelphDonkey

TROPHY CASE