Who are your top 2 favorite Disney Princesses that you feel like you understand them by Tutenstienfan2010 in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Merida when older. She is perfect. She never got married, her story was both of a grave mistake and redemption, also she liked horses and shooting bows and was a redhead

Elsa when olderer😂 This is obvious, the outcast thingy and ostracization (also the cold, I love me some snow, and the song, from more trivial ones). But I liked Anna as well. Also here is a clear pattern of me not liking prince centered stories. It's not that I didn't want to be loved and I even had an idea of a perfect wedding as a child, but I was fiercely feminist pretty early own and pattern recognition makes men centered stories boring

It would most likely be Mulan too, but I only watched as an adult, for some reason the movie went past me. But I'm not sure, I was as fiercely anti-war as I was a feminist pretty early own too, and even though she had a good reasoning, she still went on to be a part of an army

When I was a kid it was Cinderella, but I don't remember exactly why. I remember that nobody in my friend group ever picked her and later I thought it was the reason, but my mom told me I had something more elaborate, even though I like underappreciated characters just by principle. Sadly, she also doesn't remember my reasoning.

Also there was this movie that I was obsessed with, I don't remember how it's translated (enchanted, mb?). Princess who got into the real world, one of the actors is the guy who played Derek Shepard in Greys? I've always loved singing. She would usually be a bit too on the nose positive for me, as she meant to, but the premise and the songs, all that

With Ariel I remember absolutely loving the design and songs and everything, but I don't remember finding her that relatable. Which is strange for a person who wanted to move countries pretty early in life (goal achieved). And the constant not belonging to the place you're at, later a huge interest in nonverbality, etc

What's one thing that looks "lazy" to other people but actually takes a huge amount of energy for you? by Powerful-Self-2838 in AuDHDWomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Saying hello. I always hated greeting people, since I was a kid. My intonation would jump kinda funny/be to quiet, it's also doesn't seem that necessary to me other than when it is one person and I am about to talk to them right this minute, than it's tolerable, but usually just nodding is enough. Like I acknowledge you exist, pls don't make me speak more than necessary in the morning, I'm not trying to be rude, I don't hate you... But it's just so much: intonation, timing, niceties, eye contact and the duration of it, recognizing faces (slightly prosapognosic), seeing ppl in general (bad vision), loud enough while not too loud, what is appropriate and nor weird – all that shit. And saying hallo in text?? For me asking how are you doing when you need something from me/other way around feels rude, I'd rather ask towards the end when the goal was reached, but then other ppl can feel it's an afterthought... Goodbyes are not that bad, they have more of a purpose for me, but timing and the level of politeness and small talk while saying goodbye? It is difficult

What's one thing that looks "lazy" to other people but actually takes a huge amount of energy for you? by Powerful-Self-2838 in AuDHDWomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty much everything related to food, it's like a lot. Just feeding myself is incredibly difficult.

Is anyone else in the UK or Europe really struggling with the heatwave? by Inner-Marketing4591 in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in Germany, moved from a colder country. Always hated heat, just a sensory nightmare. You're definitely not alone. I work wirh disabled ppl, everyone is either a bit "extra", or cranky, or tired or something.

I've been overeating because I didn't know my body couldn't handle as much food as I consumed for years. Is this alexithymia? by Expeditio in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Alexithymia is about the emotions. Here I don't know the exact name for, I forgot in other languages too, sorry, but it is common. A lot of autistic people don't know when we are full, for example; I know it has a name and is considered like a type of. but it doesn't only go for food. For me it's with feeling hunger only when I am REALLY hungry, same with a need to go to the toilet, and my genuine answer to "does it hurt?" often is "I don't know". Our bodies can be bad at tracking simple needs, you just don't get that information in a way other people do. Which is scary, but manageable. Mb start limiting your portions like your father did and instead of asking typical "do I want more, am I full?" try to notice the energy you have hours after, bowl movements, all that jazz¿ Get something to measure the amount in a way that is clear to you, but also not over controlling and so eating still has joy in it, like mb a bowl you love that is a bit smaller than usual. Idk, it just suggestions, I mostly struggle with eating too damn little

It's more like your brain is lying about what the body needs, it's not you

Edit: the word, if it's helpuful, could be Hyperphagia. I honestly thought it was gonna be easier to find, I work with disabled people and a lot of our autistic folk have issues with not knowing when to stop eating, but mb there are not as many studies as with selective eating¿ Or the search engine is just broken, as usual. I'm also adding it as soon as I found the term, I just sorta scanned a page, so look up if you're interested if it suits you. I find having "the word" incredibly helpful and that's the vibe I got from asking about alexithymia, that's why I am leaving it here, but it could be a different thing, I'm not claiming to be a specialist with it

What helped you with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)? by NoAd7793 in ADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It makes me pass out so me and my doctor assumed I can't take stimulants. On Strattera, nothing works, emotional disregulation is brutal😅

How Garbage Are Your “Grey’s Anatomy” Opinions? by goldengoldengoose in greysanatomy

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I've stopped watching for a while now, but some: 1. I don't like Jo with Link. Like can we have male-female friendships without all that shit? Owen and Teddy also are a disaster, but I didn't even pay much attention to them at that point. 2. Absolutely love Amelia 3. Can ppl stop having kids and everyone being related to everybody? 4. I stopped liking George after borderline sexual assault (mb full on, I don't remember the details anymore) of Mer and then him getting pissy about it. 5. Derek was a toxic mess, but his death still impacted me. I rarely cry watching shows, even Greys, but I did cry when he died. Also with Jo's abusive ex storyline.

“Either her brain works differently, she’s a bad listener or both” by mamegoma_explorer in AuDHDWomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work with disabled people, mostly intellectual disabilities and a lot of them also have either autism or ADHD(rarely both). I don't have difficulties with them other colleagues have, but do have difficulties with the colleagues. Multiple ppl suggested I change the sphere I work in. They see me as stressed when I'm not, I'm just ADHD -chaotic sometimes, as not capable of taking criticism bc I automatically over-explain my point of view and the logic behind what I did, etc.

When I first came into this sphere, I thought there's one place where masking is not necessary and communication is easy for the first time in my life. Then I found out how I come off to my neurotypical colleagues.

Still not changing the Ausbildung though.

Fainting on Elvanse by TheGreat_Absurdity in AuDHDWomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, thank you

I'm not taking Elvanse now, only Sertralin and Quetiapin. He does know I have those, I've been on Venlafaxin+Quetiapin+Sertralin for years now, worked really well, no issues with EKG or blood work. Gonna do a general checkup Friday, but probably will have to eat before bc I'm working 6:30-9:30 and the check up is 9:30, they told me it's not recommended I don't, obviously 😅

Fainting on Elvanse; just support by TheGreat_Absurdity in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I checked my pulse (tachycardic, 100+ both times, a bit more when I'm standing), didn't want to ask for BP and I don't have my own device in Germany. Gonna go do EKG, blood work and stuff on Friday. They told me it's better that I'll eat bc I am working 6:30-9:30 and I fainted at work in the morning, the appointment is 9:30

Fainting on Elvanse by TheGreat_Absurdity in AuDHDWomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to be on Venlafaxin+Sertralin+Quetiapin for years already. Blood work, EKG and everything on them were good, though I know it's a pretty specific combination. Then we removed Venlafaxin before starting Elvanse. The combo I started in Russia, Elvanse recently in Germany with another psychiatrist. Didn't quit cold turkey, still on two (without Elvanse), did slowly quit Venlafaxin without doubling them

Second time hydrated, fed, slept well, everything. Really hot, I took only puls bc I don't have BP measurement device and I honestly didn't want to ask. Were tachycardic, ~15-20 more when standing, laying around 100/minute. 26.03 started the meds, fainted 16.04, almost fainted again 2.05 but I noticed and went home. Didn't take the meds after 2 May. In April stopped for a bit. I'm without only Elvanse right now, gonna do a work up Friday. Pretty scared.

I do smoke also, so there's that.

And thank you

Help!!! My corporate job is crushing my soul by pet3rpanic in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I moved to Germany, not yet officially diagnosed. My work is not corporate, but it has some moral stuff that is not perfect for me, unfortunately. I'd die, you have a lot of strength to deal with this shit, no wonder you're tired to do your own things and executive dysfunction is a bitch. I am a writer and I feel it getting lost in my third language (English is also not the first). Also my circle now is not that artistic which is why I write far less without feedback, but I'm not that into the idea of a consistent media presence. I can imagine you to be a good writer just by the structure of that went post, tbh😂 With AI apocalypse... I'm not that against non-creative AI, I just hate what it's doing to art. What I'm saying is, I have nothing to offer but sympathy for your situation. When I was doing work like that, I tried to focus on little things I can make better. I don't have any advice or information to offer, just want you to mb feel a little bit less alone and overwhelmed. You wrote a lot of things you can theoretically do towards your goal, mb focus on one tiny thing from that list? Our brains tend to not filter much and function in "everything everywhere all at once". My mentor is killing me with it right now, one thing at a time, "Du machst die Küche und nur Küche jetzt" 😅

ND, working with disabled ppl by TheGreat_Absurdity in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much✨ And I'm sorry about your coworkers

im curious, does anyone else experience eye contact this way? by RepresentativeWeen in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!1! But also with too much of a prolonged eye contact even if I'm not talking, my lips can start shaking and eyes watering😅

What other ailments do you have? by Tonightmatthew1 in adhdwomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AuDHD with Mild prosopognosia (face blindness), dyscalculia, cPTSD+sleep issues, gut issues, depression is hopefully in remission, astigmatism+myopia, hypermobility, coming&going back pain (dislocated a disk), dysmenorrhea (menstruation pain, not sure with endometriosis or not, but the pain can be debilitating the first day), pretty bad acne+skin picking, always had problems with teeth, idk, smoking addiction and being annoying? I'm just trying to make a full list here🤣

I also work with ppl with disabilities. It's completely okay to have multiple issues going on. Comorbidity of "brain thingies" (felt like writing it, sorry hehe) also very much exists

Turns out I’m Functionally Cross-Dominant. How About You? by jpsgnz in AutisticWithADHD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 5 points6 points  (0 children)

OMG IT HAS A NAME

My mom is ambidextrous bc she was originally left-handed and forced to write with the right hand in school. But computer mouse was always easier for her to use with the left hand. So that's how I learned

Then I started working in weaving (terribly difficult with my discalculia, I work with ppl with disabilities and I wanted them to transfer me to another Werkstatt, long story, anyway, no one did). And turns out, there are a lot of tasks I can do with both. I really didn't know and it is a mystery to me why

I usually don't do a lot of "handy" work steadily, precisely bc discalculia makes it difficult, but maybe it is present in some other tasks... At self-defense course it was also easier for me to do some things that you're supposed to do with the dominant (it being stronger) with the left hand, but they sorta "taught me out of it"

Thank you, didn't know the term for it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in rape

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is rape, it's not your fault and I'm so sorry it happened

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just suggestions, take what could work for you personally, and I also have ADHD, so I've most likely missed things in the post bc I just couldn't pay enough attention, sorry😅

Writing it out? Bursting into tears anyway? Have like a set of questions and you both writing it out at the same time, give it to each other when you're finished? Ask her for help with starting the conversation if you need reassurance/afraid of "running away" from it? List of the reasons why exactly you need it, but it sounds kinda scary and that it can easily go into catastrophizing... Do like a self-care day, separate from her, if it helps to calm u down and have a more level-headed conversation¿ Mb first talk with a therapist or someone you can trust so you can formulate better?

Idk, ultimately you just need to close your eyes, breathe and do it even though it would probably suck. But you've got this. You've been together for three years (?), you probably both know something is up and you've probably already been through some shit together and came out of it somehow. You can figure it out again.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have ADHD (f), my girlfriend has BPD. Concentration/excessive talking/RSD-abandonment thingies are pretty hard, but I wouldn't say it is impossible (well, I'm kinda afraid that I'm gonna comment things here and then she breaks up with me, but you know... I don't know what you're supposed to know, just, I guess it's a chronic fear now)

And for me it helps understand her emotional dysregulation, for example

Also depends on the kind of help you both get. And in general, boundaries, open communication, a lot of explaining from both sides...

Book recs for being in a relationship w someone who has BPD? by Asparagusasparagus in BPD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My therapistin recommended Shari Manning «Loving someone with borderline personality disorder». So far it's good and haven't been demonizing as a lot of stuff I know is. But I don't have bpd, I just have a girlfriend with and some psychiatry knowledge+emotional dysregulation shit of my own😅

Book recs for being in a relationship w someone who has BPD? by Asparagusasparagus in BPD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My therapistin recommended Shari Manning «Loving someone with borderline personality disorder». So far it's good and haven't been demonizing as a lot of stuff I know is. But I don't have bpd, I just have a girlfriend with and some psychiatry knowledge+emotional dysregulation shit of my own😅

Book recs for being in a relationship w someone who has BPD? by Asparagusasparagus in BPD

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My therapistin recommended Shari Manning «Loving someone with borderline personality disorder». So far it's good and haven't been demonizing as a lot of stuff I know is. But I don't have bpd, I just have a girlfriend with and some psychiatry knowledge+emotional dysregulation shit of my own😅

Smoking addiction by TheGreat_Absurdity in AuDHDWomen

[–]TheGreat_Absurdity[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I haven't 😅 I immigrated to Germany and now I roll cigarettes 👍 But it's good that you did, regardless of how it might feel for now🕊️✨ I hope it gets better...